TVTropes Now available in the app store!
Open

Follow TV Tropes

Following

Epic Rap Battles Of Our Avatars

Go To

MrsRatched Judging you from Nowhere Since: Sep, 2011 Relationship Status: Crazy Cat Lady
Judging you
#101: Jun 4th 2014 at 3:14:38 PM

I'm a Mecha pilot, also take on a rhyme

I will crush your skull apart, when would you find the time?

I may have daddy issues inside but at least I know my father

And I can too play the piano, that's how I got your mother

Don't Fuck with me cause I decide in the end

There's a lot of you I might tang,

But it wouldn't taste good at all

Angels are my foes but to HELL I'll kick your ass

Just like that dark haired guy from my latest year class

Haw Haw Haw
Jinxmenow Ghosts N' Stuff Remix from everywhere you look, everywhere you look Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: Not caught up in your love affair
Ghosts N' Stuff Remix
#102: Jun 4th 2014 at 4:37:37 PM

It's The Engineer!

Sit down, shorty, let me school you on robotics.

I'll kick your ass in aft-crossing trajectory (aeronautics).

I sawed off my own hand, and now I'm part mechanical.

You're always so hysterical, you're like a TV serial.

You're too weak without your tech, little doggie.

Come fight mano-a-mano, get a little Justice (Frontier).

The radiation from the A-Bomb has affected your head,

and it's started you on acting kinda queer (like Kaworu!)

You keep spoutin' off about sippin' that Tang,

sitting pretty like some god on his throne (you little cocksucker),

It's such a shame you were touched by an Angel,

when you met your mom's clone, you went and tried to fuck her! (Just sick)

Sure you fought a floating pyramid, big deal, kid.

So you got in a robot; let me tell you what I did.

I got 13 Ph Ds in respectable fields,

and used it in my deadly architecture on the battlefields.

Get bent, you've been at it too long,

rapping up to every challenger, stepping up to every better.

I mean let's face it, "crush your skull apart" don't even make sense,

let me cut your name into your bones, now that's a real RED letter.

I solve practical problems. Practical is what you're not.

Why don't you move your gear up, and get in the fucking robot.

"Monsters are tragic beings. They are born too tall, too strong, too heavy. They are not evil by choice. That is their tragedy."
MicoolTNT Shadow of Legends from 'straya, m8 Since: Apr, 2012 Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
Shadow of Legends
#103: Jun 4th 2014 at 5:54:34 PM

Mami Tomoe

Oh, my, you're all so rude,

The insults and abuse come like a flood,

But now I'm here, to kick ass with courtesy and style!

Mami Tomoe, that's my name, so if you'd be so kind as to raise your game!

I'm here to stake out my claim to fame, and perhaps shatter this Barrier of lame!

What's that, Mr. Engy? You say add more gun?

Well, here, have these to add to your fun!

Don't speak to me of firepower,

For if you dare arouse my ire,

A thousand magic rifles, though one will do,

To shoot your fat ass right off the floor!

And, with the power granted to me by my dear friend Kyubey,

I'll blast you right out of town. Tiro Finale!

edited 4th Jun '14 6:03:03 PM by MicoolTNT

"We can handle what is true, for we are already living it."
MicoolTNT Shadow of Legends from 'straya, m8 Since: Apr, 2012 Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
Shadow of Legends
#104: Aug 3rd 2014 at 5:44:57 AM

Epic Rap Bump of DOOM!

"We can handle what is true, for we are already living it."
DhanaRagnarok Disturbingly mustachioed. from France. COCO-FLIPPIN'-RICO. Since: Feb, 2010 Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
Disturbingly mustachioed.
#105: Aug 3rd 2014 at 8:15:24 AM

Ginosaji

G̣͔i̮̘̩͇̟-̖͚̪̮̯͉̲N̪̹̮o-̺̰͚̼͎̻ͅS͍͙̗͈̟̦̥a̠̳̻͔-̮̣̦͎J͕͠i͉̲̘͘ͅ here, and talking for once,

To teach a lesson to a pretty little dunce!

I'm coming for you, spoon in hand,

And what' you gonna do without even a silly magic wand?

Oh you have guns maybe. I heard you have plenty.

Well ask Jack, what good they are against me! (Die goddammit!)

I'm the real unstoppable emcee,

You're a slave to your Kyubey,

I've got something else to do now,

Gotta beat ol' Cucchiaio, but before I go,

I'll beat the cuteness out of ya, you buffoon.

SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!

Well, I tried.

Look upon my R.O.U.S., ye mighty, and despair!
MicoolTNT Shadow of Legends from 'straya, m8 Since: Apr, 2012 Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
Shadow of Legends
#106: Aug 3rd 2014 at 10:55:25 PM

Happy:

So you are creepy, what else can you do?

You look like you'd go down to one shot of the flu!

Never fear, Fairy Tail's here!

It's Natsu Dragneel, so you'd better kneel!

Natsu:

Can't be shot huh? Well, at least you're that tough!

Even better for me, 'cause then I can get rough!

I'm the Fire Dragonslayer, you don't have a prayer!

Got a fire in my belly, gonna turn you to jelly!

I'ma roast you well done, since I can't just use a gun!

And I bet it will be some plenty good fun!

Better get a move on, this time's your turn to run!

edited 3rd Aug '14 10:56:44 PM by MicoolTNT

"We can handle what is true, for we are already living it."
foxmccloud4387 Since: Mar, 2011
#107: Aug 4th 2014 at 12:18:58 AM

Archer:

With an attitude like that, I'll let you know

You're somehow worse than Emiya Shirou

Steel is my body, and fire is my blood

Compared to my lethality, yours is a dud

I fight smarter and wiser than you ever will

With either bow or sword, I'll get a certain kill

I don't give a damn about your fire breath

It can't scorch me - I'm Unknown to Death

You can't measure your worth by the fire you've made

After all, it can't melt my unlimited blades

You claim to be some magical guild-type hero

But Archer's here to say that you're just a zero

But that's enough talk, it's time for us to see:

Can you keep up with me?

PhysicalStamina ain't nothin' but a party y'all (4 Score & 7 Years Ago) Relationship Status: Coming soon to theaters
ain't nothin' but a party y'all
#108: Aug 4th 2014 at 10:18:08 AM

Neptune/Purple Heart

Yo! Neptune here, and I'd like you to know
That by the time I'm done, I'll have stolen the show!
I have the best land with all the best games
The other Goddesses could never hope to match my fame!
Me and my adorable little sis, we're unstoppable
You say you wanna challenge us? You better watch it, fool!
I don't show mercy to any of my victims
They plead and they plead, but still I just hit 'em With some of this and some of that, like a thunderstorm
And now it's time to transform!

*transforms into her CPU form*

Sorry to keep you waiting, welcome to the next level
I just get a little competitive, so let's settle this
Once and for all, it's your call, to make your stand or take your fall
And you fall short, it'll be 'cause of a poor call on your part
You blowhard,
You think you're so smart, but you have no art-istic skills
So there's no way that you'll go far
In this battle, 'cause that'll be the end of you, and if you think you have a chance
I'll have to do massive damage to your ego
Please don't bother with your tired old creed
Oh gee, he can use a sword, somebody hold me!
Oh please, I've used swords since before you were born
Before you starred in porn games, so just admit that you're lame
To be as good as me takes ages
The stage is set for your defeat
You still have a chance to make your retreat
Or at least give up, 'cause there's no way you can catch up
To my skill
I will show you no mercy
Oh, what's wrong? You look quite ill
Well, my flow is sick, it must be contagious
Let me make this clear; you stand against one of the greatest
You're a thousand years too early to battle me, you can wait just
A little longer, can't you? Just be patient
Face it, you have no place with me in the arena
Hey sis, can you show this guy out? We need to clean up
And I'm looking at his eyes, I think he's starting to tear up
I guess this was a clear-cut victory for me- hey, cheer up!
These battles are all just in good, clean fun
Oh, lock the door on your way out, okay? See ya!

