I was researching Jason Mraz since he wrote Zac Brown Band's latest single, "Jump Right In". The rest of Mraz's "I'm Yours" seems fine, but this line is pure WTF:
I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer
But my breath fogged up the glass And so I drew a new face and I laughed
Also, the third verse to "Where I Come From" by Alan Jackson. The rest of the song is, despite some dodgy rhymes, a decent story of a truck driver ending up in various Northern towns and stating how they're not like his hometown:
I was chasin' sun on 101
Somewhere around Ventura
I lost a universal joint
And I had to use my finger
This tall lady stopped and asked
If I had plans for dinner
Said, "No thanks, ma'am, back home
We like the girls that sing soprano"
First of all, "use my finger" is the most awkward way to say hitchhiking that I've ever heard. And the "girls that sing soprano" line seems unnaturally sexist.
Speaking of, Alan did "I'm a country boy, I got a four wheel drive / Climb in my bed, I'll take you for a ride". Which is a really bald-faced single entendre that is way out of character for him — his material is, outsid these examples, never sexist or macho.
edited 30th Apr '13 12:38:36 AM by Twentington
I remember the first time I listened to "Eye of Fatima (Part One)" by Camper Van Beethoven, I thought most of the song kind of made sense in a bit of an abstract way. I even rolled with the part about cowboys on acid being like Egyptian cartoons because when I try to imagine a cowboy on acid, it seems like it would be a surreal sight. Then I heard the line "And no one ever conquered Wyoming from the left or from the right" and to this day I still have no idea what that line has to do with anything.
edited 30th Apr '13 7:17:24 AM by FingerPuppet
Led Zeppelin's "Dancing Days" is a normal song about taking a girl on a date except for this very strange line: "I saw a lion, he was standing alone with a tadpole in a jar." WTF?
Emerson Lakeand Palmer's "Still...You Turn Me On" is a serious romantic ballad, but then comes this line: "Every day a little sadder, a little madder/ someone get me a ladder" (I found out about this example from the Narm.Music page.)
Bon Jovi's "Bed of Roses" is a cheesy yet enjoyable romantic ballad, but this line makes me chuckle every time I here it: "With an ironclad fist I wake up and French kiss the morning." Purple Prose much? The whole song is melodramatic, but that line overdramatic ever for this song.
Def Leppard's "Pour Some Sugar on Me" is WordSalad-y, but none of the lyrics are too out there, except for this line: "Livin' like a lover with a radar phone." I originally misheard the words radar phone as "red hot thong", which would have made a lot for sense.
Muse's "Muscle Museum" has the line "I have played in every toilet". I think he means that the band had to play at some crappy places when it started up, but it's hard to tell that from the context of the song, so it just sounds weird.
edited 30th Apr '13 8:43:45 PM by djbj
I think I mentioned in the mondegreen thread how I was convinced I had to be hearing that line from "Dancing Days" wrong. Also, I think part of the weirdness of the Muse lyric is cultural - in England, "toilet" can refer to the bathroom as a whole, but if you're used to the American sense of the word you might end up imagining Matt Bellamy being physically inside of a toilet bowl.
"A House Is Not A Motel" by Love has the opening lines "At my house I've got no shackles / you can come and look if you want to" - I think in context that is supposed to mean something along the lines of "In my home I am free from society's constraints, and do not impose those constraints on my friends or visitors"... But I can't be the only one who hears that right at the beginning of a song and thinks of it as a Suspiciously Specific Denial. Oh, and of course "Live And Let Live" starts with "Oh, the snot has caked against my pants / it has turned into crystal", but that's supposed to be a funny, jarring lyric.
edited 30th Apr '13 9:17:46 PM by MikeK
The very last line of "Wisdom" by the Brian Jonestown Massacre. The rest of the song is this really nice love song, full of sweet lyrics. And then the final line is, "And I'll get my way or I'm going to kill you."
X-Men X-Pert, my blog where I talk about X-Men comics.This actually happened while a flatmate and I were listening to Sufjan Stevens' "I Want to Be Well".
Nate: Whoa, did he actually say...?
Sufjan: I'm not fucking around / I'm not, I'm not
Nate: He said it again!
And Nate was just vocalizing what I had thought the first time I heard the song. Sufjan wasn't quite the last musician I expected to drop that bomb, but he was pretty close.
I'll also add "Samson" by Regina Spektor. A nice, pretty, melancholic song based on the story of Samson and Delilah, and then she throws out the line, "Ate a slice of Wonder Bread then came right back to bed." That line actually bothers me, because it just feels so out of place. It's otherwise so pretty, and then that just sucks me out of the story she's telling.
X-Men X-Pert, my blog where I talk about X-Men comics.
That actually made me laugh out loud
I just remembered the first time I listened to "Lord Only Knows" by Beck and this happened to me twice during it. First there's the scream it starts with that caught me off guard after the previous track, "Hotwax," faded out with a really quiet section. After that yell, I thought, "Wait, you mean that was the intro to a country song?" Also, while I'm used to Beck's lyrics being surreal and nonsensical, I wasn't expecting the outro during which he sings, "Going back to Houston, do the hot dog dance / Going back to Houston to get me some pants."
edited 1st May '13 3:47:40 AM by FingerPuppet
@Meta Four: That whole section is brilliant almost solely on the strength of that line as a statement in and of itself. By saying that he's "not fucking around" in those exact words, you know that he isn't.
Then again, given that All Delighted People and The Age Of Adz felt very much like a kind of reinvention of Sufjan's career in the vein of his earlier, more experimental work to me—work that was often a lot more overtly lyrically abrasive and ambiguous than his material from Seven Swans on—it's not entirely shocking, just... well, dramatic. In a good way.
@Tiamatty: I think that the point of the more modern interjections into the lyrics of that particular song is to illustrate a how a fairly mundane relationship can feel mythic in the context of intense romantic love. I actually found it quite charming and extremely sad.
I'll hide your name inside a word and paint your eyes with false perception.
That actually makes sense.
And truthfully, Regina Spektor's generally weird enough that using her in this thread feels like cheating.
X-Men X-Pert, my blog where I talk about X-Men comics.Does the Blades Of Glory break in Jay-Z and Kanye's "Niggas In Paris" count?
Do not spare the feelings of those who would not spare yours.Jane Siberry: “Hockey”
“This stick was signed by Jean Belliveau, so don’t fucking tell me where to fucking go...”
Startling because she’s a genteel Canadian lady of English parentage, singing a cutesy folk song about a Canadian pastime and suddenly there’s all this swearing. She’d sometimes throw in a few extra “fucks” when she sang it live.
edited 3rd May '13 12:29:07 AM by Bananaquit
So, "Chinese Arithmetic" by Faith No More is a kind of word-salad-y but serious-sounding song that might be about some sort of love triangle. Then the bolded line shows up in the middle of a rapped bridge:
So you thought she'd be sweeter than your girlfriend Peter
Well give it a second chance cause you've yet to meet her
We got the same ideas, we got the same old fears
They're different colors sometimes, but, hey, who cares?
Just years that tears our lives apart
Just like the time that you tried to teach your cousin to fart
He couldn't do it, "push!" you told him twice
Well, I do, man, but it just don't jive
What's even stranger is those are Recycled Lyrics - the passage that starts with "we got the same ideas..." and ends with "he couldn't do it, push!" is used pretty much verbatim in "R n' R" from the same album, where it's equally out of place. Actually, in "Chinese Arithmetic" it might be "that time you tried to teach your cousin to walk" as several lyrics sites would have it, but in "R n' R" it's definitely "fart". I've kind of chalked this up to the sense of humor the band shows at times.
edited 3rd May '13 1:52:50 PM by MikeK
A minor example from Anarchy in the UK by The Sex Pistols. So I'm just playing Tony Hawk's Underground 4 and the song comes on and everything's fine. The then verse starts.
Wait, what?
Do not spare the feelings of those who would not spare yours.
Well, it's "Anarchy In The U.K.". What did you expect?
Now try to hear some of the Public Image Ltd. stuff (from the first two albums). Particularly "Fodderstompf".
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If that's something that seems out of place to you, you clearly haven't listened to the Sex Pistols
I was a 9 to 10-year-old black kid who's mom listened to Barry Manilow, Enya and various Contemporary R&B artists from the 70s to 90s. How much Sex Pistols did you think I would've heard?
Even now, the only Rock I ever go back to is Crush 40.
edited 4th May '13 4:21:09 PM by PhysicalStamina
Do not spare the feelings of those who would not spare yours.Well, most people's parents probably wouldn't exactly want their kids listening to the Sex Pistols, so I'd think a lack of parental exposure can be assumed for just about anyone

Ever hear a song where it all seems perfectly fine and as expected, but then you hear a lyric in that just make you think "...what the hell?!??"
Like, for example, take the Four Lads' song "Standing on the Corner" ("Standin' on the corner / Watchin' all the girls go by..."). Generally mundane if catchy '50s pop ditty.
And then we get to this line:
"Brother, you can't go to jail for what you're thinkin'!"
O_o
Any other examples of lyrics in songs that just make you go, "WTF?!??"
Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle.