Classy up rap lyrics

Don't care much for thou community-sanctioned authorities of the law.

edited 28th Jan '13 2:33:42 PM by SeanMurrayI

Male siblings are tickled pink by how their own brethen is received by the public eye,
However, there is no fact thou art aware of more than which compartment their firearms are held in.

edited 28th Jan '13 10:03:26 PM by PhysicalStamina

Authorized officers of law enforcement notice your humble narrator operating his vehicular mode of transportation,
The constables are suspicious of me as they safeguard their precinct,
Consequently, these detectives are hoping to discover illegal contraband inside the transport belonging to yours truly.

edited 29th Jan '13 1:55:38 PM by SeanMurrayI

Oh, thou is begging you, provide sexual pleasure for a gentleman!

edited 4th Feb '13 12:49:11 PM by SeanMurrayI

I shall escort thou to ye candy shoppe. I shall allow thou to lick thy lolly.

edited 10th Feb '13 4:18:17 PM by Danniiee

Man, this game needs more loving...

In the apparel belonging to one's forefather, thou is adorned,
To the outside observer, my appearance is incogitable.
Thou wears the indicated personal outerwear with the oversized posterior,
Discovered at the one discount emporium on the avenue, at a distance from where thou is currently situated.

edited 30th Jun '13 8:20:45 PM by SeanMurrayI

I am fond of large posteriors, and I am incapable of uttering a falsehood.

Didn't I say this once before?

California is well informed in what manner one should organize a social gathering,
I repeat: California is aware of the proper format for festive occasions.
Within the metropolitan area known as Los Angeles,
Within the urban region recognized as fine aged Watts,
Within the residential zone designated Compton,
All thou prolong the flow of the rock!
All thou maintain the rocking status!

edited 30th Jun '13 8:56:02 PM by SeanMurrayI

Sorry, didn't read through the thread first. I'll leave now...

I have ensured that you become attached to the authenticity
My companion and I are notorious, thy knowest who we are
Certified Oxford slayers
The violent group arrives prepared to engage in war, heed cautiously
My relatives who partake in criminal activity who hath a boundless supply of ammunition to distribute
For anyone who wisheth to stereotype and put on a false persona
I shall swing my fist into thy face, and puncture thy cranium with the bone located in thy nose
Thou art left by thyself on these alleyways, fellow
All men shall fend for himself, for in this world, we participate in the use of firearms
And ensure that shaken armies insist on fleeing, as they are meant to do
They may approach, but they do not ever reach a point anywhere near our level
I can spot this feeling inside of your face, thou art the incorrect territory
Dastards resembling thee are simply subjected to having their entire body defiled
With marks left from arrowheads and other such weaponry
etc.

Yeah, I'm tired of this now

edited 30th Jun '13 10:24:43 PM by PhysicalStamina

First, followed in succession by the second, third, and fourth,
All thou who are inebriated occupy the ground canvas reserved for moving one's body to the rhythms of music.
The hindquarters of an underaged female agitates as if the girl has increased desire,
As if the girl were a devoted enthusiast who would offer herself to me at a time when thou has not embarked on an excursion.
It is feasible to assume this is on account of the girl discovering the fact that thou is an expert at ending sentences with similar sounds,
Conversely, there is a possibility this is the result of the girl learning that yours truly comes into possession of all the goods sold at business establishments.
The second half of the final inning in a game of baseball and a brother must tally points,
In the event of failure, it is thou's duty to proceed with the following prostitute.

The final countdown is upon us now,
My friend has become confused, he is unaware I am in possession of a penis.
In the event that I am in the mood for intercourse, all thou carry out assorted acts for pleasure,
Supposing that you cannot find a partner, it is in your best interest to vacate.
Suddenly, thou is in a private room receiving oral pleasure from my ladies,
As the female performs this act, I am in the process of outlining this very story for you.
In her mouth, the female takes in the penis belonging to my person while informing me that this is not enjoyable for her,
Woman, return my penis to me; at this moment, you cannot have it.

Right away, all thou inside the discotheque are in the process of liquoring up,
Each person occupying this nightspot is engaged in intoxication.

edited 1st Jul '13 1:09:51 PM by SeanMurrayI

A foreign party has erroneously claimed that I ought to refrain from rapping regarding my subjection to relative poverty
However, they have not claimed that I am incapable to thereby rap about cocaine

(COR BLIMEY!) Degenerate harlot, you incorrectly assume that I will not forcefully asphyxiate a wench
Until the twin infoldings of oscillating mucous membranous tissue cease functionality within her tracheal structure?!

(COR BLIMEY!) These mater fornicators surmise that I am acting in jest\

Postulating that I am uttering inanities from dark recesses of my mind for the purpose of vocalizing them

(COR BLIMEY!) Kindly lower your hands you foul she-devil, I shall not fire a lead projectile into you
I will yank you downwards and perforate you with said unfired lead projectile!

(COR BLIMEY!) Take hold of your tongue you loathsome strumpet for you are subjecting our surroundings to much pandemonium

RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE DEAREST THREAD!

edited 11th Dec '13 3:34:15 PM by Prometheus136

Cease this... I interject,
In consideration of our African-American brethren who perceive ourselves as being flaccid.
Our group refrains from... clowning around,
All of us plan to to agitate for as long as it takes before the means of mobility collapse.
Desist... I exclaim,
In the name of inner-city racial peers belonging to yours truly masquerading as the brazen.
Acquire a... space to rest your posterior,
Find faith in your preparedness for the forthcoming serialized chapter.

Inhale cannabis fumes on a frequent basis.

edited 12th Dec '13 6:29:53 AM by SeanMurrayI

Musta Barbaari -- Salil eka salil vika

My most respected brother, Whosoever it may be that proposed it be plausible, or indeed possible at all, to yield profit without contributing the toil and effort of planting the seed and tilling the land, it is my heartfelt advice for you to not believe such a fanciful fantasy.

I am, after all, the Black Barbarian; and verily the good sirs about town do not call me 'nigger'; instead I am known to them as the most impressively built piece of liquorice that can be found in all of Helsinki; and while I linger on the topic of 'niggers', let me remind you, my dearest brother, how it is said a 'nigger' will never perish.

As the night is coated in an unbroken veil of darkness, so is my own skin; and every night as I lie resting, in the dream the spirit of revered Tupac finds me and addresses me thus: "Lend me your ear, oh brother, for what I am about to say is the veritable truth: the white man will not find it in himself to pay you your deserved respect before your physical form verily impresses them." This vision stirred me from my sleep and brought beads of perspiration upon my brow; and I cried out in my triump of realisation that indeed I was, by goodnesses' sake, alive! What had transpired greatly inspired me to try and perfect my physique as far as my health and the good fortune should allow.

In my daily life it is not rare at all for me to find that many of the white aboriginals I encounter would harbour thought of sending me, in their interpretation an indubitable barbarian, back to his place of African origin. No degree of emphasis would be excessive when I swear to you that returning most definitely is not an option that I would ever regard in seriousness. Not even the sturdiest of cages, that should safely hold a rhinoceros or other such beast of formidable might, could restrain me now; let that be the measure of how exceedingly strong and how thoroughly black I am.

No other motivation is needed at this moment: after all, I am, if those who scorn me should be believed, a wicked black devil, not a friend. That being said, nothing will be gained without enduring some pain, and this in mind I have no objection to stay overnight at the gymnastic hall if need be. I spend all of my waking hours training my physique; and I draw my sustenance from the social security benefits. This bothers not my conscious; after all am I not carrying, each day, the most immense burden that can befall a man in this Northern country of reserved Finns who doubt anything that is new to them: and that burden is to be of black-skinned persuasion.

In case of you should find yourself in financial hardship yet fancy the thought of owning a Bentley-made auto-car, simply take your person to the nearest money-lender to benefit from his expertise, or otherwise do whatever it might be you find profitable; after all you are yet alive and indeed many possibilities are open to you by that blessing alone.

My own life has now been strictly dictated by the mandates of physical improvement; the figure of Tupac did, after all, visit me in a nightly vision and persuaded me to work hard. Indeed, I now visit the gymnastic hall regularly to widen my frame; and I wear nothing but black even as I do not associate myself with the listeners of that musical form characterised by harsh pounding of various percussive instruments as well as strained yowls of electrically enloudened guitars, and is known by the moniker of 'Heavy Metal' to those more familiar with youthful musical culture. In the lifting of weighs, I find myself an artist of sorts; my body being my canvas and the weighs being the brush.

Should you happen upon me and wish to communicate our brotherhood, greet me not by the hat-tipping or head-nodding customs of white men; instead, pierce the air with your dark fist. However if I should find reason to not consider you appreciably built, be not surprised if I fail to greet you in likewise manner. Let it, however, never be said—even though I envaluate my fellow men by their committed to the art of muscular improvement—that I would ever let racial matters affect my preference: after all, my chauffeur, whom I am not ashamed to mention I greatly respect, is of the paler persuasion.

If I may try your patience for a short while yet, I'd like to comment the intense specialisation found of my training programme: only weight lifting, without any machinery, even as simple as merely guiding the path of lifting or offering support; and not a step taken on the rotatory running carpet—why should I have any need for such after the years I spent in home Africa, rescuing myself from the attacks of the fiercest of lions by the method of quick foot alone: such was my speed that I never had reason to fear. Am I not the truest of any brother who has lived after the time of Tupac?

Without any need for closer investigation, it has become evident to me that the trouble you have with sculpting upon your bones a harmonious form, communicating power and excellent health, is firmly and fruitfully rooted in the thought that so easily deceives the wisest of men; the impatience if I may say so; the naïve hope that such a feat may be accomplished without paying the heavy, and indeed, ever increasing toll of labour and pain. This sentiment, my brother, is richly deserving of utmost disregard. Cardinal, nay, crucial, to your ambitions, is an unerodable resolution to each day begin your workings-out when all your peers are yet to arrive to the training grounds, and also only retire to rest after they have left.

It is my dearesty hope that these words have offered you comfort and guidance; and let it be repeated once more: a black man will not ever perish.

edited 12th Dec '13 7:35:19 AM by peccantis

Hello there, children. Do you enjoy observing others experience severe pain?

Would you enjoy this pun referencing an industrial rock group, and also referencing the previous line?

Would you like to mimic my actions, despite me not being presented as a worthy role model?

If you would, would you later try a drug and then be forced into a poor position in society, such as the one that I am currently in?

All the various neurons in my brain are nonfunctional and serve no purpose.

I am trying to get a balanced view on this situation,

But I am unsure of which member of a terrible pop group I should perform conjugal acts with and thereby cause a scandal.

And my friend, the good Doctor Dre who is also a rapper much like me, said

"Slim Shady, you are addicted to drugs."

I respectfully disagree with you on that opinion, Doctor Dre.

"Well, if you are as sober as you claim to be, then what is the explanation for your red face, which is a telltale sign of drinking? In fact, I believe you to be drunk."

Ever since I was a boy of twelve I have had suspicions that I was a different person than I am currently.

This may have something to do with the fact that around that time I killed my original "self" in a very personal way with a clothing item.

In an amusing anecdote, I at one time became very upset with Pamela Anderson, who was a star on Baywatch, and I attacked her, removing her breast implants from her body.

Once I had done that, I then proceeded to attack her in such a way as to position her clothing in the way opposite the norm, similarly to Kris Kross.

I occasionally consume a humorously overly large amount of drugs, which causes me to experience dizziness and collapse.

It occurs even quicker than the collapsing of an overweight woman who accidentally sits down far faster than her burdensome frame allows.

Woman, come over here. I am implying I would like to perform sexual acts with you.

"Sir, I am afraid you cannot do that, because that woman has already expressed a romantic interest in me and therefore is not able to do that for you."

Well, I am afraid that I do not much care for the rules set for me by society.

I believe that my deity has given me a specific purpose in life, and that purpose is to confuse, bewilder, and irritate everybody whom I meet.

Human females amount to nil and therefore ought to be assumed to be but simple harlots and mere charlatans

Maneuver your sustenance-manipulating muscular hydrostat to pass its moist body over these male gonads and engage your mouth to enact suction procedures upon the shaft of the male intromittent organ

Upon completion of said deed kindly remove yourself from the premises posthaste
I place my conviction in my motorized escape apparatus to speed me out of the grasp of devilment...

I was lounging within my domicile in possession of an erect penis,
Thus your humble narrator fetched a personal index of women's phone numbers in search of a bimbo with whom to arrange a meeting.
I acquired my call transmitter, following this I entered half a dozen plus one integers,
Announced, "Salutations, little doll, Marquis is I! Does thou approve of my attractiveness?"
My person reached a destination in the vicinity of the abode belonging to the woman, and beat on the entryway,
I possess not one notion of that which may be forthcoming during these evening hours.

My behavior is akin to that of a canine with sexual desire, a maniac lacking prior notice to a potential incident,
Your humble narrator bears a yearning for fornication, on the account of yours truly being considerably libidinous!

edited 12th Dec '13 2:48:09 PM by SeanMurrayI

(Salutations Soulja Boy, may I please receive your personal signature on a intimate item in my possession?) Undeniably, female canine, verily!

(Halloo, Arab, I quite fancy your personal attributes, my brother) Indeed, female canine, indeeeed!

(Are there any thirty young males that...) Verily, veritably, female canine, indeed indeeeeed!

(Aye, I happened to be contemplating if I could be on your next) Indubitably, verily, female canine!

Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage, harlot
Remove yourself from my visage (Indubitably!)

edited 15th Dec '13 3:44:12 PM by Prometheus136

A little something for the holidays...

The story I share with you now begins during the evening hours of the 24th designated day of the final month of the Gregorian calendar on the promenade known as "Hollis",
At which time your humble narrator observed a male human being relaxing in the company of a canine in his possession in the vicinity of the public lawn.
Yours truly moved nearer to the pairing at a considerably gradual pace as anxiety permeated my essence,
I gazed upon the canine, to my surprise as I blaspheme the name of my Lord, this is a marvelous Rangifer tarandus!

However, my person felt nervous on account that the individual was in possession of facial hair,
In addition to a pouch container loaded with prizes, The midnight hour approached.
Consequentially, my cranium rotated for a brief moment, then this person disappeared,
However, thou surely accidentally relinquished the billfold which rightfully belongs to his person right in the middle of the grass field.

Your humble narrator retrieved the billfold, whence I seized a moment's hesitation,
And removed the identification card which plain as day read Kriss Kringle.
An agglomeration of currency stored in the item, indisputable capital measuring in the thousands,
Adequate for purchase of a sea-faring vehicle in addition to a paired automobile without difficulty.

However, yours truly would not in the least plunder at the expense of St. Nick, on account of such an act being amoral,
Thus my intentions were to return to my domicile to deliver the wallet to its rightful owner on the particular evening.
Nonetheless, upon my arrival at my residence, my person became startled, on account that beneath the holiday timber,
There lay a missive left by Kriss Kringle, as a consequence the legal tender belonged to yours truly!

edited 16th Dec '13 1:54:54 PM by SeanMurrayI

Two years prior to this date, an acquaintance of mine requested I recite a bit of gentlemanly poetry.
In response, I obliged him and began to recite the verse which I will present to you shortly.
I must say, it was indeed a splendid verse. It went like this...