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Abuse is Okay When It's Female on Male?Why?

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KSonik Since: Jan, 2015
#1: May 3rd 2011 at 2:57:06 AM

Can anyone explain to me why this hypocritical, (not to mention pretty cruel to the victim), trope actually happens?

Deboss I see the Awesomeness. from Awesomeville Texas Since: Aug, 2009
I see the Awesomeness.
#2: May 3rd 2011 at 3:21:18 AM

IRL or in media?

Fight smart, not fair.
Deathonabun Bunny from the bedroom Since: Jan, 2001
Bunny
#3: May 3rd 2011 at 4:13:17 AM

Because obviously women are super weak and always need to be protected, and men are obviously always stronger!

It is simply preposterous to think that a man could be weak enough to be pushed around by a woman like that, of course!

...Or something of that nature.

Yes, it's very, very stupid. I know.

edited 3rd May '11 4:13:50 AM by Deathonabun

One of my few regrets about being born female is the inability to grow a handlebar mustache. -Landstander
BrayPhantom from Cloudsdale Since: Jul, 2010
#5: May 9th 2011 at 12:52:51 PM

Well, in RL at least, I have a guy friend who says that the guy ALWAYS deserves it (even if he doesn't) and that he should be man enough to take it. He said this in all seriousness, and actually believes this. I think it is both the idea that men are stronger, and that somehow they deserve it.

neoYTPism Since: May, 2010
#6: May 9th 2011 at 6:08:14 PM

[up] A guy saying that? I hope he gets abused.

As for the thread itself, I think this would be better for on-topic discussions if you're talking about the real-life implications of the trope, but two main reasons have been pointed out:

  • Assuming the guy deserves whatever the girl gives him, and...
  • Assuming that a strong man would not let a woman push him around.

At least the former, even if it's an assumption that I don't consider reasonable, is something that Abuse Is Okay When It Is Female on Male follows from if assumed.

The latter, however, fails to take into account that fighting back could likely result in him being falsely accused, partly BECAUSE of this mentality, of having started it in the first place. So it ends up being pretty circular.

That and such stereotyping closely resembles the reasoning behind discrimination against women in the military, yet that is much more commonly protested against than the Abuse Is Okay When It Is Female on Male attitude. The only way left to reconcile it is to assume that women are just as tough and strong as men, but also morally superior.

RavenWilder Since: Apr, 2009
#7: May 11th 2011 at 6:22:13 AM

Stereotypical domestic abuse is male against female, and comedic situations often rely upon a reversal of expectations. That's why.

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