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MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#101: Oct 6th 2014 at 7:46:44 AM

I don't see what Peter's problem could be.

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
maxwellelvis Mad Scientist Wannabe from undisclosed location Since: Oct, 2009 Relationship Status: In my bunk
Mad Scientist Wannabe
#102: Oct 6th 2014 at 8:10:08 AM

Look at the girl.

Of course, don't you know anything about ALCHEMY?!- Twin clones of Ivan the Great
MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#103: Oct 6th 2014 at 8:49:27 AM

... She looks a bit like Jessica Drew AKA Spider-Woman?

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
maxwellelvis Mad Scientist Wannabe from undisclosed location Since: Oct, 2009 Relationship Status: In my bunk
Mad Scientist Wannabe
#104: Oct 6th 2014 at 9:43:22 AM

Maybe it's less freaky to you because you're not as much a fan of Sentai/Power Rangers, but Miss America and all of Battle Fever are infamous for their bizarre costumes, an ill-thought attempt to emulate American super-hero costumes. Between the beady eyes, really detailed faces on the helmets, and the wig and flesh-colored legs on Miss America's costume, a lot of fans find them rather freaky-looking.

Of course, don't you know anything about ALCHEMY?!- Twin clones of Ivan the Great
MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#105: Oct 6th 2014 at 9:46:26 AM

Well, yeah, I did notice that they looked quite off-putting, but I don't get why Spider-Man out of all the assembled superhero(ine)s is specifically singled out as having such a bad reaction to them that he has to be excluded from the team that will be sent there.

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
maxwellelvis Mad Scientist Wannabe from undisclosed location Since: Oct, 2009 Relationship Status: In my bunk
Mad Scientist Wannabe
#106: Oct 6th 2014 at 9:50:12 AM

I just get the feeling he'd find them really freaky in general, and lacking Deadpool...

I don't know, I think that Ultimate Spider-Man cartoon is rubbing off on me.

edited 6th Oct '14 9:51:55 AM by maxwellelvis

Of course, don't you know anything about ALCHEMY?!- Twin clones of Ivan the Great
EvaUnit01 Fandom Heretic Since: Mar, 2011 Relationship Status: Complex: I'm real, they are imaginary
Fandom Heretic
#107: Oct 6th 2014 at 12:39:11 PM

Of all the Spidey cartoons I've seen, Ultimate is the worst.

<is totally unfazed by Battle Fever suits>

Chalk it up to 70's TV logic.

maxwellelvis Mad Scientist Wannabe from undisclosed location Since: Oct, 2009 Relationship Status: In my bunk
Mad Scientist Wannabe
#108: Oct 6th 2014 at 8:30:32 PM

Chalk it up to Toei trying to blend Jack Kirby and Shotaro Ishinomori's design styles and not quite succeeding at it, I say. You know, growing pains.

Of course, don't you know anything about ALCHEMY?!- Twin clones of Ivan the Great
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#109: Oct 12th 2014 at 9:40:42 PM

I was Just Wondering...

"I was just wondering," Joker mused aloud suddenly, "what's the point of having a two-faced coin if you'll mark one of the sides anyway, so it can work as the tails? Doesn't that beat the purpose of the coin being two-faced to begin with?"

Dent gave him a blank stare over the breakfast table. "After all this time, you're really asking that?"

Joker shrugged. "I dunno. Maybe you're hallucinating this after the orderlies screwed your medication up. In that case, I want you to know— I love you."

Dent made a strangling warning gesture with a hand.

"You hallucinated that, too," Joker primly wiped his mouth clean with a handkerchief. "So, why don't you get yourself a normal coin with heads and tails anyway? It'll produce the same effect when flipping it, and it has to be cheaper to come by than silver dollars. Who are you, the Lone Ranger with his mountain silver mine and his Injun sidekick?"

"The coin has to be two-faced... because I'm Two-Face, not Heads-and-Tails!" Dent growled.

It was Joker's turn to stare blankly, as Dent reassumed his angry eating.

Joker then sighed. "Shouldn't you call yourself Two-Heads, then, because that side is called 'heads', not 'faces'..."

"The face is in the head. So shut up."

"Right. Of course. Silly me," Joker rubbed circles on his own forehead. "Leaving the serious questions aside, would you terribly mind if I asked you a very silly question?"

Dent had enough and slammed the plate on his face.

KnownUnknown Since: Jan, 2001
#110: Oct 12th 2014 at 9:52:01 PM

[up] The humor reminds me of a really crazy fanfic I read a long time ago about Batman having to take the Arkham patients on a field trip to an aquarium. The whole thing was full of trolly conversations like that.

"The difference between reality and fiction is that fiction has to make sense." - Tom Clancy, paraphrasing Mark Twain.
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#111: Oct 24th 2014 at 6:52:03 PM

What's in a Name?

"You know," Captain America mused aloud then, as they walked out of the Bugle's building, "come to think about it, I don't think I've ever been told... what does the first 'J' stand for, anyway?"

"Oh, that. Jennifer," Spider-Man said.

Cap gave him a shocked stare. "You're joking."

"Hm, nope. There are some things even I won't joke about. I'm serious!" he said, one hand on his heart.

"But, why—"

"His mother really, really wanted a girl, or at least that's what Robbie once told Peter," he shrugged. "No wonder he's such a crank, huh? If only he wasn't so old fashioned and stubborn, he'd have changed it to something better fitting him, like... Janine!"

"I'm actually sort of shocked you don't use that to rile him up," Cap confessed.

"Hey, as I told you, I have my limits, too. Besides, I'd never mock an old girl."

Steve, who was old and had been called girl names quite often in his youth as well, could sympathize, so he only nodded and changed the venue of conversation.

MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#112: Oct 25th 2014 at 6:13:21 AM

... Come to think of it, why hasn't Marvel revealed what the first "J" stands for?

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
EvaUnit01 Fandom Heretic Since: Mar, 2011 Relationship Status: Complex: I'm real, they are imaginary
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#116: Oct 26th 2014 at 7:47:04 AM

I thought John was his son, the astronaut.

kingandcommoner Since: Aug, 2014
#117: Oct 26th 2014 at 2:03:26 PM

I'm not entirely sure when it was revealed. His son is John too. So was his father.

NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#118: Nov 9th 2014 at 2:17:31 PM

Top Ten Differences Between Batman and Superman.

10. When Superman acts as a callous, insulting, condescending, deranged dick to his friends and teammates, it's because of red kryptonite. When Batman does it, it's because of Frank Miller.

9. Superman's clinically obsessed little omnipotent imp who constantly harasses him at least has the good sense not to dress up in Superman's clothes.

8. With one of them, Wonder Woman doesn't have to fake her orgasms.

7. One of them has a jokes and pranks obsessed villain who isn't lame. The other one has the Prankster.

6. When Superman wants to turn back time, he flies around the world really really fast. When Batman wants to turn back time, he kidnaps Father Time and hangs him from a flagpole thirty stories high until he relents.

5. Superman thinks keeping the clothes from your dead sidekicks in your trophy room is kind of creepy.

4. Superman can watch The Mark of Zorro without breaking down.

3. Batman's young distaff counterpart doesn't have romances with horses.

2. Batman is watching you right now. Superman is hearing you right now.

1. Superman thinks Iron Man so could defeat Thor with enough preptime. Batman strongly disagrees.

edited 9th Nov '14 2:25:39 PM by NapoleonDeCheese

SonOfSharknado Love is Love is Love Since: Oct, 2013 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#120: Nov 10th 2014 at 2:13:13 AM

Batman is watching you right now. Superman is hearing you right now.
Superman is also watching you right now. In visible, infrared, ultraviolet, and X-ray spectrums. All at once.

Oh, and he's probably smelling you right now, too. Even though he's in space.

Superman thinks Iron Man so could defeat Thor with enough preptime. Batman strongly disagrees.
[lol]

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#122: Dec 7th 2014 at 8:09:54 AM

Credit Where Credit Is Due.

"Animal Man?" Batman repeated.

Superman nodded. "He says he needs talking with you. It's a private matter, apparently."

The Dark Knight sighed as he moved towards the meeting hall of the Watchtower. There, he found Animal Man standing with a large black bat perched on his shoulder. "What do you want? I'm short in time right now."

"Good evening to you too," Buddy Baker said. "Recognize this little fellow?" he asked, touching the bat's head with a finger.

"Should I?"

"Well, really, perhaps not. But you should remember his great-grandfather. He's told me his great-grandfather was the bat who flew through your window that fateful night when you were agonizing about your choice for a costume."

"... are you serious?" asked Batman.

"Oh, yes, I am," Animal Man nodded grimly. "And that poor bat died in poverty, without ever receiving the credit he deserved for his inspiration. So, I come here tonight as his family's representant. We are going to sue for a 60% of all Batman related memorabilia over the ten years of your superhero career."

"..." Batman said.

"I'm serious," Animal Man reiterated.

—-

Batgirl and Batwoman stared at him, in complete disbelief. "... you want WHAT?!" Batgirl exclaimed.

"Royalty payments over the unlicensed use of my inspiration for your images," the Batman said. "And don't say it can't be done. A black cavern bat just beat me in the courts, and if he can, I goddamn sure can too..."

"What about Bat-Mite?!" Batgirl asked. "Did you slap him with one of these orders, too?!"

"Well... the courts dictated he fell under the parody fair use clause..." he had to admit.

edited 7th Dec '14 8:11:03 AM by NapoleonDeCheese

MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#123: Dec 7th 2014 at 8:48:21 AM

I guess they amended the US court laws to include animals in the legal definition of "people". [lol]

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#124: Dec 7th 2014 at 9:31:20 AM

All thanks to G'Nort and Detective Chimp's efforts.

NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#125: Mar 2nd 2015 at 7:10:43 AM

Self Made.

"I'll take those pearls the lady's wearing," the man walking out of the shadows raspily told them, with a huge crooked smile and a gun aiming at them in his hand.

"What...?" Thomas Wayne growled. "Never! Why you dirty rat, you'll never lay a hand on my—"

"Outta the way, Pops!" the man told Thomas, squeezing the trigger. As the mortally wounded man fell to his feet, the thief pocketed his gun back. "Well, it's done, lady," he told the woman now walking over her husband's dying body, ignoring his last frantic attempts to reach for her. "Joe Chill delivers no matter what."

"What do you mean it's done?" she asked, pointing at little Bruce. "The payment was for both of them!"

"Actually, nah," Chil huffed, pulling the gun back up. "It was for both of you," he corrected, shooting her through the head. As she fell, he shook his head. "Listen, lady, I draw the line at kids." Then he looked at Bruce. "So the other half's in my account by tomorrow, right?"

Bruce nodded."Thank you, Mr.Chill. And don't worry. I'll always have a place for a man with your talents at my side."

—-

"— and that's how Joe came to work for me," Owlman explained, as the old butler walked away. He smiled at his counterpart's steadily building rage. "Then tell me, I'm curious. How did your parents die?"

Batman slammed a fist on Owlman's face.

edited 2nd Mar '15 7:11:31 AM by NapoleonDeCheese


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