GET THAT PIZZA!

Wm, now dressed as a Luddite protester from the 1800s, destroys the clone machine with a stick and steals the pizza from Clone-Tails.

Nine Tailed Cat though, while smart enough to build a cloning lab, wasn’t too bright on where to put it. Right next to a cemetery. The zombie of Idiot looks at a world where...Dvorak didn’t brush their teeth this morning. Not too much is different, and the Pizza-Pocolypse is still going on. Sadly this universe’s pizza fell into lava because frog Dvorak couldn’t save it. Funnily enough, this universe’s Gumball, Anais, Justin Bieber, Eddie Van Halen, Barack Obama, Mike Dirnt, Ink Blot, and occono have all Jumped into the lava retrieving the pizza, and dying. Slowly, Idiot runs for William’s pizza! He successfully takes it and runs off.

Meanwhile...

Darwin has made friends with the dark dimension. When the universe exploded, he went in, and then went out in this new universe. He needs to find his friend Dookie, who also went through a portal.

Edited by DookieIdiotNimrod on Jul 20th 2020 at 12:54:57 PM

Knife enters this new universe decked out in the gear of a paladin. She consults the DND handbook; she can smell the odor of Idiot's undead nature, smite him by an extra 1d8, and give him disadvantage on an Abjure Enemy saving throw.

She slices through the zombies seemlessly and makes her way to Idiot. Her sword cracking with a divine storm, she terrifies him and delivers a powerful divine smite. She grabs the pizza; the subject of her vow of vengance, and runs.

deadass though, GET THAT PIZZA! would make an amazing show

Edited by MadameButterflyKnife on Jul 20th 2020 at 4:20:40 AM

As Knife is running, the DM asks her for her passive Perception score, which turns out to be too low to notice the arcane trickster Nine-Tailed Cat in hiding. He uses his Mage Hand Legerdemain to swipe the pizza as a bonus action, then hides once again.

Edited by NineTailedCat on Jul 20th 2020 at 1:28:04 AM

West, revived by a friendly necromancer and a bit angry at the fact Knife killed her, hits Knife with a meteor hammer she borrowed from a Wuxia side character and then finds Nine-Tailed Cat and fishes the pizza away, praying that whoever wants to snatch it from her just takes it without violence.

You misgendered me.

Edited by JTTWlover on Jul 20th 2020 at 11:04:41 AM

fixed.

“I understand what you’re feeling.”

West looks up.

She sees Nimrod.

“Everyone I loved was killed over pizza. Yet When the pizza fell, even more people died.”

(Beat)

“So why do you have it?”

West explains her situation. She hands the pizza over to Nimrod, who says he is fighting for peace in these hard times. Nimrod gets the pizza. Looking inside, he doesn’t want to eat the pizza, but he wants to keep the new pizza secret and gone.

Edited by DookieIdiotNimrod on Jul 20th 2020 at 2:57:19 AM

Dookie hears a weird humming, droning sound. Turning behind, he sees Dhiruxide charging up the BFG and shoots in Dookie's direction. Dookie gets reduced to charred Ludicrous Gibs, leaving the pizza... as usual, in one piece, unharmed.

He goes and picks it up nonchalantly. What? He's a Blood Knight. Being brilliant, he summons Cthulhu and gives him the slice of pizza for safekeeping. His mind is fried and gets squished for his troubles.

Fortunately, Wm passed his SAN check, so he is unaffected (that's how this works, right?). He then sells Cthulhu a Bridge in Brooklyn (TM) for the Pizza and walks off like nothing happened.

UNTIL...

Nine-Tailed Cat beams the pizza aboard his starship and flies off with it to another planet.

Edited by NineTailedCat on Jul 20th 2020 at 2:36:34 AM

But while Nine is flying, he hears something. A loud, BOOM!

The next thing he knows, his ship has crashed down and he is hurt inside. He barely escapes the debries as the ship loes down in sorrow.

"Get away from him you bitch."

Dookie appeard at Nimrod's side, tending to his injuries. He has a rocket launcher in his hand. Luckily, Nimrod is not too hurt to be dead.

Dookie yeets the pizza far away from the place where Nimrod was hurt.

"Why the fuck did you kill him???", Dookie angrily asks Cat.

Cat explains that he wasnt the one who killed Nimrod, and that the act was done by someone else.

"Oh. Ok. Sorry for shooting your ship. I can fix that."

So Dookie Does. And Cat is informed of Nimrod's plan to stop the Pizza from killing more, and Dookie's story about while staying as far away as possible from the pizza, he was hurt on a deep level still.

"C'mon Nimrod, lets go."

Meanwhile where the pizza was yeeted...

Edited by DookieIdiotNimrod on Jul 20th 2020 at 2:55:03 AM

Just so you know, it's kind of bad form to dictate what other people's characters are doing in a roleplay.

ignore.

Edited by DookieIdiotNimrod on Jul 20th 2020 at 2:54:00 AM

...right into Dhiruxide's hands.