I had way too much fun with that.

edited 30th Aug '14 11:40:27 PM by PhysicalStamina

Do not spare the feelings of those who would not spare yours.
Blueblur21 Since: Jan, 2011 Relationship Status: Complex: I'm real, they are imaginary
#109: Aug 10th 2014 at 10:06:27 AM

Adam 'Edge' Copeland

Okay everybody just back the fuck up

Adam Copeland in the ring and I get to wrap up

Your pathetic little poems aren't affecting me

When I Spear you through a table you'll be respecting me

Anime better get out of the way

Or it'll be the latest victim on The Cutting Edge today

I've been training all my life this is all it has for me

From Ghana to Italy I'll be giving you a loss to me

Fall to the mat when you touch it you'll be finished

And everyone will know that you weren't only diminished

But you got your ass handed to you by a real OG

Edge cutting through a purple bitch like a boat through seas

Reeking of awesomness since 1997

Step into the ring, I'll send you to Heaven

Like the segment when I was in bed with Lita

I'll kick your ass and leave you bleeding with my last words

"See ya!"

edited 10th Aug '14 10:20:56 AM by Blueblur21

Arachnos (4 Score & 7 Years Ago) Relationship Status: Above such petty unnecessities
#110: Aug 10th 2014 at 10:53:09 AM

It's time to Hit The Floor... as you die!

INTRODUCING! Grand Couturier of REVOCS, Tailor of Terror, NUI HARIME!

To rap against me? Just abandon all hope!

You think you can beat me? Nope, nope, nope!

With a nice little stitch and a clean little cut

The Grand Couturier will sew your mouth shut!

Wow, you're a wrestler? Not even a fight

More like a massacre, am I right?

Before this is over, I'll make you squeal!

Haha! You guys don't even fight for real!

And from what I hear, it's safe to take

That your rapping skills are just as fake!

Call yourself Edge? You're certainly dull

I'll design some nice headwear, out of your skull!

Tada! Meet a real edge with bite!

You sure seem pale! Hey dude, you alright?

That tint doesn't fit you, let's instead

Slice open your belly to color you red!

And close that mouth, a fly might get in

You faker, you poser, you silly has-been!

You think I'm afraid of a sad little thug

With a worn down body pumped full of drugs?

Even your moves' names are all lame and weak

I could do better any day of the week!

Perhaps you are king in your little kid ring

That won't change a thing when you feel my sting!

edited 10th Aug '14 11:00:33 AM by Arachnos

FergardStratoavis A Fluff Ringer from Bellveins (Troper Knight) Relationship Status: A gay little love melody
A Fluff Ringer
#111: Aug 10th 2014 at 11:13:44 AM

Bow down before The Master of Disaster, Yuuki Terumi!

Well well well

Someone's full of themselves

Befitting of certain pathetic selves

That I have to deal with on daily basis

You're no different, string doll

My rhymes will kick you and roll

Into insanity

Befitting your lack of clarity

On who's the top dog and troll around

That is a sound

Of your bones breaking

Your injuries escalating

My name is Yuuki Terumi

And I'm the master of trollin'

This very rap designed

To send your tiny brain bowlin'

Regeneration? That's cute: I can cheat death instead

There is no killing me, go ahead, you'll be mad

At how your attempts fail one after another

As I weaken you and kill you, with little to no bother

I outsmart computers, think you can do the same?

