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Things You are No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG

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Michael So that's what this does Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Drift compatible
So that's what this does
#551: Nov 5th 2011 at 10:18:19 AM

The description of Shadowrun above is completely wrong. Any task in Shadowrun consists of:

Plan (30 mins) Risk assessment (30 minutes) