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Tangent128 from Virginia Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
#8301: Oct 23rd 2012 at 8:36:57 PM

Good luck with that, Eskay.

Can you, at your next opportunity, provide a short list of your highest-priority characters to do something with, and hints for what type of thing to have them do?

Do you highlight everything looking for secret messages?
Umbramatic Meet The New Boss from WAAPT usually, sometimes WHABP or maybe PEFE Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: Gay for Big Boss
Meet The New Boss
#8302: Oct 23rd 2012 at 8:51:48 PM

Sixth: Please, for the love of God, stop bullshitting yourself and us about how horrible you are. It's the only thing I DO hate about you.

Speaking of bullshit, that's pretty much what I think parental paranoia over "internet addiction" is. Partially because of all the implications the word "addiction" has, and partially because my parents have misused that to be total dicks to me.

So, Eskay, while this whole situation makes me instinctively want to vomit for multiple reasons, I pity you, and will respect your wishes by keeping your chars alive as much as I can. Not sure if I can advance any subplots, though.

Contact Me!
crowlover from a Jolly Caucus Race Since: Jan, 2012 Relationship Status: Don't hug me; I'm scared
#8303: Oct 23rd 2012 at 8:54:28 PM

@Eskay I hope you get everything straightened out.

I've been kind of procrastinating on school-related things as well because of time I've spent with the RP. My grades are still at a level I'm okay with, but I need to start self-policing more, so I don't end up having to take a break. Hopefully this will help reinforce the need for that.

"Don't worry, murder is a sign of affection." - An amalgamation of Dunsparce
Sixthhokage1 Since: Feb, 2013
#8304: Oct 23rd 2012 at 9:01:14 PM

My situation with school is quite known here, and I've been disobeying my parents for a great majority of the time that I've been here. Eskay is actually trying to fix things, more than I can honestly say about myself.

Umbramatic Meet The New Boss from WAAPT usually, sometimes WHABP or maybe PEFE Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: Gay for Big Boss
Meet The New Boss
#8305: Oct 23rd 2012 at 9:07:52 PM

OK, the school situation is an issue, but it doesn't make you a horrible person. And honestly, parents can be complete freaking tools much of the time.

Ugh, I ought to go to bed before I get worse...

Contact Me!
Sixthhokage1 Since: Feb, 2013
#8306: Oct 23rd 2012 at 9:18:10 PM

I'm not saying that it makes me a horrible person, though it is related to why I have said that I am. But this is not the place for me to vent about my insecurities, anxiety, and such matters, so I will just shut up now.

I hope you can get past this, Eskay. I'll be praying for you.

DarkerShining (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#8307: Oct 24th 2012 at 2:57:43 AM

... Okay, all this talk about illness and mental issues is so not making my own paranoia about my physical and mental health any better. I suppose that's not your fault, though. I would get unwell just from reading about bloodstreams, and organs, and how the body works back when I was in middle school.

Maybe I should just quit making excuses, and just admit I don't want to be a part of the RP already... Except, I wouldn't be entirely truthful if I did that. I do want to be part of it, it's just that... Well, I don't really enjoy any of it.

I don't like any of the characters, not even my own. They're all either too predictable, or their Character Development happens too fast, or it doesn't happen despite the fact that something has occured many enough times for it to make people wonder why they haven't learned anything by now, or they're just plain unlikeable or flat.

Not to mention we keep saying we will do stuff, but we keep not doing them. Like, remember how we said we would cut down on the appearances of legendaries? Yeah, I'm still noticing that legendaries still are appearing on-screen.

And I still barely have anyone to interact with. How are my characters supposed to grow and build relationships with others if there are no one else to talk to? And before you say "You could just ask us", a lot of people are busy with RL or doing other things in-RP, and if you know me well, you should know by now that I'm just too darn nice to try to bring it up as I just feel like I'm just coming off as craving attention.

I've still been feeling pretty apathetic lately... And I feel pretty bad about not telling my mother about the issues I've been having here, despite knowing I can speak to her about anything. Like other things I try to keep private, I'll probably end up blurting it out to her eventually to prove a point, such as the fact that I do have other interesses other than Pokemon, or that I 'do'' want to change myself, because I'm just so unsatisfied with my current life.

Even though I've been cutting down on my laptop use (although not as much as I probably should...), I... I don't really have anywhere else to go. There's no where else I really belong. It may be that I've been addicted to the internet for the last nine years, or so... But, the more I think about it, it might just be because... well, I don't have anywhere else to go. My life's pathetic, really, but hey, at least I'm starting to get closer to my dream of being a professional writer, that's something...

