An Archmage Reborn villain, since it's been on my mind a lot lately.
- Name: Rand Adenade
- Age: 26
- Appearance: Rand is a tall muscular young man with unruly brown hair framing a handsome but insolent-looking face and narrow black eyes. He wears a skintight, black high collared shirt and brown flowing silk pants tucked into black leather boots. He wears heavy armor on his arms and hands, with spikes along the forearms and elbows. Woven into the back of his shirt is the symbol of Legenada.
- Personality: To outsiders, Rand comes off as arrogant, brutal and viciously paranoid. He rarely experiences doubt about his actions or decisions and will rarely admit to mistakes, even if evidence of them is shoved in his face. Likewise, he is quite proud of his skills and abilities, both magical and physical, and has no problem inflicting pitiless beatings on those who cross him. Rand tends to think the worst of people, having seen the depths of society all his life. While he is able to be civil and even friendly to others, he holds most people at arm's length and waits for them to make a hostile move. However he is extremely loyal and protective towards those he respects and cares for. He expresses a great deal of loyalty and courtesy towards his master Bartholomew and follows his instructions almost without question. Rand is fiercely protective of his childhood friend and lover Rose, and adamant about destroying threats to her safety, even if he has to engage them himself. Despite this, he is fiercely jealous of Rose’s accomplishments and his multiple defeats at the hands of Veil River—a wizard of comparatively lesser power—have left him with a gnawing sense of inferiority that he struggles to shake off.
- Abilities: Rand is a combat wizard specializing in the Old World Magic of gravity manipulation. He can pull multiple enemies forward at high speeds or blast them away from him, using his body as the epicenter of the attack. He can also increase a target's personal gravity, making them either too heavy to move or so light that the merest touch will send them flying. In addition to this, Rand is a capable street brawler, lashing out with his fists and feet when he deems his magic unnecessary. He is an adept thief, skilled at everything from pick-pocketing to outright mugging. As the Red Cloak Sorrow’s partner, Rand has command over Legenada’s criminal enterprises operating within Anticlaire city and his control over them is second only to Sorrow herself.
- Weaknesses: Because it is Old World Magic, Rand's gravity control costs rigorous amounts of anima, and every spell cast weakens him greatly. His attraction and repulsion spell only affects objects on the level as he is, leaving him vulnerable to attacks from above. The increase or decrease of a target's personal gravity only works on one person at a time, so multiple enemies can overwhelm him. Rand has a deep-seated inferiority complex created by Rose's magic surpassing his, and it is made even worse by multiple defeats by Veil River. This drives him to increasing acts of recklessness that endanger his life.
- Goal: Aid his master and lover in a plan to summon the Source of All Magic and take control of it and prevent magic from being used to harm and destroy.
- Motivations: Much of Rand's desire to change the Haven for the better stems from his love and respect for both Rose and Bartholomew. Rose and Rand have known one another since they were kids and Bartholomew saved them both from a life of crime and poverty when they were teenagers. Even without those motivations, Rand has seen first-hand the horrors of the war between the Conclave and Iron Legion and the suffering of countless victims who are caught in the middle.
- Role in the Story: Rand is the first enemy that Veil River encounters, and he is indirectly responsible for the Gloria staff binding itself to the young man. After being defeated by Veil he becomes something of an Unknown Rival itching for a rematch. During the events of Veil and Mia's visit to Anticlaire City, he is the Dragon-in-Chief to the Red Cloak Sorrow/Rose due to her being too ill to fight directly. After Rose's death Rand takes on the role of Bartholomew's personal aid, and eventually assists him in the destruction of Evermerry. His final role is to guard the Anchor of Bartholomew's Sensor Curse, an act that costs him his life at Nadia's hands.
Backstory: Rand grew up in Anticlaire City’s slums, a large Wretched Hive known as the Nest by its citizens. His first eight years were spent under the dubious care of a bitter woman named Jesse. While not physically violent, Jesse was emotionally disengaged from him and made it clear from day one that she was not his mother and didn’t expect to be treated like it. She often told him just how much she resented the burden of caring for him, but strangely never attempted to abandon him. Surrounded by filth, disease and poverty, Jesse taught Rand to take what he wanted from the Nest's flooded streets. He often served as a cute lure for victims while Jesse would empty their pockets—and as he grew older, he participated in violent attacks that emptied their victims of their valuables.
When Rand was elven years old, his life changed forever. The two factions that split control of Anticlaire down the middle—the magic-using, Conclave-supporting Mystics and the Iron Legion-aligned Machinists—erupted into violent war. Zealous members of the Mystics unleashed upon the city a virulent Old World curse that caused horrific physical degeneration, killing thousands. The death toll and contagious nature of the curse sent the city into panic and soon order broke down. Rand lost sight of Jesse in the confusion and after days of looking, gave up.
On his own, Rand was able to loot to his heart’s content, but was still disturbed by the suffering around him. One day as he fled from a group of enraged men he’d stolen from, a sickly-looking girl his age appeared and helped him escape into her makeshift shelter. She introduced herself as Rose, telling him flat out that she was infected and had been on her own since her family had died in the terrorist attack. Unafraid of being contaminated, Rand suggested that they become a team to increase their chances of survival, and the two of them stuck together from then on.
While Anticlaire city slowly rose from the ashes, its criminal underworld thrived and Rand and Rose found themselves often doing odd jobs or even violence for various felons in exchange for money to pay for food and healing magic Rose needed to stave off the curse’s effects. One day, at the age of fifteen, Rand noticed an elderly but well-dressed man wandering into a particularly nasty part of Anticlaire. Despite Rose’s protests, Rand persuaded her to help him mug the man before someone else did. However they both found themselves easily beaten by his magic. When they fled in fear, he prevented them from escaping and offered an interesting proposition—become his apprentices, and help him put an end to the suffering and violence that scarred their world.
The pair agreed, and the man took them away from Anticlaire city and to the distant land of Enirtlah. Rand and Rose were amazed learn the mysterious old man was Bartholomew Harper, the Lord Protector of Enirtlah. They lived a peaceful life in his palace while learning Bartholomew's peculiar brand of magic, and eventually became part of his plan. When he felt they were ready in both mind and body and their resolve was immovable, he sent them back to Anticlare to establish Legenada's presence in the city.
Relevant Tropes:
- Abusive Parents: Rand's guardian Jesse plays with this trope. On one hand, she was incredibly abusive emotionally—she made sure he knew just how much she hated taking care of him, and often cursed him and called him a "worthless brat". However she never even attempted to abandon him, and she unfailingly taught him the skills that would keep him alive in the Wretched Hive of the Nest. Jesse's departure wasn't intentional, but a simple case of losing him as Anticlaire city fell apart. Even after that, she spent months searching for him until she assumed he was dead. The fact that she was his older sister had a lot to do with this, and that combined with her steadfast refusal to actually leave him to die, is why he later spared her life.
- Aloof Older Sister: Jesse was Rand's older sister and had fled with him into the Nest when the Adenade family lost its standing in the Machinist Echelon. It was a dying request from their parents and she grimly held on to that duty, though she never allowed herself to grow particularly close to him.
- The Artful Dodger: Rand was like this when he was a kid, at least from Rose's perspective. For her, a formerly well-to-do girl who had lost everything, he was like nothing she had ever seen—dirty but proud, streetwise and exuding an aura of confidence and seemingly unafraid of the harsh conditions around them.
- Anger Born of Worry: After Veil defeats him the second time in Anticlaire while he and Ara are rescuing Mia, Rand explodes into anger when Rose swoops down from the rooftops and blasts both of them away with her powers. While he rants at her that he "wasn't done yet", it's clear that he was more worried about the toll any magical battle would take on her, than he is about his pride.
- Antagonist Abilities: His power to repel an enemy or suck them in makes him incredibly dangerous, as even opponents trying to stay away from him will simply be drawn inward and then assaulted with a barrage of fists and feet.
- Anti-Villain: Rand's goal is to help his loved ones create lasting peace in the Haven. Nothing wrong with that, right? Except that Bartholomew's plan involves participating in a vast criminal syndicate, mass-murder, capturing and torturing people who have done nothing wrong except have part of an Eldritch Abomination sealed inside of them, and if the plan is successful, it will cause massive societal and political collapse worldwide before things eventually stabilize.
- Arc Villain: Subverted. All of the Red Cloaks and their partners last through a single "arc" of Archmage Reborn. The fact that Rand made several appearances, along with his dialogue with Rose implied from early on that more was going on behind the scenes of Legenada than first met the eye.
- Arch-Enemy: Explored in regards to his relationship with Veil, mixed with The Rival. Being defeated by Veil was a crushing blow to his Pride. Even understanding that Veil was a mediocre wizard with no knowledge of combat magic and that the only reason he won was because of the Gloria lending him power, the loss still stung. It also awoke feelings of inferiority that he'd been burying since Rose surpassed him at gravity magic, to the point he wasn't even aware of them. But now they were all he could think of, and he blamed Veil for this, becoming fixated on killing him in a rematch, as if that would somehow solve his internal struggle.
- Awesomeness by Analysis: He figured out that Nadia's barriers were susceptible to gravity control powers. He came by this knowledge through years of watching her and noticing that Bartholomew had once made her light enough to reach a high cliff while she was clad in her protective shield. This knowledge allowed him to become the third person chronologically to injure her. In fact, the only reason he wasn't able to outright kill her was due to her using an illusion-inducing magical object, and her soul being bound to the moon. Even with the latter fact, if she hadn't had Corcoran's Emerald to produce illusions, he would have destroyed the body she was using at that time.
- Badass: Rand combines a barrage of street-brawling techniques with gravity magic to thoroughly destroy an enemy. Many members of Legenada respect his tactics, especially those who work with him on a close or daily basis, since he has little problem showing those techniques off.
- Berserk Button: Harm or ill-intent towards those he cares for. The reason Rand despises Nadia—and to a lesser extent, Sebastian—is because of the imperious way they treat Bartholomew, especially Nadia, to the point that Rose's nickname for Nadia was "the master's master." Bartholomew's calm but firm orders to let it go only worsen his anger, especially when he realizes that since Nadia and Bartholomew have known one another for 59 years, this has been going on for decades. After Nadia berates Bartholomew for delaying his march on Evermerry to mourn a former comrade, who he had just killed with his own hands, Rand openly tells her to shut up.
- Childhood Friend Romance: Rand and Rose's relationship started as one of convenience between two twelve year olds—one a street-wise and violent thief and the other an intelligent and resourceful upper-class girl who was out of her element and chronically ill. They helped cover one another's "blind spots" and slowly they became fast friends, which evolved into something more as puberty, hormones, and constant close proximity set in.
- Cruel Mercy: Jesse considers Rand sparing her life to be this. When the two of them encountered one another again, Jesse had married into the Zenhold crime family as the wife of one of their top enforcers and had two sons, a loving husband and a comfortable lifestyle. The war between crime factions destroyed her family and even took the lives of both her sons who were killed in the crossfire. When Rose basically threw her to Rand after she was captured, she bitterly asked him to kill her, because he "owed" her at least that. However Rand didn't kill her and instead just asked her why she had taken care of him all that time.
- Cynicism Catalyst: Inverted when it comes to Rose's death at Veil's hands. Though he respected Bartholomew, he was weary of the old man's lofty ideals of world peace, due to having a much simpler and more cynical outlook on the world. He and Rose had started to argue about whether to continue following Bartholomew, with Rand pushing for them to leave Legenada and once again live a quiet life for themselves in the time Rose had left before the curse killed her. After seeing her die fighting for what she believed in, he committed himself fully to following Bartholomew's orders in her memory, but over time became genuinely convinced that Bartholomew was the only person capable of "saving" the world.
- The Dragon: First to Rose and then to Bartholomew. Rand stayed as Rose's Red Cloak partner for years and after her death, he retreated back to Enirtlah to follow Bartholomew's orders directly. This eventually led to him assisting his master in attacking the city-state of Evermerry and utterly leveling it.
- Dragon-in-Chief: He is this to Rose/Sorrow in many ways, though it is only known to a few of Sorrow's select subordinates, especially in recent years. Even with the healing infusion, Rose's curse grows worse and her body's decline is moving faster than the magic can repair. Thus she is increasingly too ill or preoccupied to attend to her duties, something Rand has taken over at the time of Archmage Reborn. During the Vessel hunt in Anticlaire when Veil and Mia arrive in the city, he takes full control of Legenada's forces to find Mia with Rose only stepping in after the hard work has been done.
- Even Evil Has Standards: He expresses concern and even a small amount of pleading when Bartholomew decides to completely wipe Evermerry and its citizens off the map, just because the city's leader pushed his Berserk Button by accident It doesn't alter Bartholomew's behavior in any way, unfortunately.
- Gravity Master: Bartholomew taught Rand and Rose his gravity magic. While Rose excelled at mastering it, almost on the level of Bartholomew himself, Rand struggled to control it and worked extremely hard to achieve the power he currently holds. That said, he is a daunting opponent to face while using it.
- Happily Adopted: Rand was taken in by Bartholomew at age fifteen along with Rose, and while wary at first was completely disarmed and unprepared for the kindness and compassionate treatment he received. It slowly broke down his barriers and he began to regard Legenada's leader as someone who meant them no harm and who truly had their best interest at heart.
- Heroic Sacrifice: Rand tries to kill Nadia during their battle by casting Newton's Sphere, a spell that would allow him to destroy her body completely. Though he knows that he is in no condition to cast it, especially with the anima drain of the Anchor, he reasons that killing her will stop the hunt for the Vessels and the Source, so even if the curse is broken by his death, it won't matter. Unfortunately Nadia used Corcoran's Emerald to fool him into casting the spell several feet away from where she was standing.
- Fridge Horror turns his entire battle with Nadia into a Senseless Sacrifice: Even had Rand won against her, she would have been back within days or hours due to having a Body Backup Drive numbering in the thousands. He should have simply fled, but Bartholomew had never let him or Rose know anything about Nadia other than her true identity.
- Impoverished Patrician: The Adenade family had a high rank within the Machinist faction of Anticlaire, with a long history of invention and technical expertise. However Rand's father was interested in magic and with tensions running high, his decision to navigate possible peace talks in the Senate with the Mystics led to a nighttime raid on the Adenade family house, killing him and his wife and forcing their children into hiding.
- In the Back: Nadia stabs him from behind with a combat knife after he believes his gravity magic destroyed her.
- Living MacGuffin: Bartholomew makes Rand the Anchor for the Sensor Curse—a powerful Old World Magic spell that permanently blocks Sebastian's ability to sense where Veil and Mia are. Because the curse is rooted in Rand's body, it can only be nullified by killing him, thus making him Nadia's prime target. He even mentions the irony of this to the pair afterward, since he had been working so hard to capture Mia for similar reasons.
- Luke, I Am Your Father: More like Rand I am your sister where Jesse is concerned. Downplayed in story, as the revelation happened well before the events of Archmage Reborn and while Rand was startled, it didn't exactly shake his world.
- Mental Fusion: When Bartholomew casts his Soul Synchronicity spell, his mind and anima merge with Rand's and the two of them share Rand's body, infusing it with greater power as well as the ability to mentally communicate and share sight, sound and sensation. This powerful combination of the both of them is nearly invincible.
- Mob War: Bartholomew sent Rose and Rand back to Anticlaire with a large contingent of Legenada representatives. This enraged the organized crime factions that had taken root in Anticlaire—some for generations—and they took violent action to repel the invaders. The result was a bloodbath that lasted three years before the two of them led the Legenada forces to victory. Rand mentions, without hyperbole, that he lost track of how many people he killed on a daily basis during that time. With Anticlaire still recovering from the disaster, the police forces were in little shape to stop the fighting. One of the things that endeared Legenada to the citizenry—further cementing their place—is Rose's order that no civilians be harmed during the battles.
- Please, Don't Leave Me: Rand says this almost word for word to Bartholomew when the old man begins to cast the Sensor Curse, knowing that in his condition the undertaking will kill him. While Rand cried over Rose's body and her death truly damaged him, realizing that the last person he really felt anything for was going to leave him caused him to lose his composure completely.
- The Resenter: A part of him resents Rose for being vastly more powerful than he is in terms of her magical ability. The reason isn't exactly jealousy but instead a sense of wrongness—when they were street urchins, he was the brawn of the partnership and the streetwise protector while Rose handled the intellectual role such as negotiation and planning. The idea that she has obtained a vast power of her own that dwarfs his is...unsettling for him. But because she is who she is, he forces it down and tries to act happy for her.
- Shut Up, Hannibal!: During his battle with Nadia when she quietly but brutally attempts to cut down everything Bartholomew stood for. She then drops this bombshell.
- Nadia: "A father figure? A visionary? No, wrong on both counts, child. I crafted that plan and fed it to a broken little boy, very much like you, fifty nine years ago. I reforged Legenada into its current form with your 'so-called master' as my instrument. Just as I told him to procure two apprentices. So, if you consider him your 'father', then you may as well call me mother. So please, tell your mother what gives you the right to stand in the way?"
- Rand: "Huh. Maybe all that stuff you said is true, and maybe it isn't—I guess I just like Dad more." (Proceeds to attack her).
- Undying Loyalty: Rand is distrustful and arrogant, but if you earn his respect or affection, he will follow you anywhere. In some ways it is a part of his Pride—he believes that since he made the decision to follow you, it's absolutely the right one. This loyalty to Rose and Bartholomew is what caused him to participate in their plans and eventually undergo a Heel–Face Turn. Even more astounding is that he allowed Bartholomew to implant the focus of a curse on his skin, which parasitically drained his anima to keep itself going, without hesitation.
edited 25th Jul '15 11:12:22 PM by Swordofknowledge
Fear is a tyrant and a despot, more terrible than the rack, more potent than the snake. — Edgar Walllace
First off, dude, it is insane how much world building you've done, second, this Rand guy seems pretty interesting. At first I felt kinda bad for the bastard, but, killing and torturing innocent people for the sake of birthing, essentially, the anti-Christ is way too far, bastard.
- Name: The Seven Sins
- Age: Varies, although all most over 100 years old
- Appearance: Varies, though all have white hair and white eyes with small black rings where irises would be and white pupils. In terms of appearances:
- Pride is a woman who appears to be in her 30s, she has short hair rolled into a bun with the except of a bang over her right eye, she is often seen addressed in business attire.
- Greed is a tall, dark skinned man in his late 20s - early 30s, he often wears his regular black form-fitting Sin uniform, as well as jewelry, chains, gems, and other adornments.
- Wrath is a man of average height in his mid 40s, usually wears trench coats, has short cropped hair.
- Gluttony is an overweight Orc, with a semi-long buzzcut. Like Greed he usually wears his uniform, except without adornments.
- Envy is a young, short half-elf in his late teens - early 20s, he sports wild hair, wild crazy eyes and a near perpetual Slasher Smile on his face.
- Lust is a tall woman in her mid-20s, she has long flowing hair, a voluptuous figure, and wears a low cut top that stops at belly button length, as well as a skirt.
