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TheSpacePhantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#298151: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:13:29 AM

you fool

i will have the power

to create a new character

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
MobileLeprechaun (: from Grayrock, TX Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
(:
#298152: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:13:59 AM

'Ey Space.

make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019
Azure Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Fist from The World Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: We finish each other's sandwiches
Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Fist
#298153: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:14:53 AM

I would buy Divinity.

But I have no money.

PM box is Closed, Indefinitely Friend Code: 3368-4181-6850
MacDuffy from Enies Lobby Since: Jun, 2011 Relationship Status: Drift compatible
#298154: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:15:32 AM

how many classes do you have available

TheSpacePhantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#298155: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:16:11 AM

i am throwing my wallet at my phone right now

@duff: all of them

edited 2nd Aug '14 10:16:40 AM by TheSpacePhantom

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
Boxen whatever he can Since: Jan, 2013
whatever he can
#298156: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:18:23 AM

your whole wallet

dead devotion
TheSpacePhantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#298157: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:19:19 AM

that is what the phrase implies

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
MacDuffy from Enies Lobby Since: Jun, 2011 Relationship Status: Drift compatible
#298158: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:26:13 AM

all of them up to level 20

how long will that hold your attention i wonder

doing the same quests time and again

edited 2nd Aug '14 10:26:47 AM by MacDuffy

TheSpacePhantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#298159: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:27:03 AM

longer than you would think, just to spite you

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
ChrissieMcNapkins bruhonetta from the traphouse Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Hoping Senpai notices me
bruhonetta
#298160: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:27:08 AM

i have all the money

and I have no idea what to buy with it

I want a jojo shirt

I live in a constant state of fear and misery.
TheSpacePhantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#298161: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:27:32 AM

me too

but where to get a jojo shirt

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
ChrissieMcNapkins bruhonetta from the traphouse Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Hoping Senpai notices me
bruhonetta
#298162: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:30:27 AM

hmmmm

I live in a constant state of fear and misery.
Rivux same old me from [a jump to the sky turns to a rider kick] Since: Aug, 2010
same old me
#298163: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:31:25 AM

amazon?

mario is red, i am green, i try my best, but everyone's mean
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#298164: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:31:42 AM

I am still here.

I got distracted by wiggling my fingers and watching the bones under my skin move and realising "whooooaaaa I have a skeleton!" which is kind of a shitty thing to get distracted by, and for that I apologise.

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
foxmccloud4387 Since: Mar, 2011
#298165: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:31:45 AM

Do you think that I need to describe things and events more vividly in the FG? I think that's a shortcoming of mine.

TheSpacePhantom Jamais vu from the smallest church in Saint-Saëns Since: Oct, 2009
Jamais vu
#298166: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:32:49 AM

there is a skeleton inside you all right now

sweet dreams

@fox: i'm not sure. what do you mean?

UN JOUR JE SERAI DE RETOUR PRÈS DE TOI
MobileLeprechaun (: from Grayrock, TX Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
(:
#298167: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:34:20 AM

@Spaz: Have you ever really looked at your hand, maaaaaaan?

@Fox: I don't think you're necessarily being too brusque, but being more descriptive is something that I would recommend to anyone and everyone, no matter their skill level.

make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019
chibifenrix Forever wandering, Never lost. from Va-1 Ha-1A Since: Dec, 2012 Relationship Status: Barbecuing
foxmccloud4387 Since: Mar, 2011
#298169: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:36:49 AM

I remember during one fight scene I had Archer pull all the combatants into that pocket dimension of his. Within FSN, he does so by deploying this heatless ring of fire, which pulls in everyone who touches it.

I just think that it would've been cooler if I had described it like that. Instead I was just like "ohp, everyone's in this pocket dimension now", so in hindsight I found the scene I wrote a little underwhelming. Maybe I'm just worrying too much.

[up]Morning, Chibi. Morning, Yukari.

edited 2nd Aug '14 10:37:29 AM by foxmccloud4387

GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#298170: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:37:02 AM

This is just general advice, since I haven't seen much of Archer, but as far as descriptions go, it's really not a huge concern as long as you're putting in enough detail so others can figure out what's going on. If you're gonna focus on anything, though, focus on making sure your dialogue doesn't get too stiff. There's a fine line between a tense moment and a cheesy melodramatic one, and people trying to make characters sound sympathetic can easily make them sound smug by trying to have them drop "chestnuts of wisdom" that are a bit too forced. The second one happened a lot, especially with Ace.

@Chibi: What happen?

edited 2nd Aug '14 10:37:53 AM by GameSpazzer

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
MobileLeprechaun (: from Grayrock, TX Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
(:
#298171: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:38:49 AM

@Chibi: Ooh Lord. Is this offsite?

@Fox: That's not necessarily a super bad thing, as it's generally easier to get a quick description out, but if you feel you need to add a little more, go right ahead and do so. It helps.

make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019
MobileLeprechaun (: from Grayrock, TX Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
(:
#298172: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:44:18 AM

Doublepost, but goddamnit, Near.

make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019
ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#298173: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:45:16 AM

Showen emotion.

MobileLeprechaun (: from Grayrock, TX Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
(:
#298174: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:47:16 AM

How did that typo escape me?

That whole lusus thing is just NOPE. Near has not been shown to really give a shit in canon, and if he does, he represses the hell out of it.

make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019
GameSpazzer The Beta Male from Against! The! Wall! Since: Jun, 2010
The Beta Male
#298175: Aug 2nd 2014 at 10:50:08 AM

What's an ishidden?

Also

and people trying to make characters sound sympathetic can easily make them sound smug by trying to have them drop "chestnuts of wisdom" that are a bit too forced.

Can we save this somehow? Because this is a super important thing that I think trips a lot of newbies up (newbies that have long since left, but still). Being from a shonen anime does not necessitate that you must talk like one, and unlike the anime you don't have a team of writers to come up with things for you to say, so you mostly just wind up coming off as a condescending tool.

MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist

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