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Epic Failure Game

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Jaxfirebus Going to die from On the bus Relationship Status: Non-Canon
Going to die
Mar 25th 2017 at 12:32:49 PM Crap... why'd i let HIM drive?!
StarAndroidJaguar ... from some body once told me Relationship Status: In another castle
...
Mar 25th 2017 at 12:40:25 PM

You get banned by the mods for the resulting paradox.

I try to fix a machine.

back door
Jaxfirebus Going to die from On the bus Relationship Status: Non-Canon
Going to die
Mar 25th 2017 at 12:59:23 PM

You get fatally electrocuted.

I try to watch Television

Crap... why'd i let HIM drive?!
CenturyEye Tell Me, Have You Seen the Yellow Sign? from I don't know where the Yith sent me this time... Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Tell Me, Have You Seen the Yellow Sign?
Mar 25th 2017 at 2:06:38 PM

It works...so well that your neighbors find you on your Laz-E Boy chair two weeks later, what's left of your eyes still trained on the TV. They also find a fully stocked kitchen right behind you.

I try to find buried treasure at the beach.

edited 25th Mar '17 2:08:27 PM by CenturyEye

Look with century eyes... With our backs to the arch And the wreck of our kind We will stare straight ahead For the rest of our lives
anza_sb going in here was a mistake from nowhere Relationship Status: I only want you gone
going in here was a mistake
Mar 25th 2017 at 5:11:20 PM

You end up digging in the beach so much that the coast erodes away. Great job.

I quack.

tumut
vjoi We are cat & wolf!
We are cat & wolf!
Mar 25th 2017 at 5:51:33 PM

is your attempt to quack you somehow meow instead.

I study and learn real magic.

Mar 25th 2017 at 7:27:39 PM

You accidentally put a curse on yourself.

I use precognition as a contestant on The Price Is Right.

aNinjaWithAIDS Her softness must be rated 9999 as well. from Royal Gyrdorea Adventurers' Academy Relationship Status: Hooked on a feeling
Her softness must be rated 9999 as well.
Mar 26th 2017 at 12:54:36 AM

The only thing you forsee is another contestant's Double Showcase win at the end of the show.

I make a Rube Goldberg Device operated by dominoes and marbles.

edited 26th Mar '17 12:54:45 AM by aNinjaWithAIDS

I'll just put on some mood music for these two and their little moment here.
StarAndroidJaguar ... from some body once told me Relationship Status: In another castle
anza_sb going in here was a mistake from nowhere Relationship Status: I only want you gone
going in here was a mistake
Mar 26th 2017 at 4:34:28 PM

You end up being the sub instead.

...what do you mean, "not that kind of dominating"?


I try to fail.

[up] NOOOOOOO!!!

edited 27th Mar '17 4:36:34 AM by anza_sb

tumut
aNinjaWithAIDS Her softness must be rated 9999 as well. from Royal Gyrdorea Adventurers' Academy Relationship Status: Hooked on a feeling
Her softness must be rated 9999 as well.
Mar 26th 2017 at 6:50:25 PM

Your attempt at failure is such a failure, it creates a Reality-Breaking Paradox onto yourself that Retgones you.

I try to clean my room.

I'll just put on some mood music for these two and their little moment here.
CyberController World's cutest (and most psychotic) god. Relationship Status: I don't mind being locked in this eternal maze!
World's cutest (and most psychotic) god.
Mar 26th 2017 at 7:12:31 PM

You end up throwing away all your possessions, except for the trash.

I try to cut my hair.

Gridman is nice. Wait, is that someone familiar?
TroperNo9001 Special Agent Fluttershy from Sweet Feather Sanctuary Relationship Status: Brony
Special Agent Fluttershy
Mar 26th 2017 at 7:53:16 PM

All of your hair falls out from just one careless snip. Time to get a wig, or some hair growth potion or something.

I try to get out of bed.

"Oh... um... Happy Egg Day, I guess..."
vjoi We are cat & wolf!
We are cat & wolf!
Mar 26th 2017 at 9:05:20 PM

you get eaten after realizing that most children claim to have a monster under there for a reason.

I try to rob a bank.

anza_sb going in here was a mistake from nowhere Relationship Status: I only want you gone
going in here was a mistake
Mar 26th 2017 at 11:37:59 PM

You ended up only stealing 1 cent. And you're still sentenced in jail for attempted robbery.

