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You choke on it and die.
You get crushed, buried by the collapsing building.
I order pizza.
The pizza was dosed with mutagenic serum that multiplies the fat you get from the pizza, so everybody points and laughs at you.
I was the one who sabotaged the above troper's pizza.
Shot by living pizza for eating her father.
I haven't posted in a while.
Edited by Superjohn on Feb 23rd 2020 at 6:18:37 AM
Too bad you're legally required to post often. You're locked up in jail.
You grow fat and everyone laughs at you.
I ate a fairy in RPG Maker MV.
You are turned into a fairy and teleported . . . To a country well known for considering fairies to be "Exotic Snacks"
I still haven't started my Chinese language learning Corse I bought.
The Mafia terminate your employment as their translator to the Chinese. Your severance package is a pair of Cement Shoes.
I stepped on somebody's toes.
Cue the Giant Foot of Stomping.
I (unsuccessfully attempt to) kill this thread.
Edited by StarAndroidJaguar on May 20th 2020 at 9:10:21 AM
time TO INFORM THE NEXT OF YOUR KIN! TO THE DUNGEON, FOR A BILLION BAZILLION YEAAARS!
i bought a hat.
You contract mercury poisoning.
You coffee is ridiculously hot and you drop it on yourself on the way out of the coffee store on accident, giving you 3rd degree burns on your legs and feet, you freak out and trip and fall onto the ground, hitting your temple and killing you.
I open my birthday presents
The presents were all marked "Do not open until your birthday" and you opened them prematurely. They all contain digital cameras rigged to take a picture of your face as soon as you open the box and one other thing each. The pictures are emailed with their timestamps to a lawyer, specifically the executor of Mr. Muldoon's estate, who now knows EXACTLY when you opened the boxes. The first box you open contains, behind the camera, an additional part of Mr. Muldoon's last will and testament, that states that if you open the presents on or after your birthday, you are bequeathed a lifetime supply of ice cream, one crate of his next-finest whiskey, and one boot to the head. But if you open the presents BEFORE your birthday (which you just did), you forfeit that bequeathment and instead get a series of boots to the head and a hungry (not rabid or it would have died by now) Tasmanian Devil to be placed in your trousers. Sure enough, the rest of the presents contain spring-loaded boots and the springs release immediately after the cameras in front of the boots take the pictures they were rigged to take. Mr. Muldoon's lawyer shows up to deliver the hungry Tasmanian Devil into your pants.
I tied Awe921's shoelaces together and ginsengaddict's shoeshoelaces together and made ginsengaddict spill the coffee because buying a hat or a coffee is not a misdemeanor.
Edited by Miss_Desperado on May 21st 2020 at 10:21:23 AM
awe921 gets up and ties you in a giant shoelace, tripping you into the depths of a hellish volcano... of COFFEE! BOILING HOT COFFEE!
i step on a cat's tail.
Edited by Awe921 on May 22nd 2020 at 4:23:16 AM
The tail is shoved up your ass.
I downvoted a post without explaining my criticism.
I downvote every single one of your posts, frame you for something that gets your account banned, then track you down and brand a giant downvote onto your body.
I cheat on a single player game.
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