I... I don't even know where I'm going with this. Like other times I've been considering quitting the RP, I'll probably end up not going through with it because then you guys would be sad, and all that... I'm too nice for my own good.

strawberryflavored Since: Sep, 2010
#8308: Oct 24th 2012 at 3:01:35 AM

-hugs DS-

I'm sorry for any part that I may have caused in that...

Eskay64 Since: Nov, 2010
#8309: Oct 24th 2012 at 4:21:29 AM

Okay, this is the one opportunity I will use.

Tangent: All I have that are high-priority are Eskay, Alli, and Diane; I have no specific wishes for them, just keeping them somewhat active.

Umbra: The word "addiction" was my own choice. My dad had no influence on that post whatsoever.

DS: I'm... honestly not sure what to say...

And now, goodbye again.

Umbramatic Meet The New Boss from WAAPT usually, sometimes WHABP or maybe PEFE Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: Gay for Big Boss
Meet The New Boss
#8310: Oct 24th 2012 at 5:10:04 AM

Eskay

Still. The term "internet addiction" reads of paranoia and over-the-top "solutions," so it still makes me sick. Sorry.

DS

Normally, I would be sympathetic. However, there are some things you said there that honestly really piss me off.

One, the thing about Legendaries. We said we would cut down, not eliminate their existence completely. It's pretty much entirely unreasonable for them to not appear onscreen at all, especially since some are great characters in their own right.

Oh wait.

You also just said you hate ALL the characters. And that disgusts me.

It's one thing to be critical of your characters, or even a few other people's characters. Insulting every character in this RP is quite frankly one of the most insulting, downright horrible things you could do.

People have spent so much time developing and refining their characters as much as they can, and you dismissing that entirely is just... mind-numbing.

I... honestly expected better of you, DS. And it's taking every ounce of restraint I have to not utterly savage you right now.

Well, I'll allow myself one thing. Maybe if you bothered interacting with everyone else on a regular basis instead of sticking with Wolf 90% of the time, maybe you would appreciate everyone else's effort more.

Ugh, I'm honestly considering leaving myself. Apparently no one likes anyone around here.

edited 24th Oct '12 5:14:17 AM by Umbramatic

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DarkerShining (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#8311: Oct 24th 2012 at 5:53:08 AM

Yeah, you're right... I don't deserve to be part of this RP anymore. Too many characters and plots to keep track of, and being unable to feel anything for any of them... Yeah... It's better if I leave. I wouldn't want to ask any of you to change just to meet my standards and stuff... For those who tried to help, I'm sorry I wasted your time.

I might still need help with my writing, though, but... I can't show my face around you guys anymore.

Thanks for being my friends for so long, and for all you guys did for me to help me improve my writing. I really did appreciate our friendship, and I'm sorry things didn't work out.

BadWolf21 Since: May, 2010
#8312: Oct 24th 2012 at 5:55:51 AM

-hugs DS tightly- I think we all just need to take a deep breath, okay? This has been a bad week, but we can get through it.

crowlover from a Jolly Caucus Race Since: Jan, 2012 Relationship Status: Don't hug me; I'm scared
#8313: Oct 24th 2012 at 6:19:23 AM

Don't know if this will help or hurt, but...

DS: At this point, I'd recommend that if you don't plan on outright quitting, to take a break from the RP. If you do end up quitting, though, I'd prefer you remain in contact. I know I don't talk with you much, but I know you would be missed if you left.

And don't know if this'll help either, but I don't dislike any of you.

"Don't worry, murder is a sign of affection." - An amalgamation of Dunsparce
Eskay64 Since: Nov, 2010
#8314: Oct 24th 2012 at 6:27:30 AM

...Urgh, I shouldn't have said anything. It only led to even more drama.

Look, DS. You need a break. Not completely leaving, just a break. You just need to stop for a bit and breathe. We all say and do stuff we eventually regret afterwards when we're under stress or in a bad mood. Don't make this permanent. Just give yourself a bit of time to clear your head.

I do not want to come back to this learning that it collapsed while I was gone. I promised I would return, and I would very much like to keep my promise.

But at the rate it's going, it seems like I won't get to.

As for "addiction"... I'm making sure this solution is not over-the-top. Please don't read it that way.

edited 24th Oct '12 6:28:03 AM by Eskay64

memyselfandI2 Dunsparce Cloud from The Biosphere Since: Nov, 2010 Relationship Status: Hooked on a feeling
Dunsparce Cloud
#8315: Oct 24th 2012 at 6:33:09 AM

-hugs everyone-

Agreed with Wolf and Crow. I do not hate anyone here at all. There are people I've disagreed with, but most of my issues with people are professional, not personal.

Also, what Wolf said. Emotions have been running rather high this week, and it doesn't seem like it's proving a good time for anyone.

Please calm down, everyone. Anger and accusation do not help here. We are a community, and we need to stick together.

Dunsparce didn't stop being a thing or anything.
Anomalocaris20 from Sagittarius A* Since: Sep, 2010 Relationship Status: Love blinded me (with science!)
#8316: Oct 24th 2012 at 6:35:12 AM

...Normally, I don't like to post here. I'm gone, after all. And I certainly don't like to post anything defensive like this, but for me not to would be abandoning DS. Umbra, there's such a thing as tact. Please learn it. You see DS is clearly quite upset, and while you're angry at what she said, that's not an excuse to begin saying things like that she disgusts you, or that it's unbearably horrible, or that it's taking every ounce of willpower not to savage her. I mean, seriously? I'm socially inept, yes, but even I recognize that's a rotten thing to do angry or not.

edited 24th Oct '12 6:43:29 AM by Anomalocaris20

You cannot firmly grasp the true form of Squidward's technique!
Umbramatic Meet The New Boss from WAAPT usually, sometimes WHABP or maybe PEFE Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: Gay for Big Boss
Meet The New Boss
#8317: Oct 24th 2012 at 7:19:13 AM

...Sorry about that, Anom. You're right, I was being a dick up there, and I apologize. To DS and to everyone else.

It just hit me in a sensitive spot, and I'm already stressed. Still, no excuse. I'm sorry.

DS, please don't leave. We'd all miss you so much...

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Mezzopiano You're shivering. Are you afraid? from That Cold Place Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Crazy Cat Lady
You're shivering. Are you afraid?
#8318: Oct 24th 2012 at 7:20:40 AM

DS: Don't feel like you have to keep up with the RP if it doesn't interest you. Taking a break is fine if you need it, but like others have said, if you do end up leaving completely I'd like to stay in touch.

Umbra: ...Seriously? Here DS is, being upset with everything, and you decide to yell at her for it? Since when is it required that everyone likes the characters in this RP?

Do not fear power... fear those who wield it.
OnionShew Where's my lantern? from London Below Since: Jun, 2012
Where's my lantern?
#8319: Oct 24th 2012 at 7:31:29 AM

DS: -hugs- I hope you don't leave because I love your writing and characters, but if you do, then yes, you don't have any obligation to keep up if you don't want to.

And adressing the other concern at the moment, it'd be much better for all of us if we probably just dropped it. Character is who we are under pressure. The community can manage.

Ab luce in tenebras et e tenebris venit lux; altera sine altera esse nequit, deinde nihil nisi concavum sit.
Eskay64 Since: Nov, 2010
#8320: Oct 24th 2012 at 8:15:32 AM

There we go. Now I'm actually looking forward to my return.

On that note... it's time I finally follow through with what I said.

See you all in a month or so.

edited 24th Oct '12 8:19:19 AM by Eskay64

FullMoon feeling blue from Surface Since: Jul, 2012 Relationship Status: Shipping fictional characters
feeling blue
#8321: Oct 24th 2012 at 8:18:17 AM

A lot happened while I slept and studied huh...

Well, there isn't much that I can say that wasn't said already, that and I'm rather new to the forum. So really, I don't have anything to say about all this. I'm rather bad with this kind of problem, I just hope things work out for you two, DS and Eskay.

DarkerShining (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#8322: Oct 24th 2012 at 8:23:50 AM

Bye for now, Eskay.

As for me... I... I don't know what to do here. I know I should know better than to make decisions based on mood swings, but... I don't know if I'll stay in the RP or not... And if I just take a break, I'd probably miss out on the rest of Kanjoh and a lot of things I had wanted to do...

edited 24th Oct '12 8:24:00 AM by DarkerShining

BadWolf21 Since: May, 2010
#8323: Oct 24th 2012 at 8:34:43 AM

DS: If it lets you do what you want in Kanjoh, I will run an entire community of brand new NPCs so you can do exactly what you want when you return. You are such an important part of this RP, and you have no idea how much you would be missed if you left.

DarkerShining (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#8324: Oct 24th 2012 at 8:42:41 AM

Wouldn't be quite the same, though... There are some interactions between characters in the main cast that would be too good to pass up.

BadWolf21 Since: May, 2010
#8325: Oct 24th 2012 at 8:45:35 AM

You can always employ Time Shenanigans to catch up on what you missed. I'm sure there isn't anyone here who wouldn't go back in time to interact with you.


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