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There's a "me" in team.
Steve Jobs arrives at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter says to him, "Steve, you present a very unusual situation. You're greatly responsible for the advance of computers and technology, and you've improved many peoples' lives. On the other hand, you were also a cruel, arrogant jerk, and some peoples' devotion to you infringes on the First Commandment. Therefore, we're going to give you a choice of going to Heaven or Hell."
Jobs immediately replies "Heaven."
Peter says "It's not that simple, you have to spend a day in Heaven and a day in Hell before making your final choice."
Jobs says, "I've already made ym choice. I want to go to Heaven, and that's that."
Peter shrugs and says, "Well, if that's the case...", then opens the gates and lets Jobs in.
A blond a brunette and a redhead walked into a bar. They sat down, had a few drinks, and went home shortly before closing time. None of them seemed any less intelligent than the others.
I'll take a chip and eat it.
Because, you know, that's what you do with chips.
This! Is! ATHENS!
I'll have a glass of milk... shaken, not stirred.
So, a duck walks in to a bar and asks the bartender "Do you have any grapes?" The bartender says "Sure, here you go."
MARK IT EIGHT!!!
Dear Pesky Plumbers,
The Koopalings and I have taken a trip over to the Mushroom Kingdom! The Princess has invited us to be honored guests at your guys' picnic! I dare ya to try some of my four-alarm atomic-bomb chili...if ya can!
-Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
-I'm really sorry for this mistake. Let me bring you a new one, this time with no flies.
Hello, I'm with this generic delivery company and I have a package for you. Sign here please.
No worries. Have a great day.
Thanks, you too!
Did you just summon a bunch of monsters in one turn?
That's against the rules, isn't it?
Oh, my apologies. Allow me to remove that card from play.
edited 30th Oct '11 7:12:02 PM by VmKid
Chuck Norris once went to work and had a productive day.
YOU DARE BRING LIGHT TO MY LAIR?!
Put that damn thing out already! It's like a freakin miniature sun! What's wrong with you?
"Gee, it sure is boring around here..."
"Oh for crying out loud, Link! Go find something to do if you're THAT bored..."
edited 31st Oct '11 9:57:37 AM by EarlOfSandvich
This thread is no 20% more subverted.
Princess Celestia is a kind, good-natured princess and nothing more.
Each time you call Gabe Newell fat, he'll acknowledge that and return to whatever he was doing at the moment.
edited 31st Oct '11 10:17:54 AM by EarlOfSandvich
But wait there's more. If you order now, I'll throw in another absolutely free! All this can be yours for the low price of $19.94!
Resistance is possible.
This situation is bad, but I know it could be worse.
I have a good feeling about this...
edited 31st Oct '11 11:47:12 AM by Premonition45
The ugly witch is here to us.
more like every lucus franchise
In Soviet Russia, I subvert a meme.
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