Ridin' the Hyperlinks (a text adventure game)

>Find somewhere else to go.

> find edible food

>Ask if a world exists outside the Arcade.

>And when Fitz answers, ponder the philosophical implications of his answer.

>Ask if Japan exists.

>Look at the weird kid asking if people would sign a petition to legalize dog and human sex.

>Don’t do playing’s suggestion.

>Absolutely don't do Playing's suggestion.

> contact farnaz eshnaashari-charmatz

>Do Playing's suggestion only.

> find Playing_with_boy and banish them to tartarus

ok can we stop with the dog thing now?

Edited by VXXXN on Sep 18th 2019 at 11:44:52 PM

>Banish Playing to the Trash Heap.

> Stop talking about Playing's suggestion and just move on with the game already, for the love of God.

>Actually, banish him to Tartarus instead.

>Find where the Tropers (the series) are

> Break out of the meta examples by asking Fitz to recommend a new game to play.

>Call on the mystical spirit of Tre to do his updating duties.

> Call on the mystical spirit of Tre to do his updating duties.

For a brief moment, your perspective changes, and you are now Tre, an Internet user and the author of this story. You’re surprised that folks have taken a genuine interest in it, as you feel like many things you try yourself end up crashing and burning in one way or another.

When you come back to catch up on the submitted commands, they’re... a bit of a mess, but you understood that this was always going to be a possibility. So it goes.

> find Playing_with_boy and banish them to tartarus/Tartarus

You’re... not sure you hold that kind of power, honestly. This is your game, granted, but it’s not like you can prevent people from taking part. All you can do is hope for the best, and maybe politely ask for the readers to maybe try to keep the game from going off the rails. This is a team effort, after all.

With that, you crack your knuckles in that weird way where you press your fingertips together, and get the next update rolling as our metaphorical camera snaps back into Felix at the dance game with MaRTINa.

> Take the tickets and go get a prize

You look at the console under the “Whatcha Listenin’ To” machine’s screen to try to find the tickets, but there’s none to be found. MaRTINa notices, and taps you on one of your antennae.

“There’s no ticket dispensers. They’re all loaded onto your Gingerbread Card. Peep this.”

She waves her left arm in front of her head, and in the space above it, a holographic display shows a card-like image, printed with a photo of her, her name, a title and signature, and her number of credits — 35,000, to be precise. “Try it for yourself!”

You give it a go, and yours reads:

Felix S. Verbose
“Still Figuring This Out”
400 CREDITS
“⌘”

It’s rather nifty. The card fades from view as you shift your arm back down.

You join Fitz and start heading toward the redemption cabinet, and MaRTINa tags along once she recognizes your travel guide. “Fitzy! How the hell are ya?”

“You know, doing decent. Showing this laddie the ropes. Or are you a lassie? Where are my manners, I never asked, huh?”

You give a resounding shrug. You’ve got a vague idea of genders, but for the most part you’re not particularly concerned with what yours is.

Once you reach the cabinet, you find a couple of different trinkets and plush toys — one shaped like a peanut with a red and blue headband catches your eye for a second — but on the top shelf, you see a circular plate, imprinted with a geometric pattern cutting the outside into a set of thirds with a ring in the center. It’s red, and yellow, and green, and blue in the middle.

There’s something candylike about it. You’re mesmerized.

And then you see the price: 1 million credits. Dang.

You point to it and ask what it could be. “Oh, you’ve got your eyes on a Browser. Those things can take you basically anywhere you could ever dream of, but I’ve never met anyone with enough coin to get one,” Fitz says.

Edited by Tre on Sep 21st 2019 at 9:30:49 AM

> Ask if a world exists outside the Arcade.

“There’s a whole universe out there, but it’s a bit hard to get around without something like one of those,” Fitz replies. “Or, y’know, hyperlinks.”

“This kid’ll go nuts trying to understand those, Fitzy, you know that.”

You’re intrigued, though, and you ask what they do. “They’ll take you from one fixed point to another. You gotta know the right places to travel through ‘em without a browser, but you can kinda get the hang of ‘em once you’re around here long enough. They can look like any object, too — doors, holes, arcade machines. It’s rather wicked.”

> Ask if Japan exists.

“Well, sure,” MaRTINa says. “A bit far from here, but I bet you could probably stumble your way there with the right knowledge.”

“Our city’s got a whole anime and manga district too, but it’s a little intense,” Fitz says. “Lotsa arguments about power levels. Bad vibes.”

> And when Fitz answers, ponder the philosophical implications of his answer.

You must’ve made your way through one of these hyperlinks when you got in, you ponder, and then through another one when Fitz took you into the first machine. You imagine that going in and out of them for you is kinda like how a taffy machine pulls the candy really far out on one side before taking shape again on the other side.

You’re not sure how you knew about that, but it’s in your head now. Back at the counter, you exchange five credits for a piece of green taffy. It tastes kinda horrible.

> Find where the Tropers (the series) are

Your companions take you past an aisle with a couple of games printed with intricate decor on the cabinets — one has a print of a large but small spaceship on the side, while another has various Pokémon on the cover. One with a rainbow-colored, hand-drawn logo beams among them. It’s oddly tall for a cabinet, but you clamber to the controls with the step ladder built into the bottom of its frame, and with a deep inhale, you hit the side buttons, popping yourself in.

You end up inside a mayor’s office for a sec, but tensions are kinda high, it seems. You yeet on out of there as soon as you can.

Edited by Tre on Sep 21st 2019 at 9:32:28 AM

> Think about places you've always wanted to go, and if it would be possible to reach them or places similar to them through any of these hyperlinks.

Look for the next game to get tickets from

> go crazy for yourself

Edited by VXXXN on Sep 19th 2019 at 2:13:07 AM

> Ask the judge what's happening

> Wander away delirious from the sensory overload

> Pass out, have plot-relevant dream.