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"Don't be bigoted, Playing."
Wait! Please do! Use computers as a scapegoat for everything you dislike!
"I'll scape a goat on your ass if you don't watch it."
A jolt of laughter hits Libre, which puts pain on his nasal cavities.
Edited by SomeLibre on Jan 17th 2021 at 7:15:19 PM
"I'll show you pain in your nasal cavity," I say, pulling out a vial of fluid marked with an image of a coronavirus.
Settle down, folks! Fighting will disqualify you!
Well, except in the cage match, but that's only on Christmas specials.
Anyway, we're almost finished preparing for the next challenge!
Edited by madface7 on Jan 17th 2021 at 12:49:11 PM
"Is it to post in the Trash Heap?"
“Well, now I know how people felt when those Twin Tower jokes were made in 1995.”
(Cut to a technical difficulties card.) "We apologise for the interruption, but one of our working technicians spilled a frappuccino all over the control panel. As soon as we get the mess cleared and inspect the controls to make sure nothing is damaged, we will work to get the program back on. Thank you for your patience."
Edited by EeveeGirlChey on Jan 17th 2021 at 3:31:49 AM
Bobbit worm: Tropers are preparing, please watch warmly.
The Canned Laughter Machine makes the noise most commonly associated with failure in the Touhou games (pichuun), as a means of disapproval over the pause screen phrase.
Edited by SomeLibre on Feb 28th 2021 at 3:06:13 AM
<Public service announcement by the moderators of this world>
Moved the thread from the Forum Games forum to the Role Playing forum as requested by the OP.
You may now carry on.
The screen crackles back to the show.
...what the hell was that? Meh, whatever. Anyways... we now present our FINAL GIGANTIC CHALLENGE...
The back walls fall down and reveal a gigantic obstacle course over a pit of lava, with whirring sawblades, sharks, bear traps, sumo wrestlers, zombies, oil slicks, banana peels, spinning bars made entirely of fire, spikes, lasers, sleeping tigers, poisonous blow darts, slime monsters, dinosaurs, cackling witches, gorillas, bodybuilders, maniacal clowns, poison ivy, and worst of all... a movie theater that ONLY PLAYS ROB SCHNEIDER FILMS.
THE 🅱AUNTLET OF 🅱RAGEDY!
...WHAT THE FUCK
...I can do it.
This course is no match for me, the grrrrreat Dr. Robotnik!
If I don't survive this, send a ham to email@example.com. Thanks, and have fun.
"This is look... very extreme. But... I can clear! Ha ha ha!"
"Ohh, I think this is that mayoral rite of passage they got rid of just before I came in. I was wondering what happened to it exactly."
Sherson stares at the obstacle course with a look of slowly dawning comprehension. What is it taking him so long to comprehend? Who knows, it's Sherson D. Pringles IV.
Edited by SomeLibre on Jan 22nd 2021 at 6:05:47 PM
I see it's going to be one of THOSE challenges...good thing I packed something just in case.
Coleberry lays a copper, riveted suitcase on the ground and opens it. As soon as it is open, a mechanism inside starts whirring as the suitcase is transformed into a steampunk power armour, which Coleberry then climbs inside.
He looks ridiculous.
Try and stop me now, do-gooders!
"Hey! That's cheating!" Zanreo yells.
"If this allows, maybe to use some of own..." CATS says upon seeing that.
Edited by Zanreo on Jan 22nd 2021 at 12:22:48 PM
It's only cheating if you don't bribe the host first! Coleberry says, taking off through the gauntlet.
There's no rule in the rulebook that says he can't do that. Bobby shrugs.
"Now I wish I brought some of my own..." Zanreo says. "Anyway, better get going!" she says as she starts making her way through.
"Aw shit, here we go again"
"...yes! I understand now! The Taco Badger campaign, fearing that the public will be swayed by the, ah, incredible intelligence I displayed during the quiz round-"
Cut to a close-up of Sherson's tax form. The word "TAXES" covers every square inch.
"-has set up this death course to make a fool of me! Or kill me! Or perhaps even make a fool of me, ah, as I die! Well, I won't stand for it!"
He marches up to a saw blade, oozing an unwarranted sense of authority.
"You there! Deadly metal weapon! As your rightful mayor-elect, I, ah, command you to stop spinning!"
The saw blade does not listen, and keeps spinning. Sherson grows annoyed.
"I see how it is! A filthy Badger supporter refusing to accept defeat, are you? Well, I, ah, will not stand for this insubordination!"
He thrusts his arms forwards purposefully.
Said arm continues forwards purposefully for several meters, before skidding to a bloodstained halt on the floor. Sherson, now one-armed, blinks in confusion.
"Confound it! The Badger campaign has, ah, stolen my arm! Was stealing my votes not enough?"
Edited by DubhKafkaesque on Jan 22nd 2021 at 1:50:38 PM
"According to this dastardly evil vote-stealer, no!"
"Okay the mechanical obstacles are one thing, wha-you can time it, but the living ones?"
As Libre reaches the oil slick and fire bars...
"THE FREAK! So the oil is that slippery!?"
"(probably better to not react to whatever those dudes, animals and creatures are doing...)"
Just when he's close to the movie theater...
"I think I'll just sleep through the film...(scratches nose and blood falls off) OHHH CRAP! (overly loud yelling) CAN I GET OUT OF THIS COURSE!?? MY NOSE IS BLEEDING AND I DON'T WANNA IMPEDE ANYONE ELSE. IT'S NOT LIFE-THREATENING IT'S JUST I'M SHIT AT PATCHING UP MY RUPTURED NASAL VEINS."
Immediately a non-neglegible amount of blood starts staining the course's floor where he's standing at, unfortunately located a bit close to the theater...
Edited by SomeLibre on Jan 23rd 2021 at 4:42:15 PM
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