That disco dancer's a boss of you, it's your only claim to fame

Have you seen Monty Python? I suggest you do

So that you'll be prepared for what I'll put you through

I don't need silly scissors to cut your arms off

I'll do my Ouroboros magic, let you with a cough

Of your very own blood as you squeal and cry for mercy

Sorry, none of that I'll give to you, that is not fancy

Go home and cry to clown that you call your mother

I'm a god of your life, so don't even bother

Blueblur21 Since: Jan, 2011 Relationship Status: Complex: I'm real, they are imaginary
#112: Aug 10th 2014 at 11:27:13 AM

Can we go again or only once?

FergardStratoavis A Fluff Ringer from Bellveins (Troper Knight) Relationship Status: A gay little love melody
A Fluff Ringer
#113: Aug 10th 2014 at 11:34:16 AM

You sure can go again though you might want to change an avatar for that, I guess.

Blueblur21 Since: Jan, 2011 Relationship Status: Complex: I'm real, they are imaginary
#114: Aug 10th 2014 at 11:36:11 AM

Okay. I love this thread and I hope my rap wasn't terrible.

MicoolTNT Shadow of Legends from 'straya, m8 Since: Apr, 2012 Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
Shadow of Legends
#115: Aug 11th 2014 at 12:44:52 AM

It was epic. Now, who should I use to take down Mr. Terumi... How about...

Asaga Oakrun, Hero of Justice and Pilot of the Black Jack!

Asaga here, and let me make it clear,

It's time to begin, and I'm gonna win!

Hero of Justice, fighting for the masses,

My missiles come flying, gonna leave you crying,

When I shove your Ourobos right up your ass!

Meet my baby, Black Jack, ain't she fine,

Gonna crush you to paste, then drink you like wine

And I tell you right now, it'll sure be delicious

To crush somebody so thoroughly malicious!

Justice coming at you, speed-of-light

This will be all over without a fight!

And when I'm done with you, you'll be PACT

Into a trash can just like a rat!

And if that's not enough, let me call in my friend!

Lasers, Saviours, the whole shebang!

I hope a swift thrashing is your desire,

For you've aroused the ire of the Sunrider!

edited 29th Aug '14 7:26:03 PM by MicoolTNT

"We can handle what is true, for we are already living it."
Tenzen12 Red Lagoon Since: Jul, 2011
Red Lagoon
#116: Aug 11th 2014 at 2:39:13 AM

Kongou: Arpeggio Of Blue Steel

I don't drink tea and I never cry
and Death Star was never my style.
I can be alone,to me friendship doesn't matter
But I do know having numbers Is indeed better.

I don't care who you are
Or what you can
I will I will go with my fleet
And nuke whole land.

Hydrogen bombs, lasers, missiles
I will smite these
my shields are all but useless
Pick fight with me was your first and last miss

When I do my job I don't use breaks
With my petabyte brain
who said brute force and precise tactic
can't go hand in hand?

So just die, I can go my way.

edited 11th Aug '14 3:06:02 AM by Tenzen12

MicoolTNT Shadow of Legends from 'straya, m8 Since: Apr, 2012 Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
Shadow of Legends
#117: Aug 30th 2014 at 10:10:42 PM

Can't let this thread die, but don't know anything about Arpeggio Of Blue Steel (yet).

"We can handle what is true, for we are already living it."
Grounder Main Character Since: Aug, 2013 Relationship Status: All is for my lord
Main Character
#118: Aug 31st 2014 at 8:45:33 AM

Asagi Asagiri

Hey birdbrain, you think you're really tough?

I got a spaceship that can destroy planets, your little tiny boats won't be anywhere near enough

To even get near me, you'd need a rocket and at least a modest crew

Oh wait, the only person left who can deal with your complex was designed to rat on you!

You can't even rhyme, lady, pack your bags and go home

Summer's Greetings, biyatch, you just got pwned!

FergardStratoavis A Fluff Ringer from Bellveins (Troper Knight) Relationship Status: A gay little love melody
A Fluff Ringer
#119: Sep 23rd 2014 at 2:42:45 PM

Make way for The Magnificent Paragon of Masculinity - The Mighty Kamina!

