I did address that. I don't think that people don't like me because I'm not being interacted with. That'd be if someone disliked my writing, which is separate from myself.
The important part of the dislike part is the part where I ridiculous, lazy, and vindictive.
When people say things to that effect when I'm trying to explain myself, it does not lead to anything good.
Popping on briefly before my exam.
As far as I know, only two people here have said such things about you, and that was because they completely misinterpreted you. I will try to level with them once they're on, because it's clear that there have been no reparations for that, and there need to be. The old maxim about not going to bed hating your brother comes to mind. Lack of communication and willingness to understand others is a big part of this, I think.
Just my two cents on a bit of what you said last night, and I don't want to take attention away from what you're saying up there. You can skip over it if you'd like, because it's mainly my opinion, and it's secondary to the above.
It's possible to try for involvement without outright forcing your way in. I've seen you do that successfully in the past, likely before the unwanted pursuits you mentioned, and it seemed to me like you were easily getting interaction in. I understand why you would be afraid to subject others to being pressured, and that's very compassionate of you.
However, I don't think I'm too trusting when I say that that most (if not everyone) here would let you know if you were forcing something or making anyone uncomfortable. If I want in something, and I'm not sure if it's okay, I try to get in and just say in spoiler text something like "Let me know if this isn't okay".
You don't have to feel like merely edging in on something will make someone quietly upset with you, because it won't, not anymore than anyone's upset with me for shooping into last night's fun. If they have any objections, I think they'll let you know.
Likewise, if someone's pressuring you into something you'd rather not do, there's nothing mean about saying "Sorry, but I'd rather not". I'm habitually afraid about coming off as bitchy or petty or whatever if I vocally object, but really, sometimes you just don't want to or can't, and that's perfectly okay.
You're a human with needs, and you shouldn't feel guilty about trying to have your needs met, not in the slightest.
If anything I said was out of place, let me know. I want to get this sorted out for real, and I don't want there to be further animosity or hostility fed from misunderstandings.
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019

grate