KyleJacobs
from DC - Southern efficiency, Northern charm
Since: Mar, 2011
Relationship Status: One True Dodecahedron
#2: May 22nd 2012 at 1:03:18 AM
Just from the first few pages I can tell you you'll need a whole lot of style fixes. It alternates between being overly chatty and not giving enough information. First off, I don't like to see the word "I" in a rulebook. It makes it look unprofessional. I've left comments where I think things can be improved on.
Now, style aside, the rules do look sound. This could be interesting.
edited 22nd May '12 1:21:34 AM by KyleJacobs
AdmiralDuh
Since: Dec, 1969
KyleJacobs
from DC - Southern efficiency, Northern charm
Since: Mar, 2011
Relationship Status: One True Dodecahedron
AdmiralDuh
Since: Dec, 1969
Total posts: 5

I got this, handle cause it's a little more appropriate for my project. Here it is. Look, Review, Bash, I don't care as long as I can improve it.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yGjTXVgyyd9ZLGW-tfuZltsQTXpH8dDF2nf_Yt8HZ2Q/edit