You've heard the man

I suggest you scram

For this rap will hit you with a loud, strong BLAM!

They know me everywhere

They recognize my shades

I might as well run for the Prez of United States!

With my little bro Simon we can take on the world

Do the magic, save ladies, let badassery unfold

For we break laws of physics

Understand that big fact

With my katana and my swag

I pave the tract

Kick the logic to the curb!

Might as well be my motto!

Drill a bad guy in half

Kick him into some grotto

So the weak won't be afraid

Of madmen's heavy tolls

Repeat after me!

This is how Dai-Gurren rolls!

dreamgor Popculture Reference! from sweden Since: Jan, 2015
Popculture Reference!
#120: Sep 23rd 2014 at 11:46:37 PM

been waiting for somebody to use that avatar or end with his phrase since the game started, thank you very much. Sorry if it is a bit long, tried to match the rap to the song. EDIT: Final edit, I promise. I forgot that magic word and to insert a few tropes.

KamenRiderDecade - Tsukasa Kadoya passes through!

When people ask me ”Who the hell are you?” I’ll reply as I always do: ”Just a passing-through Kamen Rider, remember that.”

Henshin!

*Music starts*

Just a Hero of Japan here, riding in with style.

That newest rider, Fifteen, I was an even match for him.

I started off with nine Riders, each a warrior who can hold his own.

By now I have more forms than you can count and power to live up to my name, ”Destroyer of Worlds”!

I must destroy old worlds, to create new worlds, that’s what I do best! I will…

RIDE THE WIND!

Just going to give you, a journey through the decade, (Kuuga, Agito, Ryuki)

With a Rider Kick to your face. (Faiz, Blade, Hibiki)

I end all worlds to create anew, (Kabuto, Den-O, Kiva) my successors will go neo-heisei on you.

And this is how I look when I’m COMPLEEETEE! (Final Kamen Ride, Decade!)

Music goes instrumental for a while

Giant monsters, I rock them apart with Hibiki by my side.

Just for you I’ll summon the ultimate rider.

You never stood a chance, just like Rook!

You’ll see Double before I’m through, my power has Infinite potential,

Almost as vast as the Space, you’ll need Magic to deal with me,

You will not defeat this Warlord before he Drives all over you.

The camera reflects, a parallel world, where you might defeat me,

But that’s not a destination on our journey, this is my victory!

instrumental again

This wind too, wants to grant you fortune, looks like this isn’t my world either.

Looks like I’ll continue my journey forever but that doesn’t matter to me! Once again I’ll…

RIDE THE WIND!

All the way to my goal, you don’t stand a chance anymore!

Not just a dream! I’ll write my own story, through these pictures.

Narutaki’s cursing me again,

And Diend just stole your treasure,

To finish you off in a flash I’ll borrow Kabuto’s HYPER CLOCK UP!

edited 25th Sep '14 12:51:04 PM by dreamgor

just your average nerd who loves games, manga, fanfiction, literature, and webcomics.
DevilPsyco from The Underworld (pretty deep down in the ground) Since: Jul, 2014 Relationship Status: In another castle
#121: Oct 30th 2014 at 3:39:57 PM

Imperfect Cell here to show you how a rap is done!

"Keh keh keh... let's see! You're a Kamen Rider, eh?

Well I gotta let ya know, you have a decent show.

But don't you think for one second that you can party,

For your show will never be as awesome as Dragon Ball Z!

You can ride your Kamen all day if you want,

But compared to me you're nothing but wet sand.

The name is Cell, came from a shell, a star in Abridged,

Compared to me, you will see, you're mismanaged!

You need a suit but get the boot, get outta here,

The superior between us two is pretty clear!

Cyborgs? So original, it makes me laugh,

You should be begging for my autograph!