I try to stop procrastinating and finish my task at hand!

tumut
TheSilverShroud Smol snek from Rorikstead Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Smol snek
Mar 26th 2017 at 11:39:26 PM

You finish the task but it ends up being sub-par.

I try to summon a demon

Ocean Man. Take me by the hand, lead me to the land. That you understand.
kouta Everything's gonna happy! from the details Relationship Status: Tsundere'ing
Everything's gonna happy!
Mar 27th 2017 at 3:26:02 AM

Congratulations! You summoned, but failed to bind, Ligier and he's not happy with you.

I fillibuster the US Senate for four straight days.

I am a proper young lady who does not bite her father at the dinner table. My relaxing music playlist.
Jaxfirebus Going to die from On the bus Relationship Status: Non-Canon
Going to die
Mar 27th 2017 at 10:36:48 PM

They scream 'Get on with it' and kick you out, you tumble down all the steps and break your neck.

I try to use paradoxes against a rouge AI

Crap... why'd i let HIM drive?!
StarAndroidJaguar ... from some body once told me Relationship Status: In another castle
...
Mar 28th 2017 at 2:32:23 AM

The AI in question: Ummm... TRUE. I'll go TRUE.

I try to make the entire internet SFW.

back door
CenturyEye Tell Me, Have You Seen the Yellow Sign? from I don't know where the Yith sent me this time... Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Tell Me, Have You Seen the Yellow Sign?
Mar 28th 2017 at 3:29:14 AM

The internet blinks out after losing its purpose, instantly annihilating combined trillions of hours of work and countless bits of knowledge. The resulting backlash instantly knocks humanity back to the stone age. And cave dwellers still draw NSFW stick figures on the cave walls.

I try a case in court.

edited 28th Mar '17 3:30:18 AM by CenturyEye

Look with century eyes... With our backs to the arch And the wreck of our kind We will stare straight ahead For the rest of our lives
anza_sb going in here was a mistake from nowhere Relationship Status: I only want you gone
going in here was a mistake
Mar 28th 2017 at 3:35:45 AM

You tried the case. It's rather hard to chew on, but you managed to do it anyway. It tasted like leather and important papers. You are charged for damage of personal property.

I try to make noodles.

tumut
kouta Everything's gonna happy! from the details Relationship Status: Tsundere'ing
Everything's gonna happy!
Mar 31st 2017 at 6:50:06 PM

You attempt to use a broken coffee maker to make the boiled water. It catches on fire.

I attempt to esacpe a fluorine-metal fire without running shoes.

edited 31st Mar '17 6:51:20 PM by kouta

I am a proper young lady who does not bite her father at the dinner table. My relaxing music playlist.
StarAndroidJaguar ... from some body once told me Relationship Status: In another castle
...
Apr 1st 2017 at 1:42:38 PM

You die as soon as it occurs, owing to Stuff Blowing Up and Deadly Gas.

I try to tame a supernatural animal.

back door
CenturyEye Tell Me, Have You Seen the Yellow Sign? from I don't know where the Yith sent me this time... Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Tell Me, Have You Seen the Yellow Sign?
Apr 1st 2017 at 2:05:02 PM

It works. It fetches, sits, and gets you the newspaper. Unfortunately, its here because you're a participant in a supernatural tournament—no they didn't ask you—and all that time you spent taming was supposed to be for training a ferocious competitor.
No, you're not an Ordinary High-School Student. Your that blissfully unaware participant, with no plot armor, who is promptly eaten roughly 1.4 picoseconds after walking out your front door on what looks like a normal day. Your supernatural animal is swallowed whole soon after by another (much bigger) supernatural animal.

I try to chase down a single wounded fighter with a hundred soldiers backing me up.

edited 1st Apr '17 2:06:06 PM by CenturyEye

Look with century eyes... With our backs to the arch And the wreck of our kind We will stare straight ahead For the rest of our lives
BearyScary from A Planet That Looks Like It Has Chameleons Relationship Status: What's love got to do with it?
Apr 2nd 2017 at 1:59:12 AM

You mistakenly pick up an enemy soldier and bring him back. No one knows what to do with him now.

I tried to catch up on You Tube videos.


Total posts: 314
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