The Villa Evil
(Just stares blearily up at Peter, bemused.)
...A "spider man"...? Come now, you don't have nearly enough legs to pull that off...
(SHIT SHIT SHIT BUNCHA SPIDERS CRAWLING UP YOUR NECK, BARON NOT!PIZZA PARKER TRYING TO GRAPPLE YOU FROM BEHIND)
(KKRRRRRKKK—! That... Yeah, that did it. Bitch is in pieces on the ground, weakly twitching and trying to crawl towards Archer with a hateful scowl, but ahahahaha, crawling is hard when you're in so many pieces.)
...brotherrrrrrrrrrhhh...
(THUD! Beelzegrub falls to the ground after taking so many shots, but grabs Orion's ankle with its proboscis and tries to drag her towards it.)
edited 13th Jan '17 6:56:09 PM by MobileLeprechaun
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019Hey, a guy comes in and starts spinning webs, you let him call himself whatever he li— WAAGH!
-Jumps up into the air, flipping around fast to throw a kick at Baron Von Baronstein's face-
edited 13th Jan '17 6:55:49 PM by SR3NORMANDY
What if there’s no better word than just not saying anything?Morshu's Shop
(Gwonam waits expectantly on that carpet, next to the unconscious gingerfucko
◊.)
The Villa Evil
(RIP Skaedra Bloodfucker.)
(DOOF! The Baron is kicked in the face and falls back, but hurriedly conjures up a massive, hairy tarantula monster, which leaps right for Spidey's fa—)
HAAAAAAAGHH—!
(KA-CHOP! Or not! Park manages to intercept it with Toshiro Il-Sung's pilfered katana and slices it in twain.)
(It flinches from the shots, but re-doubles its dragging efforts, screeching menacingly as its grip tightens on Orion's leg.)
edited 13th Jan '17 8:05:32 PM by MobileLeprechaun
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019Nice one, Park!
Now as for you—!!
-Spider-Man crosses his outstretched arms, firing two strands of web at alternating shoulders of the Baron, before yanking him towards him-
-Aiming to collide his chin right into Spidey's now-raised knee as he hops up off the ground-
edited 13th Jan '17 8:07:29 PM by SR3NORMANDY
What if there’s no better word than just not saying anything?Morshu's Shop
(...Hm! There's a very heavy-looking football made out of chiseled stone
◊, Planetman. Might could be formidable if thrown...!)
(Gabriella grabs herself a couple swords from the rack.)
I disdain to rush you in weapon acquisition, Planetman, but I think our time here is short.
HURRY. You must— CUM.
(Ol' Gwonam's gettin' fidgety...)
(Gunth has been having an uncontrollable giggling fit this whole time.)
The Villa Evil
(WHOP! Right in the kisser, and boy howdy is that Spider-Baron jarred. He staggers backward, nearly falling into a pile of his own spiders, and is clearly quite dazed.)
(KA-CHOP! The proboscis is severed neatly, and it writhes around like a gecko's tail, eventually losing its grip on Orion.)
SKREEEEEEEEEEE—!
(Beelzegrub is fuckin' pissed. With a sudden show of desperate strength, it telekinetically hefts the half-unconscious Breen into the air and shoots him right at Archer like a foppish old projectile!)
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019Aaaand now we turn it up a notch!
-Takes a running jump to slam both feet into the Baron's chest-
Bam!
What if there’s no better word than just not saying anything?

Our strength moves the mountains. Our blades split the water—!
(Archer summons another pair of Kanshou and Bakuya into his hand, throwing them both at Skaedra)
(as he does this the original pair flies at her from behind - now, all four steel-cutting blades are poised to cut her from four different directions at once)