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eldritchseer all the loose ends from Cocytus Since: Mar, 2019
Lilqueendaisy A chill feller from Not Earth Since: Jun, 2011 Relationship Status: In love with love
A chill feller
#120827: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:35:10 PM

-pawnch to the face!-

LOVE IS STORED IN THE AXOLOTL!
eldritchseer all the loose ends from Cocytus Since: Mar, 2019
all the loose ends
#120828: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:36:33 PM

X_X

-DEAD-

Rivux same old me from [a jump to the sky turns to a rider kick] Since: Aug, 2010
same old me
#120829: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:38:26 PM

Do punching bags go to punching bag heaven/hell when they die?

mario is red, i am green, i try my best, but everyone's mean
Lilqueendaisy A chill feller from Not Earth Since: Jun, 2011 Relationship Status: In love with love
A chill feller
#120830: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:38:44 PM

Maybe.

Maybe Seer is going to the later.

edited 9th Jun '13 9:39:39 PM by Lilqueendaisy

LOVE IS STORED IN THE AXOLOTL!
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#120831: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:42:41 PM

Yes. Yes he is.

I take it I'm doing well?

The game is deliberately vague about whatever Hojo did to Cloud and Zack apart from providing the basics, both to let your imagination fill in the blanks, and to keep their T rating. However, given all the depraved stuff we get to see him do onscreen, which is bad enough, it's probably better that way.

The guy:

  • Runs off with Lucrecia (who is also a completely insane bitch).
  • Experiments on their unborn child. Said unborn child was conceived only for this purpose, and later became Sephiroth (insanity runs in the family, so it was inevitable).
  • Fucks Lucrecia's shit up.
  • Shoots Vincent in cold blood when he tries to get Lucrecia to back out on the project.
  • Experiments on Vincent and then locks him in a coffin for thirty years.
  • Shoots Gast in cold blood after he tries to bail out on the Jenova Project for Ifalna's and Aeris's sake.
  • Experiments on a six month-old Aeris up until she was four years old and was able to escape.
  • Experiments Ifalna to death.
  • Is implied to have been the one that messed up the reactor to lure Sephiroth to Nibelheim where he would find out the truth.
  • All that good stuff with Cloud and Zack, which involved lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of brainpresents.
  • Kidnaps Nanaki and experiments on him.
  • Tries to breed Aeris with Nanaki to have more Cetra to make Cetra babies that will last a long time and won't die as easily.
  • Wears a speedo on a beach.
  • Lies to Cloud for shiggles.
  • Tells Cloud the truth for more shiggles, then refuses to give him a number when he hits rock bottom and is desperate enough for anything at all to call his own identity.
  • Is totally fine with the fact that his magnum opus is going to destroy humanity, sees it as the succession of a superior species replacing the old breed, and resolves to help him along by trying to destroy Midgar in order to kill himself and enough people to provide enough of a boost to the Lifestream for Sephiroth to consume.

That took a while to type. Fingers, meng.

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
thespacephantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#120832: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:44:44 PM

So... he's primarily responsible for most of the Bad Things that happen in the game.

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
Randomman5 "The Perfect Villain Doesn't Exi-" Since: Oct, 2011 Relationship Status: Forming Voltron
"The Perfect Villain Doesn't Exi-"
#120833: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:45:24 PM

I think he got his degree in a box of Cheerios...

Lilqueendaisy A chill feller from Not Earth Since: Jun, 2011 Relationship Status: In love with love
A chill feller
#120834: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:50:47 PM

Yeah...

LOVE IS STORED IN THE AXOLOTL!
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#120835: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:53:40 PM

Nearly all of them, yes.

There are fan theories that he raped Lucrecia as well. I doubt this, though — not because it would be beneath him (pun not intended), but because she was totally on board with all that crap, so she was probably fine with having sex with him so they could make a baby they could inject alien viruses and mako and chemicals into.

The President let him get away with pretty much everything, too, because his research on the Cetra (and Jenova, by extension... kinda, anyway) would eventually lead to the Promised Land, which means lots of money for President Shinra. If Hojo asks for something, he's guaranteed to get it.

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
Lilqueendaisy A chill feller from Not Earth Since: Jun, 2011 Relationship Status: In love with love
A chill feller
#120836: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:55:31 PM

... So the president gave him the degree from a cereal box?

edited 9th Jun '13 9:55:46 PM by Lilqueendaisy

LOVE IS STORED IN THE AXOLOTL!
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#120837: Jun 9th 2013 at 9:59:33 PM

Cereal boxes aren't that depraved. He got it from the internet. Clearly.

Most likely /b/.

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
pyr0h1tman8 What'd you just say about my hair?! from The Land Down Under Since: Jul, 2010
What'd you just say about my hair?!
#120838: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:00:52 PM

-Rimshot.-

In our heart, Mr. Ando will always be a penguin.
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#120839: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:05:44 PM

Thank you, thank you! I'll be here all night!

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
pyr0h1tman8 What'd you just say about my hair?! from The Land Down Under Since: Jul, 2010
What'd you just say about my hair?!
#120840: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:11:47 PM

Your good day sounds good by the way Spaz.

Reading over the FG a bit, I realised something about Hojo.

He's very extreme chaos in his social Darwinism and desire to cleanse weakness.

In our heart, Mr. Ando will always be a penguin.
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#120841: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:16:07 PM

He is indeed.

I love doing his speeches. So much fun.

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
SR3NORMANDY Problem Child from N/A - In constant flux Since: Jul, 2012
Problem Child
#120842: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:16:57 PM

Yep, Coras isn't coming out of this one with an intact psyche.

What if there’s no better word than just not saying anything?
pyr0h1tman8 What'd you just say about my hair?! from The Land Down Under Since: Jul, 2010
What'd you just say about my hair?!
#120843: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:17:15 PM

They certainly look like it.

In our heart, Mr. Ando will always be a penguin.
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#120844: Jun 9th 2013 at 10:21:19 PM

Enough speeches and surgery, though. Now we finally get to the mindgames! Yaaaaaaay!

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
Randomman5 "The Perfect Villain Doesn't Exi-" Since: Oct, 2011 Relationship Status: Forming Voltron
"The Perfect Villain Doesn't Exi-"
#120845: Jun 10th 2013 at 5:31:56 AM

Goku has no fucks to give for Hojo's mind games.

Sixthhokage1 Since: Feb, 2013
#120846: Jun 10th 2013 at 5:56:04 AM

-reads what this guy's done-

Holy shit ._.

RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#120847: Jun 10th 2013 at 6:05:28 AM

Random.

Random?

RAAANDDOOOOOOOMMMMMM

I think he's asleep.

FG is dead. RIP

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
Randomman5 "The Perfect Villain Doesn't Exi-" Since: Oct, 2011 Relationship Status: Forming Voltron
"The Perfect Villain Doesn't Exi-"
#120848: Jun 10th 2013 at 6:06:14 AM

Awake.

RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#120849: Jun 10th 2013 at 6:06:55 AM

Ah.

Oh good.

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
FergardStratoavis A Fluff Ringer from Bellveins (Troper Knight) Relationship Status: A gay little love melody
A Fluff Ringer
#120850: Jun 10th 2013 at 6:30:29 AM

(lurk)

Hm hm. What to do?


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