He is not feeling particularly hungry at this moment, which surprises him. Odd, he thinks.

Staring deep into the Alien Sky for few minutes, he thinks of a new (dumb) plan.

It involves ninjas.

Battalions after battalions of ninjas.

Before he came to this planet, he robbed a galactic baron on his way to the planet, and stole his valuable belongings to pay the ninjas (how convenient). He orders them to safeguard the pizza in an undisclosed location on the planet. Whilst they do so, he goes to the bushes to do business, pants down...

Damned Conservation of Ninjutsu!

Edited by Dhiruxide on Jul 20th 2020 at 3:50:42 AM

...while I, still in the Nether, make a bunch of stupid ninja signs and suddenly show up in the new dimension, despite having been sealed off from every known location.
I just so happen to land above the ninjas.
Needless to say, I also just so happened to have a g u n.
So I walk out, holding the pizza, maybe with a few scratches, but oh well.

Edited by Smiley100P on Jul 20th 2020 at 3:10:42 AM

PointMaid has eaten her way to the Large Hadron Collider and uses it to create a wormhole portal following everyone to this new universe. Turns out, pizza can be used as exotic matter.

She turns into a very vampiric, but very cute, wolf puppy, starts begging like a dog, and lopes off with the pizza between her prominent canines.

Jake, who had been in shock, books a flight to the Large Hadron Collider. Instead of entering the wormhole, he throws a Universe Collapser inside. Unfortunately, he forgot to get the pizza. Completely forgetting about about the Universe Collapser, he jumps in, falling on Point Maid. He quickly gets his bearing and grabs the pizza.

Edited by jaketroper on Jul 20th 2020 at 3:57:32 AM

A single frog on the last pizza-free ship in the previous universe programs the ship's hyperdrive to take him to the next one. If it's not T H E pizza, then Noid take it.

3...

2...

1...

0!

The universe goes "Glurp!" and tastes of paisley for a moment, then the ship pops into reality right on top of Jake. I have its laser cannons snipe him, then abduct the pizza with the matter transporter.

Full speed ahead. Steady as she goes. The pizza is mine because I have a star cruiser and you don't. Neener neener neener. Nothing can stop me no-

Edited by dvorak on Jul 20th 2020 at 5:45:53 AM

The Star Cruiser is stopped handily by the effects of gravity. Namely, a black hole. The cruiser is sucked into the black hole and into a tiny little pocket dimension where Knife has been chilling out with her pegasus, preparing her next move. Shocked a bit at how sudden this whole series of events was, she steps on the tiny frog and goes to enjoy her pizza.

Dhiruxide, frustrated as ever (and shortsighted as well), does an incredibly complex ritual to summon Knife and her pegasus in a back alley in your generic far-future dystopian neon city. Taken back by the sudden summoning, Knife has no time to react as Dhiruxide slices her head off with a sword. As Knife's head rolls away and falls into the mother of all smelliest sewers, Dhiruxide picks up the pizza. However, he didn't account for the pegasus attacking Dhiruxide, and the commotion attracts the attention of this city's State Sec...

...Which Jake is a part of! He runs towards Dhurixide. “You Make Me Sic... my turtles on you!” Suddenly, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles jump out of the sewer and subdue Dhurixide. Before they can eat the pizza, Jake takes it from them and runs. Great, now he’s added more organisms to the list of ones that want the pizza.

Fools! Killing me only destroyed my frog form! Ribbit.

Using the lingering traces of magic in my body, I teleport to the city. The starcruiser can be used as a secret base of operations. I Tele-Frag Jaketroper and grab the pizza.

Edited by dvorak on Jul 21st 2020 at 7:50:26 AM

"I Like Cars."

The alternate universe version of the I Like Trains Kid Runs over dvorak and tqkes the pizza away from his corpse. But just before he puts it in his mouth...

GCB decapitates the alternate universe version of the I Like Trains Kid with an oversized machete. He picks up the pizza, only to also be picked up by a giant claw machine.

Wm, now dressed as the three-eyed aliens from the Toy Story movies, goes "The clAAAw!" and tries to win the pizza by grabbing GCB. Unfortunately, the claw lets go mid-way through the trek, and the pizza lands on...

"The game's rigged!" quips Wm as he watches Dvorak's post play out.

Nah, you're good. Everyone in this game is OP, that's part of the charm. My joke was meant to be a "crane games are rigged" joke, sorry if it came off as aggressive.

Edited by WilliamRadarStorm on Jul 22nd 2020 at 9:54:12 AM

...The floor.

Or at least, it would have if I hadn't come back as a ghost and spirited it away to the pocket dimension inside the black hole. That starcruiser is now my Domain. There's no way anyone can get the pizza away from m-!

I realized I'm being OP, bear with me. I will play fair, don't worry.

Edited by dvorak on Jul 21st 2020 at 8:21:18 AM