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Weird fanfiction disclaimers you've seen

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Ominae Since: Jul, 2010
#1: Sep 30th 2014 at 4:36:41 AM

Can be anything from the hilarious to the outright weird.

I've yet to see one though.

IchigoPockyChama from my new account Since: Dec, 2013
#2: Sep 30th 2014 at 4:40:59 AM

Naruto owns Masashi Kishimoto, not me.

[lol]

Ominae Since: Jul, 2010
#3: Oct 5th 2014 at 1:23:58 AM

Found this interesting, which gave me a chuckle:

As much as I would love to, I do not, nor do I ever forsee myself, own Oreimo or Sword Art Online. They are the properties of their respective owners. I am just borrowing their works to fulfill my own desires.

KarkatTheDalek Not as angry as the name would suggest. from Somwhere in Time/Space Since: Mar, 2012 Relationship Status: You're a beautiful woman, probably
Not as angry as the name would suggest.
#4: Oct 5th 2014 at 1:39:56 AM

I have not read this one, and furthermore don't intend to, but from The Prayer Warriors...

I do not own the Bible, God does. I will not feel sorry for using Percy Jackson as it is evil and should not have a disclaimer.

edited 5th Oct '14 1:41:09 AM by KarkatTheDalek

Oh God! Natural light!
FalconPain Since: Feb, 2015
#5: Oct 23rd 2014 at 12:31:21 PM

When I think of weird fanfiction disclaimers, the first thing I think of was a Neon Genesis Evangeleon crossover with Slayers that was MSTed by Elmer Studios. Lengthy irrelevant scenes that existed solely to have the disclaimer warning as the punchline.

Which led to a nice meta-example in one of the later parts on their site. Warning: Contains Disclaimer

phantom1 Since: Dec, 2009 Relationship Status: Chocolate!
#6: Oct 29th 2014 at 7:39:23 PM

I remember a Hetalia fandom one that said "[the author] will not own any of the country characters until [she] finally rules the world" or something to that effect it was fairly amusing, and I think comes from the absurdity of writing I don't own country name. I can't remember the exact quote.

Noaqiyeum we must dissent (it/they) from across the gulf of space (Time Abyss) Relationship Status: Arm chopping is not a love language!
we must dissent (it/they)
#7: Oct 31st 2014 at 9:04:12 PM

The disclaimers on A Sarcastic Git's Golden Rules at Hogwarts amused me.

I own nothing but my own twisted little brain... you can't have that, I don't care how good your lawyer is.

Harry Potter isn't mine. And, thanks to Rebecca Ann Black, neither is Fred Weasley.

-tumbleweed rolls over disclaimer-
-reader forced to fill in the blanks all by themselves-

Despite ardent and repeated requests, J. K. Rowling has still refused to give me the rights to Harry Potter. Shocking, I know.

And eventually,

Everybody is nice and clear on the fact that I don't own Harry Potter? Everyone will remember this for the following chapters? Good. Because I'm sick of repeating it and trying to be amusing.

ERROR: The current state of the world is unacceptable. Save anyway? YES/NO
Unknownlight Since: Aug, 2009
#8: Oct 31st 2014 at 9:40:10 PM

I own [x]. Yes, really.

The first time I saw that joke, I thought it was really funny, but then it got old as I saw it spread from author to author.

SaintDeltora The Mistress from The Land Of Corruption and Debauchery Since: Aug, 2012 Relationship Status: I'm just high on the world
The Mistress
#10: Dec 10th 2014 at 11:50:16 AM

"Kiritsugu Emiya died at the conclusion of the Fourth Grail War. But not before offering himself to the World in exchange for summoning someone capable of preventing another such disaster. Now summoned as Counter Guardian EMIYA during the Fifth Grail War, the gun-slinging Archer continues on his path of killing people to save people. Summary is awesome but story sucks."

It's those last few words that get me.

"Please crush me with your heels Esdeath-sama!
Thunderchin Since: Aug, 2011
#11: Dec 10th 2014 at 11:51:33 AM

[up] But it is a clever bit of reverse psychology, eh? It sure made me want to read it.

Arcee6 Intellectual Rock Star from Wales, UK Since: Sep, 2013 Relationship Status: Above such petty unnecessities
Intellectual Rock Star
#13: Feb 19th 2015 at 2:07:58 PM

"Transformers, GI Joe and Jem and the Holograms are all copyright Hasbro. I am not making money or gaining any form of compensation from this story beyond the satisfaction of having written it. I do not own ANY of the properties mentioned anywhere in this story. Not even Burgerville, though I do like to have lunch there every now and then."

That last bit just makes me smile.

RIP Leonard Nimoy 26/03/1931 - 27/02/2015
AegisP Kindhearted SSSSSNAKE Man Since: Oct, 2014 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
Kindhearted SSSSSNAKE Man
#14: Feb 21st 2015 at 11:26:13 PM

That Fate/Stay Night fic summary joke is so awesome. Definitely wish more put more effort like that.

But its weird, in another thread we were just talking about how awesome would a "Summary is awesome, Story Sucks " label would be.

As long as this flower is in my heart. My Strength will flow without end.
Ominae Since: Jul, 2010
#15: Jun 9th 2015 at 10:27:35 PM

Found this:

"Usual disclaimer: I don't own it. Not FF Tactics, not the characters, not the setting, nothing. And you probably don't either. And if you do, uh, that's cool but what are you doing here? You're kinda scaring me."

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