- Sloth is a man, that, like Envy, appears to be in his late teens - early 20s. He is very tall, has dark ringed eyes, a dazed look, and often wears robes.
- Personality: The Sins all have different personalities corresponding with their respective sin, though most of them are very loyal to each other.
- Pride is the aloof adoptive older sister to the others, she has complete control over the Sins' affairs in the mortal realm and is the creator and owner of the research company, Genesis. True to her name she is quite arrogant and vain, always wearing her business suit and viewing herself as being above her siblings.
- Greed is the second oldest of the bunch. Greed has a wild and care free attitude, he's always looking for valuable items in both the spirit and mortal realms and generally cares for a good time. Greed is the most laid-back of the Sins and eventually defects after watching Lust leave the group.
- Envy is next, about the same as Gluttony, the two share camaraderie as the only two non-human members of the group and from coming from the same time period. Envy is an Axe-Crazy maniac, he deeply loathes mortals, especially humans and elves, for reasons he no longer even remembers. Envy is fiercely loyal to his adoptive family and would gleefully slaughter anyone for them. Envy's personality is more or less similar to an insane temperamental teenager's.
- Gluttony is the same age as Envy and hails from the same time period. Gluttony is the Blue Oni to Envy's red. However, considering what Envy's like, this isn't much. Gluttony is another maniac willing to devour his enemies, often feeling extreme rage to those that harm Envy.
- Wrath comes next. Like Pride, Wrath is rather aloof to the rest of the "family". However, Wrath is indeed protective of them, such as when he opposes Selick's decision to execute Lust for the latter's defection. Despite his name, Wrath is usually rather calm and reserved, representing Tranquil Fury rather than insane, brutal rage, giving him a feeling of Dissonant Serenity.
- Lust arrived after Wrath. Lust is rather stoic and seemingly uncaring if not sadistic, although she later reveals herself to be somewhat quirky and talkative. Despite caring for he family, Lust still retains a sense of morality and feels enough guilt over her actions that she defects.
- Sloth is the youngest of the group, and, like the typical teenager lazes about. It's rare that he would participate in battle rather than leave the base where he could sleep or eat all day. Because of this he looks disheveled.
- Abilities: The Sins are all composed of three different soul gems, allowing them three common abilities. The soul gem that makes their core that keeps them stuck in a state of limbo makes them undetectable via anything but sight to spirit beings and gives them the ability to heal rapidly as long as the gem is filled with souls other than just their own. Another soul gem acts as an inhibitor that, when destroyed, triggers a monstorous transformation. The third and final gem seems to grant no particularly ability it acts as a kill switch in case any of the Sins go rouge.
- Weaknesses: If they are grievously injured enough their soul gems will be completely used up and they can die like any other mortal being. If one learns the true name of the Sin they regain their memories and are forced to pass on.
- Goals: They're only true goal is to serve Selick in his goal to obtain the power of God and create paradise. In reality, they don't even truly wish to serve him they are forced via threat of death and loyalty to the other members.
- Motivations: Selick saved each of them whilst they were on the brink of death, plus he will kill them if they turn on him.
- Role in the Story: They originally act as the "Men Behind the Man" and then fulfill the role of the Hidden Agenda Villains. After a while it seems as if Pride is The Big Bad of the series, only for it to be revealed that she is merely The Dragon for someone far worse. At this point they fulfill the role of the Quirky Mini Boss Squad.
- Backstory: Little is known of the Sins backgrounds, but what is known is that they were all once mortal, and, while in the middle of life and death, they were approached by Selick who made them a handsome offer. Now they serve Selick in his plots for an eternity unless they defect, at which point he'll kill them.
- Relevant Tropes
- Abusive Parents: Envy has this in his backstory, and Selick acts like one to all of them.
- Alas, Poor Villain: All have this for both their backstories, as well as their deaths.
- Antagonist Abilities:
- Pride has Intangibility and is Multi-Armed and Dangerous (Greed as well) in her One-Winged Angel form.
- Gluttony has Super-Senses
- Lust is a Poisonous Person
- Greed has Energy Absorption
- And all can nearly regenerate From a Single Cell (or soul gem)
- Arrogant Kung-Fu Guy: Pride is a subversion in that she's extremely arrogant but doesn't let it hinder her. Envy is this played straight.
- Barred from the Afterlife: Their status, they are not living but not dead either. While this gives them the ability to easily traverse both the mortal and spirit realms, they cannot truly move on.
- The Brute: Gluttony is this and Sloth becomes this when in his awakened state
- Chaotic Evil: When acting together this is what the group essentially is
- The Chessmaster: Pride is this with her handling of human affairs
- The Corrupter: This was Lust's role on the team, she tried this with The Hero but instead would perform a Heel–Face Turn.
- Dangerously Genre-Savvy: Wrath fits this in combat, and Pride fits this in terms of guessing the heroes' moves.
- Disproportionate Retribution: Envy, and more subtly, Wrath's definition of "even".
- Enemy to All Living Things: All apply but Envy especially
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: They all genuinely care for each other, with the exception of Pride
- Evil Albino: Most of them have pale skin with white hair
- Evil Is Sexy: Lust, obviously
- Eyeless Face: Sloth's awakened form
- Face of an Angel, Mind of a Demon: Lust, Pride, and Greed
- The Family That Slays Together: They consider themselves family
- Fantastic Racism: Envy utterly despises both humans and elves, and he doesn't even remember why. When he was mortal he and his elvish mother were abused by his human father, his father eventually killed his mother, and torment from both humans and elves pushed him to suicide.
- Fat Bastard: Gluttony
- Femme Fatale: Pride and Lust
- Femme Fatale Spy: Prode and Lust again, Pride by infiltrating the mortal realm and List by trying to manipulate the hero
- Hero Killer: An incredibly dangerous group of them.
- HumanoidAbominations: All of them
- Knight of Cerebus: Their appearance marks the moment where The Mage and Fallen get significantly darker
- Magnificent Bastard: Pride, basically, she has been manipulating the mortals and pushing them onto the path of brutal war for the past two decades, running her own military research company to further fan the flames. Even when the heroes have her cornered she doesn't take pick up pathetic Villain Ball, only losing because of a factor she couldn't have known of.
- Noble Demon: Warth fits this, choosing not to harm unless out of necessity. Greed tries to, but only out of viewing himself as better than his siblings.
- One-Winged Angel: All seven can unlock such a form by destroying a special soul gem that acts as an inhibitor.
- Outside-Context Villain: Despite running things behind the scenes, with the main conflict being between the Angels and Demons, no one saw them coming.
- Quirky Mini Boss Squad: They act like this, constantly joking around with each other and having unique flaws.
- OverarchingVillains: They're in the story for the whole ride, running things from behind the scenes and being behind most of the things that happen in both The Mage and Fallen, if not directly than by loose association.
- Really 700 Years Old: Their ages are as follows:
- Pride - 225 years old
- Greed - 212 years old
- Envy and Gluttony - 187 years old
- Wrath - 146 years old
- Lust - 103 years old
- Sloth - 97 years old
- And the oldest appears to be in his mid 40s
- Reptiles Are Abhorrent: Envy's awakened form is a six-legged mutant monitor lizard.
- Seven Deadly Sins: Well...obviously
- Tragic Villain: All of them were more or less forced into this, and were given names cruelly ironic to their original deaths.
- True Companions: Played straight and averted, all seven genuinely care for each other, but, they're so psychotic and so terrified of Selick that disobedience is met very harshly.
- Villains Want Mercy: Mostly averted, Envy scoffs at the idea, Wrath never begs, Sloth doesn't care, Greed is too proud, Pride didn't see it coming, and Lust chooses to die. Only Gluttony begged.
- Walking Spoiler: All seven of them originally, especially Pride
- White Hair, Black Heart: They all have deathly white hair
edited 27th Jul '15 7:26:43 PM by OmniGoat
This shall be my true, Start of DarknessThis attemp to villain come from a "proyect".
Name: Yoshino Takeda.
Age: 17
Personality: Petulant, Sadistic, Greedy, Anger issues
Abilities: Low-level Time-control (Originally), Super-Strength (After the "wacky friday"), Low-level reality alteration in the last arc.
Weaknesses: Her anger issues often distracting she of her goals, her obsession with her Arch-enemy can be problematic.
Goals: In priority:
1)Become more rich and skilled
2)Ruin the life or her Arch-enemy
Role In The Story: Arch-enemy of The Deuteragonist, the original Knight of Cerebus (the story change from a Slice of Life about a teenagers with super powers and start to become a dramatic story about the corruption in the City of Adventure).
Backstory: Originally a nasty Alpha Bitch who constantly bullied another girls in her school. She gets worse after she gain her powers in the "day of reborn" (A important event who for the sake of avoid the spoilers can be resume in: The day who The Magic Came Back). Originally her power gonna kill her but she is saved by a misterious man who give her "The ruby of power" a McGuffin who save her life. After this Yoshino watch how the The Ruby is melted in her body and become "part" of her. Now she can see and breath in the stopped time. She is one of "The Five Girls" (a group of girl selected by Wrong Genre Savvy Otaku who tried to use their to become her Battle Harem...he fail. Really fail.) and she eventually use her powers to come her Bully tendencies Up To Eleven ( Killed a girl who ruined her dress and use her powers to Make It Look Like an Accident]]). She is invited to live in the City of Adventure in where she become in a effective mercenary who killed lots of persons by money. She eventually meets with The Deuteragonist and when she recognize her like one of the Girls who she bullied in the High School the things get...bad.
EDIT: To:
-Omni Goat : Nice example of a Humanoid Abomination. Like many people i'm in the group who think in FMA when read the post. Nice villain
-To Ambar Sonof Deshar: Thanks for say me the rule. Thanks
.
Also: I forgot the part about the tropes, sorry.
Tropes: Alpha Bitch, The Bully, Ambition Is Evil, Body Surf, Knight of Cerebus, Evil Redhead.
edited 5th Oct '15 4:41:33 PM by KazuyaProta
Watch me destroying my country![]()
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Full Metal Alchemist's homunculi are the first to come to mind when I read the name. Not an FMA fan myself, though., so I don't think that means much anything.
I like that they're normal folks forced into it. I like it even more that you don't make their personalities necessarily representative of their names, as I'd normally see done to this type of characters. Same goes with their capabilities, too. When I began reading I thought that they would surely have abilities correspondent to their names. Pleasantly surprised there. Seemingly sympathetic backstory (from what I can gather anyway) is also something I always like in villains, so, yeah, I like them. I'm waiting to see how bad the Selick guy is.
This one's from The Eritian Story. Dame Aisel Kilimovich's personal assistant/servant.
Name: Merle
Age: 61
Appearance: Tall, lean, menacing in all ways perceivable. The ravage of time is very evident on him, and more so the literal scars from his past. Marks and cuts are everywhere on his face. There may be more on other parts of him, too, but the old man is usually clothed head to toes. Still, despite visible damage and apparent age, Merle also looks very physically capable. A Lso, he doesn't have a tongue.
Personality: Not much to speak of, in large part due to him being completely mute. In normal times he's little more than Aisel's near-automaton assistant, being completely passive and acts only when ordered. His true 'personality' shows when he's in combat. Up against an opponent that can put up a fight, he will periodically grunt, chuckle, or even laugh maniacally when inflicting or receiving blows.
Abilities: Merle's favorite tool is a dagger gifted by his father to him, and he can kill an entire room of train soldiers with it if conditions favor him. Merle's also good at setting up conditions that favor him, as his movement is dead quiet. Then again, he performs well with any melee weapon. He has very little regard for personal safety, too, acting in many ways more like a rabid dog in combat.
Weaknesses: He's old. Despite how strong he still is, or how fast he still is, old age weakens him considerably. His complete dependence on his master's orders to do most anything also means he's more of an automaton than a human bodyguard/servant.
Goals: Nothing.
Motivation: Serving the Dame is all the motivation that's left to him.
Role: Aisel's (the story's villainous co-protagonist) passive, obedient Dragon
Backstory: Merle, a Lions' Regimen war veteran, is the father of one House Kilimovich's servant. This particular servant, Anton, one day decided to steal Lady Ailrea Kilimovich's jewelry, that he might sell them to pay for his family debt. Anton was caught, naturally, and the lady Ailrea would have the man hanged if not for Merle's intervention. The deal, that the lady let Anton go in exchange for Merle's eternal servitude, and his tongue, was sealed, and Merle has since served House Kilimovich as little more than a slave. All went well after that, save for how the years of psychological torment and threats of his son being hunted broke the man down completely, leaving him a passive automaton that only reacts to orders. That is, until the lady passed away, and her daughter, Aisel Kilimovich, became a Mediator. Aisel has always had a fascination for the man, that he could be broken so thoroughly, and so employs him instead as a personal assistant and 'muscle'. Merle's experience as a soldier serves him well in the business of removing whoever Aisel wants removed.
Tropes
The Atoner: Was. That he still remains loyal to house Kilimovich is partly this. Merle viewed serving Aisel as the punishment deserves for all the atrocious things he did during his Regimen time. It's twisted, it's not really logical, but that's Merle. At the point when the story begins, he clearly already went mad and probably doesn't care anymore.
Ax-Crazy: As evident in how much joy he takes hurting others. There are times when Aisel has to order him to stop stabbing the corpse, after doing so for a few dozen times. This tendency is easily the only thing that can be said as his personality at the present.
Badass Grandpa: Merle's extremely dangerous. Old age may have dampened his lethality quite a bit, but even as is he's a threat to even the most elite of the Kingdom's soldiers. Even Aisel's lover Lamil, a top duelist herself, is unnerved by him.
The Brute: Is Aisel's muscle. Where the need for killing arises, the Dame calls on him to act.
Combat Pragmatist: It's his second nature, to say the least. He can use nearly anything in reach to kill a man.
Dark and Troubled Past: He partook in several war crimes and other crimes against humanity. He's come to regret it ever since.
Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Merle's not much of a good man to begin with. His days in the Vanguard Company of the Lions' Regimen saw him committing various atrocities from rape, mass killing of non-combatants, to cannibalism. Even if it's mostly peer pressure and he's been living in guilt ever since, there's still no redeeming him. That said, Merle loves his son Anton deeply, and will do anything to keep him safe.
Knife Nut: Mostly uses daggers as they are the easiest to carry around concealed. He's really good at it, too, but doesn't use them exclusively.
Off with His Head!: A favorite of his. Merle doesn't bother with the fancy cutting-his-head-clean-in-one-slice either. Instead he favors hacking through his victim's throat slowly with a dagger until the head comes off. In some instances, he just settles with cutting through the throat halfway, crossing it with Slashed Throat
Tongue Trauma: Apparently missing a tongue. Cut off by the late Lady Ailrea as part of the deal to spare his son's life.
edited 30th Jul '15 10:12:37 AM by arreimil
On the foundation of glass a dream is built. And, like glass, it shatters.
Good all around, and adds a good backstory layer to the typical "bad guy's puzzlingly loyal henchman" trope. I'd also like to explore whether he had some extra "assistance" in becoming a human robot (like black magic or a lobotomy, depending on the setting); you say it was simply a psychological breakdown, but that would make for a good reveal later on. Also, explore the possibility of him gaining his autonomy back.
One criticism I will add: the name "Merle" is not particularly intimidating.
ok boomer@Sword of Knowledge
I hope to make the audience feel just a little bit bad for Androgon, so I'm pleased by your reaction. While he's a bad, bad man, he genuinely does not understand where he went wrong and why the Goddess turned on him the way she did (she would contend, for the record, that much of what he did in her name was a cover for his own sadism and prejudices). I do intend, before he dies, for him to be struck by a spell that forces him to see his actions through the eyes of others, which drives home to him why he was damned. When he's finally destroyed for good, his last thought is to wonder if maybe the goddess might forgive him after all.
As to whether his mechanical parts can make him vulnerable, Shivah generally can't control anyone smart enough to shrug off her commands, and Androgon is more than smart enough—not to mention just plain powerful enough—to do that. That said, I do intend for her to manage to gain control of a piece of his tech at a very crucial moment when he is otherwise distracted.
@Omni Goat
Curious—in a group of 7, why are only two of them female? I'm not necessarily saying that needs to change, simply that I'm curious. I'll also note that Lust being both one of the females and undergoing a High-Heel–Face Turn is somewhat disheartening.
On the other hand, I always enjoy the 7 Deadly Sin motif and am interested in seeing where it can go. I started posting write-ups for a group like that myself once, though I only got the ones for Avar (Greed) and Kaisereen (Pride) up. Once I get some feedback on 777 and Zara from the story I'm currently writing, maybe I'll post some more of those.
@arreimil
So, I have to ask—when does Merle finally lose it and betray his mistress? You've got the set-up right there, and all it would really take, I imagine, is the death of his son—or for that matter finding his son on the opposite side. If that's not the direction you are intending to take this character, I'm curious—how do you envision Merle's story ending?
So, two more villains from the same story that brought you Androgon the Twice-Damned. I'm currently working on this novel (though I confess I'm struggling a bit with writer's block) and I intend for these two to be the main antagonists of more than one book. I'm posting them together because past a certain point their stories become highly intertwined.
Names: His Imperial Majesty Former Hunter-Killer Unit 777 (aka the Robot-Emperor), and Zara.
Ages: 17 or so, and mid to late twenties respectively.
Appearance: 777's a massive silvery, humanoid robot, standing ten feet in height and weighing close to a tonne. All weapons, propulsion systems, and other such paraphernalia are internalized so that they don't interfere with the streamlined nature of his appearance. He wears the death mask of one of the Lost World's greatest monarchs over his own face, and has a crown riveted to his skull. His eyes glow a pale blue, and when he discharges his weapons or fires his thrusters they're the same colour.
Zara is, initially, a moderately pretty dark-haired woman in her twenties, but as the series goes along and she incorporates more and more technology into her body, she becomes increasingly mechanical in nature. After losing her originally body but taking control over both King Rajan's cloning facilities and one of 777's back up bodies she becomes a horrible fusion of cloned Praetorian Guard (blonde hair, pale skin, blue and gold uniform) and hulking war machine, with the split about fifty-fifty (though not symmetrical in the least).
Personality: 777 conducts himself as he believes an emperor should. He does his utmost to be remote, aloof, and dignified, though should anyone question his imperial prerogatives he will swiftly lose his temper—albeit without ever changing the monotone nature of his voice. He views himself as the natural ruler of the Lost World, and expects anyone and everyone he meets to submit to him and bow. That said, he's aware that he's not the most powerful being in the wastes (though he'd easily be in the top five) , and will accept truly powerful entities like Androgon or Zara as equals—though never as superiors.
Zara is a mass of deep, black rage and its not getting any better any time soon. Angry and frustrated when her father was alive, his death (see below) sends her into a fury-induced mental breakdown that is seemingly irreversible. She's obsessed with gaining vengeance on Sargon Soll for killing her father and, increasingly, for making her into the cybernetic mess that she is now. As time passes, the anger subsides somewhat, though it never fully retreats, and she's able to make somewhat rational decisions—though always in pursuit of her grudge.
Powers and Abilities: 777 is the deadliest war machine to ever set foot in the badlands, which given the amount of Rogue Technology on the loose is a fairly impressive statement. The output of his weapons at full power could probably cut the top off a mountain, and all that energy is under the command of one of the best minds in the setting. Even more importantly, given the nature of the opposition he faces, he has enough safety protocols, firewalls, redundant systems, and back-up copies of his mind to resist any technopathic order, no matter who it comes from, making him effectively immune to both Shivah and Zara's powerset. Throw in a small, but dedicated gang of robotic followers (in this setting 1000 untrained men constitutes a capable army; 777 has 100 or so Hunter-Killer and Combat Droids at his command) and you have the warlord who has dominated the Glass Wastes for more than a decade. Following his alliance with Androgon, 777 upgrades his act further by beginning to commit books of magic to memory.
Zara is the strongest technopath in the setting, able to not only control and possess any technology she encounters but to, after successfully imposing her will on it once, reproduce that technology out of thin air and incorporate it into her body. Following her attack on King Rajan's convoy, and her subsequent seizure of control over one of 777's deactivated bodies, Zara is able to construct new forms that incorporate both his weapons tech, and the cloned limbs and innate skills of Rajan's genetically engineered Praetorian Guard. The end result is a lethal combination of superhuman athletic ability and combat skill, reinforced with an arsenal of sci-fi weaponry second only to 777's own.
Weaknesses: For all his imperial pretensions, 777 has never actually had to rule over human beings. His army is made up of robots, who while independent, display far less variation in personality than people. Most people, however poor or desperate, will not accept a machine as their master, and would rather flee to one of the other warlords than submit to him, leaving 777 with only a small followers, followers he lacks the resources to mass-produce. Prior to his alliance with Androgon, this means that 777's operations are confined to the Glass Wastes, and he lacks the ability to expand out into populated territory.
Zara's hyperfocus on killing Sargon blinds her to almost all else, and being in a body that isn't her own is slowly but steadily driving her around the bend. Her preference for brute force, coupled with her madness means that she'll never be a planner, and she's so overconfident that she rarely, if ever, comes up with a strategy before barreling into a fight—though with her powers being what they are, she often doesn't need to.
Goals: 777 wants to be emperor of all the Lost World, and grind every man, mystic, and machine in the Glass Wastes and badlands alike under his heel. To that end, he either needs to recruit powerful allies, unlock the alien ship that first brought the Rogue Technology to the planet (see Androgon's entry for more on that), or preferably, both.
Zara wants to avenge her father, Zandrel, by putting Sargon Soll in the ground. As her partnership with 777 deepens she also starts sharing his goal of taking over the Lost World, and unlocking the ship—the latter of which becomes an obsession for her near as strong as killing Sargon.
Motivations: 777 has been sure, ever since he killed Shivah's mother, that he is destined for greatness. Becoming emperor and returning civilization to the Lost World is, accordingly, the greatest thing that he can think of, at least before association with Androgon and Zara opens his mind to the possibility of godhood.
Zara desperately wanted her father to see her as useful. That dream died when Sargon reduced Zandrel to so much radioactive dust, and Zara wants—needs perhaps—to kill him in order to get closure.
Role in story: 777 and Zara are the Big Bad Duumvirate of the series as a whole, remaining constant threats even as the likes of Androgon and Saloth (who'll get a post later) come and go. The archenemies of, respectively, Techbane Shivah and Sargon Soll, they act separately in the first book, with 777 allying with Androgon to conquer the Glass Wastes and then the rest of the Lost World, while Zara singlemindedly pursues Sargon, only to be met with defeat after defeat. Following Androgon's death, and the destruction of much of his and 777's army, Zara approaches the Robot-Emperor and suggests a new alliance, aimed at preventing Shivah, Sargon, and King Rajan from putting the Lost World back together, and unlocking the secrets of the starship for themselves. This alliance lasts for the rest of the series, and eventually develops weirdly romantic undertones as 777 and Zara become increasingly dependent on one another for emotional support. I don't have all the details for how things progress after Books 1 & 2, but I do know the end of the series will feature the two of them fusing together and gaining control of the ship's technology, essentially becoming a cybernetic god who acts as the Final Boss of the series.
Backstory: 777 was just another Hunter-Killer robot in the service of a minor warlord until, two years after his activation, he encountered the last remaining Techbanes—Shivah and her mother. He killed the latter in single combat—mostly by luck—and in doing so, earned a reputation that brought other robots flocking to him. He betrayed the warlord he served, and retreated to the Glass Wastes where he set himself up as one warlord among many, and began upgrading his body with every piece of weaponry he could find.
Zara was the youngest child of Zandrel, warlord and old school mystic. Loathing Rogue Technology, Zandrel found Zara's ability to manipulate it to be embarrassing at best, disturbing at worst, and refused to take her into his confidence. Determined to prove herself, Zara got one of her brother's to train her in non-mystical combat and became one of her father's most effective officers—though unbeknownst to him, she still regularly used her technopathy to help him, just subtlety. She played an instrumental role in her father's defeat and capture of Sargon Soll, and believed the time was coming when she would be able to get Zandrel to rethink her usefulness and trust her completely. Then Sargon escaped and killed him, blowing her life apart.
Relevant tropes: A God Am I (in the end), Arch-Enemy (to Shivah and Sargon), Big Bad Duumvirate, Cyborg (Zara), The Emperor (777), Evil Sorcerer (777 as of Book 2), From Nobody to Nightmare (777), Fusion Dance (in the final book), It's Personal (with Shivah and Sargon), Mister Exposition (777 plays this role for Androgon in Book 1), Robotic Psychopath (777), Technopath (Zara), Unholy Matrimony (eventually), Villain Team-Up (777 teams first with Androgon, then Zara)
edited 31st Jul '15 9:33:16 AM by AmbarSonofDeshar
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Thanks, and, sounds pretty interesting, can you, maybe detail Merle's past a bit more, he sounds like he can be really interesting, I mean, no one is born a weapon. Also, does anything really go on in his head, I mean, he seems to have some interesting feelings, at the very least he feels unworthy of forgiveness, it'd be nice to know his other thoughts.
Yeah, I actually noticed this too, although I figured it really shouldn't make a difference. In regards to Lust, the reason for her name is, honestly, because Selick can be a sadistic bastard at times. Basically, all of the Sins have names ironically based on their deaths, Envy was the son of an elf and a human, with his human father abusing and eventually killing his mother and then himself, En was also constantly bullied by both humans and elves and finally ended his own life, which is when Selick found him. Pride was once the empress of a great army, when the Y'saer came to conquer her kingdom she refused to back down, finally being executed when she refused to bow to Sala Anandil when she surrendered. Wrath was trying to avenge the death of his son, dying in the process after cutting down 30 men in a single battle. Sloth was a spy that was tied down and tortured for six months, Gluttony was a weak and diseased Orc left to starve in the wastes, Greed was a thief killed by his own brother, and finally Lust, Lust was a beautiful and kind women sought after by many suitors, upon marrying, a jealous suitor strangled her to death, Selick naming her accordingly. Also, it's not so much that she turned good because she's a woman (the leader and most amoral and sociopathic member of the group, is Pride), it was more because she dealt with mortals on a personal level in the group and began desiring true bonds like they had.
In regards to your villains, interesting, neither are human and their seems to be a lost of emphasis on technology I this story, so, I'm assuming it takes place After the End? How far into the future? Or is it the distant past? Also, interesting that they began forming a relation ship, 777 and Zara, usually villians in a Big Bad Duumvirate are just waiting to screw each other over.
Name: Selick
Age: 243 (physically about 35-40)
Appearance: Has long black hair with one bang covering his right eye. Right eye has a vertical scar crossing over it. Physically between the ages of 35 and 40. Has pale skin, a slim figure, and is very tale. Eyes are a piercing pale blue color. Doesn't have a beard but his chin is covered in stubble. Has a calm, apathetic glazed look on his face. Wears a tan great coat under a large black cloak.
Personality: Has a calm, uncaring exterior. Despite his deep voice, Selick is often soft spoken, whether it's talking casually or issuing an execution. This indifference even extends to his battles, often taking lazy swings, and looking disinterested throughout the entire fight. This hides a far worse inner personality however. Internally, Selick is an insane, cynical, sadistic, depressive, and psychotic man. This personality only comes up during fights with powerful opponents, in which he'll go from his usual persona to the psychotic one, going so far as to rant, shout, and laugh maniacally during fights.
Abilities: Selick is an expert swordsman, wielding his long blade in battle and effortlessly cutting down opponents. Is capable of both willed and winged flight. As the son of an angel and arch-demon, Selick has a powerful blend of the abilities of both, swinging massive energy blasts at opponents and enhancing all of his blade strokes. His right eye was replaced with one of his father's eyes, with the ability to perceive movements, emotions, and energy of opponents, giving him the ability to sense, guard for strikes before their thrown, and tell whether one is an enemy or friend.
Weaknesses: Unlike the Sins, Selick is not powered by a soul gem and only has one life to lose. Is also incapable of sensing the emotional state of the aforementioned Sins. Can be overconfident in battle and starts getting sloppy once sufficiently angered.
Goals: Gain the power of God and destroy this reality to create his own, "perfect" one
Motivations: Angels killed his mother, his village, and manipulated him into killing his father, convincing him that, if even the good guys were monsters, reality is hell.
Role: The Big Bad of Fallen and the Mage.
Background: When he was very young, Selick's mother took him and fled to the mortal realm (in the spirit realm, any angel spawns a half-blood is to be put to death). They settled in a medium-sized human village and led a happy life. Selick was growing in strength every day. One day, when he was a man of about 23, Selick's village was razed to the ground and his mother was killed. Selick found evidence that his father, Zaleal, one of the original fallen angels, was behind the attack. Selick trained hard for the next couple of years, eventually confronting and killing his father. After sensing all was not what it seemed, Selick used his father's eyes to discover a horrifying truth, the Angels were responsible for all of this. Selick's mind tore and his heart filled with hatred. Soon enough, Selick decided that, even if the Angels were such monsters than reality must be hell, and set out to create his own and make it a paradise. Over time, his reasons warped until he was eventually just mindlessly following the plan and wanted power.
Tropes
- Above Good and Evil: How he presents himself
- A God Am I: Extremely arrogant, viewing every other being in existence as below him, and believing that he should be the one to control their fates. After actually gaining the power he gleefully and arrogantly refers to himself as "God".
- Became Their Own Antithesis: Wanted to become God, became Satan instead.
- The Big Bad: The main villain of Fallen and the Greater-Scope Villain of The Mage
- Bad Boss: The Sins are completely terrified of him and incurring his wrath
- Black Magic: Relies on this when David gains the upper hand in The Final Battle
- The Chessmaster: Manipulates just about everything in the background and is responsible for most of what goes wrong in the story, either directly or indirectly.
- Combat Sadomasochist: Upon achieving God-like power, he becomes this, allowing himself to be wounded while laughing psychotically.
- Embodiment of Vice: Despite his feelings of perfection, he embodies all of them.
- Is extremely arrogant and proud - Pride
- becomes a berserker in combat - Wrath
- desperately desires God's power - Envy
- wants nothing more than power - Lust (for power)
- hoards a large amount of soul gems with him - Greed
- has the Sins do all the dirty work - Sloth
- and drains the energy from his soul gems for sustenance - Gluttony
- Evil Counterpart: Is this to David, both are half angel and half demon, both were sought after by demons and the Angels that wanted them dead, and both changed the spirit realm by their presence.
- Evil Is Not a Toy: Learns this the hard way when he gets trapped in a Fate Worse than Death due to messing around with the Darkness, The Ultimate Evil in the setting.
- The Dark Side Will Make You Forget: Originally devised his plan to create a paradise opposite of the reality he thought was hell, eventually just wants power and is willing to destroy all of reality in its pursuit.
- Evil Mentor: Tries to subtlety pull this on David, but drops the act once he assesses David as a threat that would be better off dead.
- Evil Only Has to Win Once: Well, when your plan is the destruction of all reality...
- Face–Heel Turn: Was once a noble hero, even if sought after by angel and demon alike, eventually twisted into a cruel, bitter old man who ultimately cares for nothing but himself.
- Fallen Hero: A truly sad example, he was once a powerful warrior, regularly defeating powerful demons and other evil beings, and then he had One Bad Day...
- Faux Affably Evil: Pretends to be kind and friendly to garner support, when, in reality he couldn't possibly care less and would kill you all the same.
- Evil Sounds Deep: Has a very deep voice
- Greater-Scope Villain: For most of The Mage
- Good Scars, Evil Scars: Has a vertical scar over his right eye
- Hope Crusher: How he convinces people to his side
- Lack of Empathy: By the time he appears in the story, he's been isolated and caught up in plotting for so long he can barely interact normally when pretending to be good, when he gives up the facade he's emotionless and doesn't even care about what happens to the Sins leading Lust and Greed to defect, with Gluttony considering joining them and Pride secretly acting as The Starscream. In the end, the only ones loyal to him are Wrath who was a soldier and is deeply loyal, Envy who desperately wants a family, and Sloth who doesn't care.
- Manipulative Bastard: There are only two types of people in this world, tools and enemies
- Moral Event Horizon: Whether it be between calling for the slaughter of entire towns, being the mastermind behind the second war in heaven, causing the War of Apoclaypse, turning the Sins into monsters, or attempting to kill David after pretending to smooth him, Selick has a lot of moments.
- Moral Myopia: His trying to destroy all reality is sane and justified, but the Angels trying to take him out as a threat is far worse.
- Omnicidal Maniac: His true goal involves the destruction of all reality, although, not even the Sins are actually aware of this.
- Outside-Context Villain: Despite being The Heavy, with Fallen focusing on the conflict between the Angels and Demons, and The Mage featuring stprylines centered around arc villains, Selick and the Seven Sins come off as this, randomly entering and being the biggest threats in both series.
- Really 700 Years Old: Is 243, looks about 35 or so
- Redemption Rejection: David gives him one chance to walk away, he refuses, however.
- Satanic Archetype:
- Wants the power of God, check
- Rules his own legion of evil beings (the Sins), check
- Said evil beings are even named after the Seven Deadly Sins
- Extremely arrogant, check
- Corrupts people to his side, check
- Screws over those same people he makes deals with, friggin check
- Was once a noble hero, now fallen from grace, check
- Straw Nihilist: Views reality as empty and pointless, and feels no qualms in destroying all of it
- Used to Be a Sweet Kid: Was a sweet and happy child, the opposite of the man he grew into
- Utopia Justifies the Means: at least originally, by now, Selick cares more for power
- Villains Want Mercy: Averted, in the end, as he's dragged to a Fate Worse than Death, instead of kicking and screaming he arrogantly proclaims himself a god, cursing and vowing to destroy the being dragging him to the very end.
edited 31st Jul '15 6:46:34 AM by OmniGoat
This shall be my true, Start of DarknessI'll go through your![]()
and your
entries a bit later.
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Thanks for the insight. I'm still not quite sure about what to make of Merle myself. He originally began as a kind of fill-in generic super scary henchman, so there's a lot left to do about him I guess. The more literal breaking down using magic or technology as you suggest sounds interesting enough, since the setting is more or less dominated by spellcasters and artificers, I want to keep Merle as a more mundane kind of monster for contrast. I'll definitely keep the possibility in mind of course.
Also, the lack of intimidating factor of his name is deliberate. I just like the name
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Well the thing about Merle as of now is that he serves Aisel, and Aisel is quite different from her late mother. Add to that as well that Aisel's mother was an abusive figure to everyone, her daughter included. A Lso, while true that she's still a complete bitch, but Aisel doesn't constantly threaten or torment Merle since she actually likes the man. She chooses him to be practically her personal assassin because she sees that the man expresses himself best killing people, so she does care for him, even if only a little. In turn, Merle doesn't particularly holds grudge against Aisel, so outright betrayal is not in my plan for him as of yet, especially considering that I don't even have a plan for his son Anton now. It may eventually be the case, though. I'm not quite sure where I'm going with him myself.
The thing about is past is exactly that, though. I want to keep it a bit obscured, with the only real conclusion from it being that he's not a bad man per se, but has done a lot of bad things in his life. As for what goes on in his head, I'd say it's at most mostly incoherent. He's not all there after all. Even the sense of guilt isn't really there anymore. But now that you ask, it's an interesting thing to think through indeed. I'll have to do some more homework with him. Thanks for the comment.
edited 31st Jul '15 9:25:38 AM by arreimil
On the foundation of glass a dream is built. And, like glass, it shatters.@Omni Goat
The setting for the story 777 and Zara hail from is a standard fantasy world that got thrown into total chaos when an alien starship crash landed in the midst of the continent, turning vast swathes of it to glass (hence the Glass Wastes), and knocking society back to Stone Age levels, even as it unleashed new forms of high technology (referred to as Rogue Technology) into the setting. You can read some more about it in Androgon the Twice-Damned
, Shivah
, and Sargon Soll
's entries.
Will post more on your character later.
I already posted my critique above, so I'll jump right into mine.
Note: this is very spoiler-heavy for The Fire Child concept. If I were to spoiler-tag everything it'd just all be whited out.
Name: Zuhal/Sun Emperor Akharet
Age: Naturally in his early twenties, though he's Back from the Dead after about 2000 years spent in hell.
Appearance: Fellow jinn would consider Akharet very handsome. He is tall and lithe, and his skin is a deep crimson red color. Like other jinn, his eyes glow a bright red most of the time. In his demonic-powered Super Mode, he turns dark purple instead of red, and gains two large bat wings.
Personality: In his natural life, Akharet was very charming and personable, and a voice of progressiveness in a tradition-mired empire. He was genuinely interested in the ways and culture of the humans ruled by the jinn empire of Kumat, and sought to improve their situation. Centuries - no, millennia - of imprisonment in hell by the very humans he tried so hard to befriend, however, has left him a bitter shell of his old self whose near entire existence is defined by pain. He can retain his charm as a mask, however, as shown by his ability to found the Afarit.
Abilities: Like all jinn, he has a special affinity for the element of fire; fire bends to his will, and he is immune to damage from heat. As a prince of Kumat, he was trained in combat and was a successful military officer during his time. What makes Akharet unique, however, is the 2000 years he spent in the demonic realm; the energy of the demonic magic seeped into him and gave him power over black and corrupt magic.
Weaknesses: Like anyone driven primarily by vengeance and bitterness, his morale and motivation are hollow, especially compared to those who are fighting for a cause or to defend their homes. Also, despite his new demon-powered abilities, his magic is still quite limited compared to that of a human mage; human mages can wield large varieties of magic that serve many different purposes.
Goals and Motivation: When Akharet is released from hell by jinn running experiments on how to use Ley Linesnote , he assumes the name Zuhal (after a mythic figurenote ) and promises to invade the human world to reclaim the lost glory of Kumat, the empire ruled by jinn thousands of years ago that stretched over much of the known world. Many jinn follow him and they become known as the Afarit. In truth, however, Akharet doesn't care a whit about any of that. After millennia in hell, what drives him is vengeance. Vengeance for his kingdom. Vengeance for his brother. And vengeance for himself, forced to pay a terrible price for crimes he barely had a tertiary hand in.
Role in the Story: The Big Bad; he invades the human world with an army of fanatical jinn to reclaim the ancestral lands of Kumat. In particular, at the end of the first part, he gets a major Kick the Dog moment when he kills deuteragonist Khaleer and uses his body to create the Shadow Hunter.
Backstory: Born over 2000 years ago in the Kumatite capital of Owaset, Akharet was the second son of Sun Emperor Setakh, and younger brother to Crown Prince Asaris. As the Spare to the Throne, he was raised thinking he would never be Sun Emperor, and the desire to be so never really entered his mind. He and Asaris were very close, and it was understood that the tactically minded Akharet would become the commander of Asaris' armies when the latter ascended the throne. As mentioned above, the second-born had a progressive mind and often traveled the lands ruled by his father to better understand the humans, who were ruled with an iron fist by the jinn.
Akharet was appalled by how the subjects of his father's crown were treated, and drafted up several reforms to improve the humans' lot, but his conservative and supremacist father dismissed them, and though Asaris was willing to listen, he could do little of consequence since the throne was not yet his. Akharet did his best to improve the humans' lives how he could — but unfortunately for him, his brother, his dynasty, and the entire Empire of Kumat, his actions were too little, too late. Finally fed up with the oppression they faced under Kumatite rule, the humans rose up in a rebellion, and Asaris was assassinated, the war's first casualty. The shock of the rebellion and the loss of his firstborn was enough to drive Setakh to take his own life, and suddenly, Akharet was Sun Emperor.
Now thrust into a position he'd never prepared for, and didn't even want, Akharet was faced with a cruel choice: fight against the humans he'd spent so many years befriending, or be destroyed. The Kumatite jinn fought hard for several years, but their leader's heart was not in the fight, and in the end, Kumat fell to the armies of human soldiers and mages. Unfortunately for Akharet, his human enemies were less conflicted about the war. When the Astavarian mages stormed the palace of Owaset, they decided quickly that mere death was not enough for the face of their oppression, heedless of the fact that Akharet had been the only one trying to aid them. Despite all his efforts, the mages performed a ritual that sent him bodily into the darkest depths of hell, to be hunted and, if caught, tortured by demons for all eternity.
Akharet felt betrayed and swore revenge on the humans immediately, if only in a purely symbolic way; he never imagined he could escape to exact it. His mental state was further exacerbated by the 2000 years he spent on the run, evading the demons that wanted to capture and torture him to feed off his suffering. Consumed by fear of capture and torture, he successfully evaded them for two millennia, but even a mentally strong person's mind could not survive that kind of all-consuming terror for that long. When an experiment by the jinn to harness Ley Lines power accidentally creates a portal to hell, Akharet used it to escape and exact his designs for revenge on the human kingdoms who betrayed him.
Relevant Tropes
- Anti-Villain: Akharet tried to make things better. He really did. But unfortunately for him, he was the Sun Emperor, and people wanted to see him suffer.
- Being Tortured Makes You Evil: Or rather, the all-consuming fear of being tortured does. That experience destroys Akharet's psyche to the point where there's nothing left of him but revenge.
- The Dark Arts: Learned to use demonic magic when demonic energy was all around him.
- Dark Messiah: What the Afarit see him as. However, he doesn't buy into his own rhetoric.
- Death Seeker: Ultimately realizes that what he truly wants is the peace of true death. When Mahrib corners him, and it looks like the stage is set for the Final Battle...he simply surrenders and asks Mahrib to kill him, as he has endured far beyond his time.
- Dragged Off to Hell
- Fate Worse than Death: Being sent bodily into a realm where one will be hunted for all eternity, and if captured, tortured for all eternity, certainly qualifies.
- Foil: To protagonist Mahrib Qasan in a number of ways, most notably being that they are both half-jinn (Mahrib being half human, Akharet being half demon), and both were thrust into positions of power and influence despite not being prepared for it.
- Playing with Fire: Like all jinn.
- Spare to the Throne: Asaris was supposed to be Sun Emperor, not him. Fate didn't turn out that way.
- Super Mode: He can transform into more demonic form that increases the power of his demonic magic (and, while he was in hell, allowed him to camouflage among the demons).
- You Are in Command Now: Becomes Sun Emperor when his brother his killed and his father commits suicide in turn.
edited 31st Jul '15 9:38:07 PM by somerandomdude
ok boomer@ Ambar: Has Androgon given any thought to repentance? That's usually how one escapes damnation.
- Name: Dullahan
- Age:330
- Appearance: A suit of armour wearing a cape, with a pair of glowing, intangible eyes hovering over it.
- Personality: Cold, methodical, and vicious
- Abilities: The standard hate-based package of Anti-Magic and Make Them Rot that comes from being a Revenant.
- Weaknesses: Fire and Light
- Goals: Punishing an oppressor state ( Equestria) for enslaving mankind.
- Motivation: Revenge
- Role in the story: The Dragon to the Revenant Prince.
- Backstory: When the Prince was killed, General Dullahan was the Captain of the Praetorian Guard. He was killed by way of magic bolt to the back by an infiltrator; whereupon his corpse was impaled and displayed on the tallest tower of the Citadel to break the defender's morale. Three hundred years later, the Mass Ressurection of Mankind brought him back to life as a Revenant Shade.
- Relevant Tropes:
- 24-Hour Armor/Clingy Costume: His armour is more or less his skin.
- The Big Guy: Much bigger than the Prince.
- The Dragon
- Dead Guy on Display
- Creepy Souvenir: The skulls of his enemies.
- The Faceless
- Off with His Head!: I want his skull for my collection!
- Skeletons in the Coat Closet: Has skulls as spaulders, kneepads, and elbow pads; as well as his belt. he later gains a skull for a breastplate.
- Tin Tyrant
- "Uh-Oh" Eyes: The only facial feature he still possesses.
edited 31st Jul '15 10:26:09 PM by dvorak
Now everyone pat me on the back and tell me how clever I am!
I can critique when I have spare time. I'll edit this post with one.
Selick seems truly evil, and definitely not to be messed with. I haven't seen too many villains who end up a very dark shade of black, so I commend you on that. His role is also very symbolic, with his ties to the Seven Deadly Sins and is basically a Satan metaphor, which is quite interesting.
Thing is, he's good, then something terrible happens, then suddenly he's bad? I know he probably Went Mad From The Revelation, but I don't see how it connects to him seeking power. Maybe it's because his turn to darkness seems very quick- I've seen some characters go through hell and back and still stay pretty moral. Maybe he was originally most like his current exterior— quiet, somewhat apathetic, then his darkness comes up. But maybe you should probably consider what ends up contorting his goal, then add it to the backstory.
edited 1st Aug '15 10:46:43 AM by electronic-tragedy
Life is hard, that's why no one survives.![]()
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Me too Omni Goat.
Selik look like a cool villain, he really is despricable. The sad thing about him is... the lost potential. I like this guy, A Fallen Hero and a Satanic Archetype. He lost every good thing who he had in his soul.
edited 1st Aug '15 9:26:53 AM by KazuyaProta
Watch me destroying my country![]()
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It honestly took over a hundred years for Selick to become the monster he is now. What originally happened was that his mother and village were killed, despite him being a hero, all because he was a half blood, not only that but he was the manipulated into killing his own father for it, with the Angels who he viewed as the good guys being behind everything. Originally he wanted to gain the godly power, leave reality, and make his own perfect universe, but in time he grew increasingly bitter, hateful, and twisted into what he is now. When he first Went Mad From The Revelation he wasn't even truly evil, but, his rage and lust for power corrupted him thoroughly.
Selik sound like a good Big Bad. I like it. Is tragic but despricable.
General Dullahan needs to have more to his overall character. He looks cool and he's menacing, but he needs something to his character to make him really stand out as a villain (Crocodile, Doflamingo, and Blackbeard from One Piece could be good references for you).
- Name: Mou'rew Azaran (a redoing of a previous Eclipse concept).
- Summary: As the Nemesor of Vytal, Mou'rew Azaran is an autocratic nationalist, who attempts to accumulate as much power as possible while escalating a regional conflict to suppress an entire ethnicity that oppose him. Nemesor Azaran is partly based off Recep Tayyip Erdogan, President of Turkey.
- Appearance: Azaran is a large and burly man, with pupil-less eyes, silver skin, and dark gray veins. He wears Powered Armor, with a Rage Helm that can retract.
- Personality: Nemesor Azaran is authoritarian to his core, using his majoritarian credentials as a way to treat the opposition with scorn. Drunk with Power, he is often inflammatory, reactionary, and borderline narcissistic (like creating a 1000-room palace on protected wetlands in defiance of the law). He is a sectarian nationalist, with vaguely fundamentalist leanings (believing himself to be a child of prophesy for Armigers). He sees most other groups as nuisances, at best, and targets at worst, and tries to suppress dissent as much as possible.
- Backstory: Even at a young age, Mou'rew Azaran was a notorious nationalist, bemoaning the collapse of the Savak Dynasty; the establishment of a secular cosmopolitan democracy; the nearby Culliver insurrections inflaming sectarian and ethnic tension; and the strictly secular military acting as a stabilizing force. He sought higher office in order to push through his fundamentalist and hyper-nationalist ideology onto the republic.
- Abilities: As an Armiger, Azaran utilizes his Aura in the form of Powered Armor; in this case, his arms are connected by a long wire with three square charm. He can absorb the force of, say, a punch or an energy blast, transfer the energy through the wire, and dish it right back out through the other hand. He can capture the energy within the middle square charm, which transfers the energy through both arms and out his palms. He cannot punch; only slam things with his palms.
- Goal and Motivation: Vytal was an industrial, metropolitan Steampunk city-state built on metallic alloys and minerals (iron, steel, gold, platinum, diamond, copper, etcetera); founded and run by an upper class of Armigers who built the city-state. It grew into a dynastic empire, led by the Savak Dynasty, encompassing other city-states and expanding its population beyond the Armigers. The Dynasty was deposed by the military, and Vytal's industrialization was degraded for the sake of protecting the environment and cultural landmarks; it is now more similar to an Art Deco Ancient Grome in appearance. Azaran, an Armiger himself, wants to return his nation back to the "Golden Age," before the dynasty was overthrown by the military, and he sees himself as The Chosen One to that end.
- Role in the story: He weakens the power of the secular military, tries to suppress the opposition, and wants to change the constitution in order to gain more power to himself. He wants Skuurnur gone, and he ends up helping terrorist organizations that start attacking other world powers as they try to conquer more territory on their own. He ends up attacking the one group that's fighting said terrorists back, because he is that afraid of regional autonomy given to that minority (since many of their members are within Vytal); risking a civil war within his own land as well as a region-wide conflagration.
edited 2nd Aug '15 2:07:30 AM by Serocco
In RWBY, every girl is Best Girl.He sounds pretty cool, lots of good motivation and reasoning for his actions. I always like a villain who has a clear motive and rationalization for what he's doing. I especially like that he sees himself as the Chosen One.
Here's a newer version of a character I showed you guys earlier, "The Lich". He's developed a lot thanks to RP and seems like more of a character. I'd REALLY like some feedback on this.
Name: Ambrose Lasko
Age: Died at 33. About one thousand years old or so
Personality: Originally in his life, Lasko was a narcissist and had a mild case of sociopathy. For the most part, if he loves he loves selfishly and sees people as his. His father was his means of survival and housing. Aside from moment of lost temper, Lasko was never one for senseless violence however. If he did something, he usually had a point to it. Even his magical experiments on animals took care and he made his subjects lives as comfortable as he could, as ailing and damaged animals mean poor results. He had some charm and shallow charisma, but he avoided people for the sake of his work. He is goal oriented. He is also very egotistical and arrogant and for the most part he sees no purpose in remorse and only seems to have it when it effects him. The deepest emotional reaction he ever had, was to his own death in a freak magical accident. His heroes, the sorcerers he looked up to the most were the ones behind the mysterious ancient experiment known as the 'Ancient Sin', a project in magical human experimentation that, as Lasko would find out later, created the Psi, which Lasko had long envied for their power. He felt betrayed when he met the very same sorcerers at his own afterlife trial and found that they themselves regretted their project.
His years in the afterlife have not done much for his sanity. After a bout with depression following his sentence, Lasko started studying up to find everything he could do as a lich to get power back, and make himself the super being he wanted to become in life, by making deals with humans for parts of their soul. He studied more into the 'Ancient Sin' from the tomes of history contained in Limbo, where he was imprisoned. He found out that some of his father's ancestors, who his 'strange sorcerer relatives' came from were involved in early parts of the experiment but dropped out when they got in too deep or were killed. Lasko decided that since no one else would take credit for this project, he would and he decided that the entire Psi race is "his". He spent years making deals , usually with Psi to obtain a bit of their souls and their power with it. He aimed to eventually strike deals with the powerful families in Psi society so he could properly puppet his creations as he needed to, to keep them- the products of magical and scientific achievement, alive as long as possible. Eventually he struck gold with just who he needed, Kagami Toyaka the slightly unbalanced daughter of a runaway Japanese noble and a Russian Psi family, She wanted to live as long as she could, and that's exactly what Lasko had in mind.
Lasko is highly adaptive and a quick learner, always aiming to learn exactly what he needs to stay in the game. He is somewhat insane deep down, but wiley and somewhat charming. He has an incredibly macabre sense of humor and gets a strange thrill out of getting killed in as many ways as possible, only to come back and shock humans. He's strangely proud of his "murder count". He looks down a bit at humans in general, and sees them all as toys, with the Psi and their nobles as his "favorite toys". He has a special relationship with Kagami in particular seeing her as both depraved and fascinating as well as useful. Also perhaps she reminds him of a certain someone.
And of course he still has his "enormous" ego.
Abilities: Lasko comes back every time he's killed. Poisons can get him drunk but not kill him. He has limited basic sorcery and the ability to use just about every Psi power thanks to the souls he's collected. He can effect just one person , making it so he only appears to them, having a few characteristics of a ghost but more solid.
He is very good at talking people into things and messing with their minds, having had lots of practice through the years. He's incredibly adaptable when his plans don't go his way.
Weaknesses: Lasko is incredibly egotistical and narcissistic. He can underestimate someone's ability to resist him and stand against him. He is not always good at predicting just how something will turn out and he can be overambitious in his attempts to maneuver people. His inability to understand true and genuine remorse makes it hard to always understand his puppets.
After his death he was stripped of all his magic ability, having to start from scratch in stealing what he could from people's souls, making his magic ability as an undead rather basic. He can also be weakened through the use of his true name, which is why he often introduces himself as something different with each client. The only client who knows his true name is Kagami, because of how long they've been working together, as well as select others in the Toyaka family, eventually. He cannot be rekilled but he can be contained with a powerful enough container. Goals: He wants to keep the Psi going on forever both because of their status as the result of the Ancient Sin, and Lasko's delusional belief that they're 'his'. Also he wants to keep them around to “stick it” to the creators who are ashamed of their work. Lasko sees it as his duty to keep the race going. Which also means keeping them from killing each other off in their wars. He has also recently developed a particular connection to the Toyakas. He especially wants to keep them around but he refuses to admit the true reason. He’s grown fond of Kagami. Motivation: He’s motivated by selfishness first and foremost, pushed forward by his lofty ambitions. He genuinely sees the Psi as his, and as time goes on his reasons for wanting to keep them around become more complex
Role in the story: Manipulative Bastard who pulls everyone's strings
Backstory: Lasko was once a very ambitious sorcerer , also a very bold one. He envied Psi which made him want to study sorcery to become like them- or better. He idolized the sorcerers behind the "Ancient project' also known as the Great Sin" who were said to have created a new race through their experiments. Lasko is willing to try magical experiments upon himself to make something 'amazing" out of himself. In one of his experiments he ends up calling hostile spirits which turn against him and kill him.
Lasko is sent on to the Afterdeath and facing a trial. The trial is run by the ghosts of the sorcerers behind the Ancient Experiment. Lasko, still dealing with the grief and shock of his death, hopes to flatter and bargain with them to be returned to life so he can continue his work. However he is shocked, and angered to find that they too consider the experiment a horrible abomination that cost lives. They stress the importance of remorse, which Lasko struggles with the concept of remorse as well as the concepts of altruism and empathy.
He is sentenced to be a lich and sent to Limbo, a temporary prison. Lasko spends a century in a depressive slump before he is willing to accept his state and look into what he can and cannot do. When he finds out his new abilities and opportunities for power and plans to continue his earthy work even better than ever. He also does research into the "Ancient Experiment" and finds that someone in his fathers family was involved in the early stages. Also he learns that project created Psi.
Lasko decides that he is going to claim the Psi as his own and seeks to ensure that they as a race last for a long time (for the sake of preservation, you see). Being rather manipulative he plans to make a soul trade with some of the higher ups in Psi society and be able to properly manipulate them.
Relevant Tropes: Manipulative Bastard- Very much so
Too Kinky To Torture- He loves being murdered. Loves it. Rather masochistic. However he is mostly asexual as far as attraction to people goes, only starting to fall for Kagami because of how she is similar to him- again, his ego.
(will add more later)
edited 3rd Aug '15 6:36:32 AM by JewelyJ
Hom. A little Je ne sais quoi for Dullahan...
- Being Tortured Makes You Evil: When alive, he was a pretty OK guy. Getting backstabbed and impaled ruined that. Any opponent he doesn't "collect", he has impaled and displayed.
- BFS: A greatsword.
- Catchphrase: Can none of you offer me challenge?!
- Corpse Land: His personal domain has the road lined with staked-out challengers.
- Blood Knight: Loves (for a given value of the word, considering how hard it is for positive emotions to surface in the frosty shard of obsidian where his heart used to be) to swordfight.
- Worthy Opponent: Only adds a skull to his armour if the battle is "fun" enough. The skull for his breastplate takes him a while to find; planned to be an Eviler than Thou antagonist in book II.

I want to feel sorry for him. I really really want to...and yet it fails in the face of his atrocities. Which is very good. I admire villains whose backstory is tragic but dwarfed by the evil they're committing in the present. In some ways Grant comes off as someone who simply hates the world and everyone in it, similar to a bullied child becoming a school-shooter, and lashing out at all who catch his eye. I remember Cyber-Matthew and his goal to die from some time ago, so Grant makes a nice addition to his team.
As for his powers and abilities; he's like the T-1000 on steroids, what with his shifting nanomachine body and metal exterior. The fact that he can always modify his weapon—and himself—is pretty scary since he can just think around you, and it seems his weapon arsenal is limited only by his imagination when it comes to body modification.
The only thing that I'm slightly confused about is his attitude towards his former loved ones. One of Grant's motivations seems to be just how crappy those he loved were treated. If he believes that organic baseline humans are worthless, what does that do to the memories of those he once cherished? It's not a big thing, but it just seems to raise some interesting issues.
Fear is a tyrant and a despot, more terrible than the rack, more potent than the snake. — Edgar Walllace