It's over now, this song is done, after this thing:

Dragon Ball Z is and always will be the king!"

edited 30th Oct '14 3:41:49 PM by DevilPsyco

In the year 202X, all is devastation... Soon, any last shred of hope had by the saintliest optimist shall die and decay.
MrKirb Lights, Camera, Action! from bluh bluh land Since: Apr, 2011 Relationship Status: Healthy, deeply-felt respect for this here Shotgun
Lights, Camera, Action!
#122: Nov 10th 2014 at 3:07:43 PM

Courier Six - Delivering some drop dope rhymes

Huh? What's that, are you really rapping or just wanking like Long Dick Johnson?

Can't argue that your show's king

King of fillers, waiting, and overdrawn screaming

The Courier here, sending you a message

A message of how this rap is gonna go down


A bug man like you, a "perfect warrior", composed of freaks from space

Nice job getting owned by a little kid, what a disgrace

Feasting on humans through your bum, now that's dumb

Why don't you let the Crimson Fucker be the real baddie?

Why bother fighting when you should fly back to your robo-daddy?


Doesn't matter if I'm a dude or a chick

Made 3 nations my bitches, wouldn't to mind to add one more to the list

Weapons, fists, smarts, or just luck, I render all schemes against me rendered into piss

Two bits to the noggin doesn't stop me, all that does is make me angry

Big iron on my hip, silver tongue behind my lip

No challenge is too great for this mailman


Backed by my homies, doped by Obsidian

Badass protagonist representing New Vegas

I am an MC deliveryman, second to none

Let go of this battle, begin again

edited 10th Nov '14 3:42:39 PM by MrKirb

MicoolTNT Shadow of Legends from 'straya, m8 Since: Apr, 2012 Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
Shadow of Legends
#123: Jan 7th 2015 at 5:53:15 PM

Omega, the Final Number!

   By the Will of Metatron and the Will of Life,   

   I'll end the suck with which this battle's been rife!   

   With beauty so great, many would call me wife,   

   And Metatron firepower second to none!   

   Stand against me? I'll show you my gun,   

   So that the Will of Life can have its fun!   

   And when that dance is done,   

   I'll gather my power,   

   And bring down a shower,   

   Make it rain, bring the pain!   

   And if you think I'm weak in melee? You'd best stay away   

   Or I'll send you flying with the power of Gravity!   

   Shining Emissary, don't you forget it,   

   To cross me after this, you'd have to be a real halfwit!   

"We can handle what is true, for we are already living it."
Weirdguy149 Former King from Lumiose City Since: Jul, 2014 Relationship Status: I'd jump in front of a train for ya!
Former King
#124: Jan 7th 2015 at 6:07:20 PM

From Jurassic Park Heaven, slapping down some killer slap-downs, RAPTOR JESUS!

You tryin' to scare me?

I'm the Alpha Omega O.G.!

You make me so sick

That I wanna whack you with mah magic stick!

I'm the Trinity: Father, Hatchling, and Holy Dino-Spirit.

You punks need to know and fear it

And if you flip me off with zeal,

, well, looks like you'll be my next meal.

The legend has returned.
Exenteration It don't matter. None of this matters. from 616 Wharf Avenue Since: Dec, 2014 Relationship Status: Awaiting my mail-order bride
It don't matter. None of this matters.
#125: Jan 9th 2015 at 6:09:25 AM

Alright you fruity bastard, I think it's about time for someone to put you in your place.

I don't mean no can of mace, because you just ain't no ace.

You keep lurking around here staring at virtual ass because your daddy wasn't around to give you a good smack.

You lack the testicular fortitude (I probably can't even tell if you're a dude) to put up a good rhyme.

I don't mean to bust your hyme', but you really outta just get out and get rid of that over feminized vernacular because your rapping just ain't spectacular.

(That was bad.)

"'Tonight you will get you dick ripped off.'...Well that doesn't sound very right, does it?"

Total posts: 133
Top