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Psychobabble6 from the spark of Westeros
Feb 12th 2013 at 8:29:28 AM

Dunno if this was posted before - sorry if it was...





In Idiocracy, one of the characters is watching a porn channel on TV (called Sweet Bang Tube), and the video is of a woman using her feet to cut up a steak dinner. It's less disturbing than it sounds; although in keeping with the movie itself, it just goes to show the declining standards that even porn has in the future.
  • Porn has standards?

edited 12th Feb '13 8:31:15 AM by Psychobabble6

And if I claim to be a wise man, well, it surely means that I don't know.
Kerrah Pure cuteness from Helsinki, Finland
Pure cuteness
Feb 12th 2013 at 8:57:01 AM

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WMG/Batman

Search the page for "Bruce Wayne is the Batman".

There's this humongous in-universe discussion about the merit of that theory.

Knowing is growing.
dontcallmewave Brony? Moi? surely you jest! from My home
Brony? Moi? surely you jest!
Feb 12th 2013 at 9:48:52 AM

the page image for Empty Room Psych

He who fights bronies should see to itthat he himself does not become a brony. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, Pinkie Pie gazes Also
Madrugada Zzzzzzzzzz Relationship Status: In season
Zzzzzzzzzz
Feb 12th 2013 at 5:18:48 PM

The final line of the definition section of Consequence Combo:

Essentially, while some people inspire loyalty by offering a carrot, and some people inspire fear by threatening a stick, this person just hits you over the head with the carrot.

...if you don’t love you’re dead, and if you do, they’ll kill you for it.
Feb 13th 2013 at 7:12:10 AM

Zero-Effort Boss: "Roman Emperor Claudius once fought a whale as a gladiator, with both combatants stuck on land (descriptions of the event indicate the whale was not intentionally put there)."

dRoy Perpetually clueless from The Happy Place Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
Perpetually clueless
Feb 13th 2013 at 7:58:59 AM

[up] What in the bizzare world? [lol][tup]

This quote in the Real Life section of Jumped at the Call:

...applying to enter the special forces isn't so much jumping at the call as it is running at the call with a knife while the call is deep in enemy territory and holed up in a secret complex filled with fanatical armed guards after you've been without rest, water, or food for three days in the desert and you don't have even half of what would normally be needed to get at the call.

Mother of god...You turned one of the hardest and best Champions into an absolute joke. - Zelenal
UmLovely The Darkness Grows from 2814 Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
The Darkness Grows
Feb 13th 2013 at 4:00:06 PM

Also from the WMG/Batman page:

Alfred is a Flash. How else could he find the time to do everything from take care of a 50-room mansion to run the high-tech Batcave without anyone's help?

Because he's the Goddamned Butler to the Goddamned Batman. That's how.

When no one was looking Afred cleaned 50 rooms. That's as many as 5 tens. And that's awesome

edited 13th Feb '13 4:00:29 PM by UmLovely

RISE
Parable State of Mind from California Relationship Status: Star-crossed
State of Mind
Feb 13th 2013 at 8:49:25 PM

From Pokemon Headscrathers:

Why has no one pointed out all of the terrible things Ash and others have done to Team Rocket?
  • We have. It's right there in the article. As for the show… nobody in the cast likes JJ&M enough to care.
  • It's pretty simple. If you don't want to be electrocuted, don't stalk 10 year olds. You honestly think they don't bring it on themselves?
  • Side note: Best Space Whale Aesop ever right there.

And it's a long way forward, so trust in me. I'll give them shelter, like you've done for me
MissMokushiroku Ace Gamer from Atlanta, Georgia, USA Relationship Status: Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free
Ace Gamer
Feb 13th 2013 at 9:05:22 PM

RecycledInSpace.OtherMedia:

  • Many universities have three semesters of calculus, where Calculus III is Calculus I and II IN 3D SPACE!
  • After learning about vectors on a plane comes vectors IN SPACE!
  • Similarly, multi-variable calculus is calculus IN 3D SPACE!

edited 13th Feb '13 9:05:36 PM by MissMokushiroku

0dd1 Just awesome like that from Nowhere Land
Just awesome like that
Feb 13th 2013 at 10:55:51 PM

[up]I love how much more exciting it sounds when you put it that way [lol]

Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle. My music.
wuggles http://wugthepug.tumblr.com/ from Miami, FL Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
Feb 17th 2013 at 3:06:14 PM

The farmer who owned the infamous Mike the Headless Chicken reported female chickens continued to be attracted to him, which is partially understandable, given that he was now 4 times heavier than most of the chickens there, as well as the oldest. The art for his merchandize as well also depicts him as a headless stud. Mike, however, being blind, had no idea how desirable he was.

From the Freakiness Shame page.

MikeK 3 microphones forever from planet earth Relationship Status: watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
3 microphones forever
Feb 17th 2013 at 8:34:15 PM

Somehow I ended up on the page for Flesh for Frankenstein, which I've never seen, and noted the last sentence: "Before long, everything goes nuts and most people die." Just think of how many movies/shows/real life historical events/etc that could also apply to.

edited 17th Feb '13 8:35:09 PM by MikeK

GREETINGS FELLOW HUMANS.
Feb 17th 2013 at 10:58:27 PM

The fact that someone got into a super detailed analysis of a song on Slut-Shaming. Wouldn't be too bad or funny. If the song being analyzed weren't Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jebson.

Me thinks someone is reading too much into it.

