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Laconic Description Improvement

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For a list of bad laconics, see Sandbox.Pages Needing Better Laconics.

For generally accepted guidelines for laconics, see Sandbox.Laconic Wiki Template.


Today I found out an interesting fact from troper Ironeye:

Don't ever make the mistake of using the Laconic version as the canonical trope meaning—the laconics are often written by people who don't actually understand the drop. In this case, the laconic only corresponds to one possible cause of Darkness-Induced Audience Apathy.

The Laconic Description for DIAA states as follows:

The thing is, these descriptions are supposed to make it easier to understand what the page is about. If they can't be accurate as well as short and sweet, then there's a problem.

So for starters, what would be a better description for DIAA?

Edited by MacronNotes on Jan 29th 2023 at 6:23:45 AM

wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#801: Mar 22nd 2021 at 1:23:45 PM

That'll do better, I think.

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
Vandagyre I think I just got AC team loyalty from Dacardia (Fifth Year at Tropey's) Relationship Status: Wishfully thinking
I think I just got AC team loyalty
#802: Mar 29th 2021 at 10:36:46 PM

Super Cell Reception doesn't have a laconic yet. Does this work?

Cell phones can be used to communicate in environments where they logically shouldn't.

Cave Johnson, we're done here.
MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#803: Mar 30th 2021 at 7:38:50 PM

[up]No objections on my part.

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Vandagyre I think I just got AC team loyalty from Dacardia (Fifth Year at Tropey's) Relationship Status: Wishfully thinking
I think I just got AC team loyalty
#804: Apr 3rd 2021 at 11:18:36 AM

How's this for I Am One of Those, Too?

A character invents an aspect of their background. Then someone who actually has that background starts asking them questions about it.

Cave Johnson, we're done here.
MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#805: Apr 3rd 2021 at 3:28:59 PM

Fits the concept of the trope, so go ahead.

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antenna_ears from California Since: Apr, 2020 Relationship Status: Coming soon to theaters
#806: Apr 4th 2021 at 4:56:43 PM

The laconic for No-Gear Level sounds a little complainy and is not necessarily the point of the trope:

Why make it continuously stronger enemies when you make a temporarily weaker protagonist?

The unabridged redirect is pretty cool though and can stay (I noticed it was added by a different person than the one who created the laconic).

How about:

"Challenging the player by stripping them of their hard-earned gear."

I'm not that good at writing laconics, so I'm all ears for better ideas or improvements.

Edited by antenna_ears on Apr 4th 2021 at 4:59:19 AM

MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#807: Apr 5th 2021 at 5:25:54 PM

[up]That one's good, though. If it's hard to come up with a wittier laconic, then it's best to just have one that is clear and is devoid of complaints.

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wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#808: Apr 8th 2021 at 12:23:52 PM

The Simpsons S 3 E 10 Flaming Moes has two laconics. The first one describes the plot of the episode, the second is a bit of trivia.

We can just delete the second one, right?

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#809: Apr 8th 2021 at 12:58:36 PM

I support removing the second and leaving the first.

135 -> 180 -> 273 -> 191 -> 188 -> 230 -> 300 -> 311
wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#810: Apr 11th 2021 at 9:51:58 AM

Hair Color Dissonance is another two-laconic laconic...

The second thing would be an Audience Reaction, so that's the one that goes, right?

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#811: Apr 11th 2021 at 11:09:19 AM

I support cutting the second.

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mightymewtron Word Up from New New York Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
Word Up
#812: Apr 13th 2021 at 6:00:00 AM

Angst Aversion says, "Avoiding depressing, morbid works of art by not taking the bait."

Bold inflation mine. I don't see how Schmuck Bait applies here. Angsty works aren't really a trap in the way the entry implies, plus it encourages complaining about angsty material.

I do some cleanup and then I enjoy shows you probably think are cringe.
wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#813: Apr 13th 2021 at 7:23:40 AM

Yeah just snip that phrase, the definition is already fully covered by the first half of the sentence.

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
CompletelyNormalGuy Am I a weirdo? from a place where folks put cream cheese on hot dogs (Oldest One in the Book)
Am I a weirdo?
#814: Apr 13th 2021 at 5:44:06 PM

Yeah, kill it. The only "bait" involved in angsty works is Oscar Bait.

Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.
wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#815: Apr 15th 2021 at 11:27:45 AM

Laconic.Final Girl is covering both the trope and the film, which is allowable if not ideal, but the one for the film is...................... kinda awful? Any suggestions for improvement?

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
underCoverSailsman Peeks from Under Rocks from State of Flux Since: Jan, 2021 Relationship Status: [TOP SECRET]
Peeks from Under Rocks
#816: Apr 15th 2021 at 11:59:17 AM

Yikes! It looks like an ESL issue to me. I think what it's trying to say is:

2015 psychological thriller Final Girl: The closest we'll ever get to a seriously toned Hack/Slash movie with a blonde conventionally-beautiful girl as the Serial-Killer Killer instead of a brunette goth/alt beauty.

wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#817: Apr 15th 2021 at 1:07:26 PM

I mean, I know what it's trying to say, it's just way too long, and "this work is kinda like that work" comparisons are discouraged on laconics these days.

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#818: Apr 15th 2021 at 1:55:47 PM

The laconic of Conker's Bad Fur Day is another X Meets Y sentence. My suggestion:

"Ill-mannered squirrel gets lost in his way home, and the next day he embarks on an adventure that makes him richer but also less happy"

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Delibirda from Splatsville Since: Sep, 2020 Relationship Status: I wanna be your dog
#819: Apr 16th 2021 at 6:59:07 AM

The one for Acme is pretty bad, since it is just a bad backronym, not a summary of the description.

"Listen up, Marina, because this is SUPER important. Whatever you do, don't eat th“ “DON'T EAT WHAT?! Your text box ran out of space!”
wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#820: Apr 16th 2021 at 9:20:00 AM

(Courtesy link) It's not just a backronym. "A company that makes everything needed for the plot" is the trope, and would be even if that phrase didn't conveniently spell "ACME".

This was actually discussed earlier, as a previous version of the laconic put way too much emphasis on the backronym and missed out on the trope part of the trope.

Edited by wingedcatgirl on Apr 16th 2021 at 11:20:21 AM

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
MyTimingIsOff Since: Dec, 2011
#821: Apr 18th 2021 at 3:16:55 PM

[up][up][up]Suggestion sounds good to me.

I lack any familiarity with Arcana Heart but this laconic is unacceptable.

MyFinalEdits Delete message from Parts Unknown (Spin-off Series) Relationship Status: Cast away
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#822: Apr 18th 2021 at 5:28:24 PM

[up]Yikes! Definitely a no-no! Even without the incendiary "result", the "minus balancing" part feels like a potshot at the gameplay. The whole laconic is something only a detractor of the game would have put.

I have no familiarity with the game either, but I don't think that laconic should stay around for any longer. If I had the permission to, I would cutlist it and then it can be recreated by someone who plays the game and can bring in something better for a recreation.

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WarJay77 It's NaNo, Bay-beeee! (8,356/50,000) from My Writing Cave (Troper Knight) Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
It's NaNo, Bay-beeee! (8,356/50,000)
#823: Apr 18th 2021 at 5:31:47 PM

Big surprise incoming- that page has existed since 2009. No wonder it sucks so much. Ancient TVT strikes again.

Working on: Author Appeal | Sandbox | Troper Wall
wingedcatgirl mys. minty from the silly dimension from lurking (Holding A Herring) Relationship Status: Oh my word! I'm gay!
mys. minty from the silly dimension
#824: Apr 18th 2021 at 6:36:59 PM

We don't play the game either. If nobody who does play the game comes in to help, cutlisting may be the only option. Do we have a media thread for Arcana Heart, or fighting games in general?

Suddenly I'm... still rotating Fallen London in my mind even though I've stopped actively playing it.
Wyldchyld (Old as dirt)
#825: Apr 19th 2021 at 3:22:33 AM

Regarding the request for a better laconic for Laconic.Bigger Is Better In Bed, how about this?

A work or character links a man's sexual prowess to how well-endowed he is.

If my post doesn't mention a giant flying sperm whale with oversized teeth and lionfish fins for flippers, it just isn't worth reading.

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