Guy looks up at the person and try’s to clean himself up, moving his messy gray hair to one side and removing the trash on his suit before making eye contact with the person and says “Well have you hear about my business called Guy Electronics”
Edited by This on Dec 8th 2021 at 8:51:50 AM
"It's Thane! Whack him!"As the hooded figure finally approaches the residence of the Tropers, they notice, hallelujah! A seal is holding the door open for him! He doesn't recall there being any seals in the cast of Tropers: The Series, but pinnipeds are hardly the strangest thing to have graced the show, are they? He holds the still-dazed Kafka up in the air, hoping their recognition of a "friend" might help his case.
"Tropers of Tropesburg! Terribly sorry to interrupt..." He glances over the scene. "Whatever this is supposed to be, but I have terrible news - and an offer to make!"
Hail majestic corporate light, heaven born and ever bright!As the man walks in holding Kaf, announcing his deal, Knife walks in and pushes him aside. Guys. Awful news, some guy in a trash can just caused a city building to blow up, I was looking FOWARD to blowing it up myself...hey, who's that hooded dude?"
and the public won't dwell on my transmission cause it wasn't televised.The other seal pokes their head out the door with the bowl and looks at the hooded figure. "Oh, look, Death!"
"Nah, he hasn't got the voice for it. I bet he's some sort of secret agent." They glance at the figure with suspicion. "You're not from the Moldovan government, are you?"
Edited by aPod-ofSeals on Apr 2nd 2021 at 9:25:30 AM
Data is imaginary. This burrito is real.Elena aims her flamethrower as she looks at the hooded figure up and down "Oh, I thought you were one of Baguette Corp's people. Is you offer a partnership? Toast Co needs partners! Just sign here" She hands a document to the figure
Edited by ElenaOkami on Apr 2nd 2021 at 3:37:55 PM
Ever put tea in a coffee mug? Or coffee in a tea mug?Harper and Harper procure a lamp from nowhere and shine it in the figure's face. They then start firing off questions at the hooded figure, all in the same accusatory tone. "Who are you? Who do you work for? What have you seen? What have you heard? What have you eaten? You see a turtle upside-down in the desert and do nothing, how do you feel? When will you stop beating your wife? Are you married? What is your mother's maiden name? What is two plus two? What is your quest? What is your favorite color? Can Senator Harper Sealy, that's them right there, count on your support during the Republocrat primaries? What is your relationship with your mother? Do you feel lucky? Do ya, punk? Do you speak Romanian? Is it true that you learned Romanian specifically to prepare for the oncoming Moldovan invasion? What do you know about the Milkman? Would you like a food?" With the last question, Harper jabs the bowl of "food" aggressively at the figure.
Data is imaginary. This burrito is real."So, uh... you buying that or not, buddy?"
The man in the classic rock vest looks up from his philosophical contemplation of the green can of "Coke Infinite". The pimply youth at the counter of the convenience store blinks at the intensity of his expression. He just wants his paycheck, man, why's this town gotta be so full of weirdos?
"Hm. This... Coke Infinite. I have not seen it elsewhere."
"It's, uh, Tropesburg only. Mayor Forever's the only government leader in the world who didn't classify it as a biohazard. Mayor Badger's thinking of marketing it as part of local culture."
The man clasps his free hand in triumph.
"The drink of power unimaginable... then it is true. This Tropesburg truly is the prophesied town. The place where my considerable power will, at last, be unleashed upon this unsuspecting world. From here... I shall build a new reality."
"Cool, buddy. So you gonna buy it?"
The man laughs heartily.
"Of course I'm buying it! I have all the money I could ever want! But my true desires are far beyond what mere cash can obtain... anyway! As thanks for your role in establishing my brave new world, I shall give you this token of my gratitude!"
The pimply youth has a lapel pin of a green moth shoved in his face before he can comprehend what's going on. As he stares at it in confusion, the man in the vest slams a single US dollar onto the counter.
"Uh... thanks, I guess? So does the guy who's clearly hyping himself up as my new overlord have a name?"
"Well, of course! Soon, it is one you shall hear from the lips of every person who walks this Earth, united in a chorus of praise! But I shall humour you. You shall be the first citizen of Tropesburg to know of it. My name is-"
"Kafka!" the fox blearily manages. "'S me! Kafka!" Her voice is distinctly more feminine than the Tropers would recall, but it's still recognisably hers.
The hooded figure's blink is somehow perceptible despite their concealed face.
"Dear God! Clearly you've been afflicted by a terrible memory erasing curse! However will you defeat the great evil that is fast approaching in this state?!"
Hail majestic corporate light, heaven born and ever bright!"Oh, hey Kaf. You look different, you going through an emo phase?
They head to the kitchen, and chug some Coke Infinite from the fridge. Anyways then, are you the one who bought this hooded dude talking about good and evil and that shit?
and the public won't dwell on my transmission cause it wasn't televised.

"Did she cook it? Or was it served cold?"
Meanwhile, the other Harper closes the door, reasoning that holding it open isn't going to make plot happen any faster, and besides, do they really want to be standing right there when it does happen?
Data is imaginary. This burrito is real.