0dd1 Just awesome like that from Nowhere Land
Just awesome like that
Feb 17th 2013 at 11:09:19 PM

The Carly Rae Jepsen video, Call Me Maybe is a painful example of the contortions a woman has to go through to express sexuality without being called a slut. She sees a beautiful man, and is physically pushed by her friends into trying to attract his interest, because she obviously can't just go up to him. Then, ostensibly having attracted his attention through her zany sitcom shenanigans, she hands him her number, making it a point to say she's not a slut and never does this ("I just met you / and this is crazy"), before handing him her number and pointedly ceding all future authority and activity to him ("so call me maybe"). Then she reiterates that she's not a slut ("and all the other boys / try to chase me"). All so she can hit on the boy next door. One to ten she still gets called a slut.
I didn't even go into this much detail in my in-depth explanation of why 'You Belong With Me' is about a stalker.

Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle. My music.
0dd1 Just awesome like that from Nowhere Land
Just awesome like that
Feb 18th 2013 at 12:03:23 AM

Oh God, the page for My Immortal. It's gotten even funnier since the last time I read it.

  • Anti-Climax: Chapter 17-18. 17 sets up some fight between "Dumblydore" and Voldemort, but 18 opens with Ebony waking up. It's explained away in a paragraph, where Dumbledore "chased him off" (and then segues into Ebony and Draco having sex to a Linkin Park song...). Of course, most fights end with someone flying away. Rather like The Iliad, only stupid.

Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle. My music.
Feb 18th 2013 at 8:18:41 AM

Never Was This Universe:

  • At first, Watchmen may seem like a case of In Spite of a Nail or Alien Space Bats: the timeline appears to have diverged from ours in 1938 with the emergence of costumed heroes, and more drastically in 1959 with the birth of Dr. Manhattan, who has actual superpowers. However, a close look at the details of the comic hint that the timeline diverged a lot earlier than in 1938. In the world of Watchmen, the famous Heinz slogan is not "57 Varieties", like in our world, but "58 Varieties". Also, apparently The New York Times doesn't exist at all, it's been replaced by the fictional New York Gazette. In our world, both the coining of the "57 Varieties" slogan and the founding of The New York Times took place decades before 1938, so the implication is that there were subtle differences between our timeline and the Watchmen timeline long before the costumed heroes entered the scene. With "58 Varieties", it's theoretically possible that the new slogan simply replaced "57 Varieties" sometime after 1938, but New York Gazette already existed in 1938, as Hollis Mason's autobiography mentions the paper reporting the initial exploits of the first costumed hero, Hooded Justice. There are also other differences between our world and the world of Watchmen — such as the existence of a man with actual psychic powers — that seem to be unrelated to the costumed heroes or Dr. Manhattan, therefore suggesting that world of Watchmen was never ours to begin with.

0dd1 Just awesome like that from Nowhere Land
Just awesome like that
Feb 18th 2013 at 9:34:18 AM

[up][lol] Who ever said tropers overanalyze?

Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle. My music.
Noaqiyeum The it-thingy from the October Country Relationship Status: Showing feelings of an almost human nature
The it-thingy
Feb 18th 2013 at 12:43:24 PM

Mistakes? Alan Moore? Surely you jest.

Anyone who looks dangerous is dangerous. Anyone who doesn't look dangerous is dangerous and sneaky.
Wooboo Relationship Status: Less than three
Feb 18th 2013 at 3:17:31 PM

I was checking out the YMMV page for The Final Sacrifice (Zap Rowsdower!) and then came across this towards the very bottom.

This Is Your Premise on Drugs: It's like Indiana Jones, in Canada, on Valium. With a $29.50 budget.

Hang on, let me warm up Facebook and find something witty.
Psychobabble6 from the spark of Westeros
Feb 18th 2013 at 5:26:55 PM

[up]Now I have to see it.

And if I claim to be a wise man, well, it surely means that I don't know.
PurpleDalek from a planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse Relationship Status: Tongue-tied
Feb 20th 2013 at 5:17:48 AM

From No Real Life Examples Please.

Talking Poo: Cannot happen in real life.

I hate gardening! What sort of a person has a power complex about flowers? It’s dictatorship for inadequates.
dontcallmewave Brony? Moi? surely you jest! from My home
Brony? Moi? surely you jest!
Feb 20th 2013 at 7:41:21 AM

The one right above it, in a possibly unintentional way:

Taking Advantageof Generosity: Too easy to abuse.

He who fights bronies should see to itthat he himself does not become a brony. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, Pinkie Pie gazes Also
BearyScary from A Planet That Looks Like It Has Chameleons Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
Feb 22nd 2013 at 11:10:30 PM

The terrible pun that is the image caption for Boring, but Practical.

Demetrios Feeling relaxed again from Wheeling, Illinois Relationship Status: Wishing you were here
Feeling relaxed again
Feb 23rd 2013 at 8:34:24 AM

I like the witty comment about Sailor Venus's evil twin on The Psycho Rangers page. The one about Ishtar in addition to being a bad movie. [tup]

Princess Lily is cooler than Sister Lily
MokonaZero Hohoende, kudasai! from Boundary
Hohoende, kudasai!
Feb 23rd 2013 at 12:17:45 PM

"Fun game: try to post a YouTube comment so stupid that people realize you must be joking. (Hint: This is impossible.)" From the Troll page. evil grin

Everything is a lie.

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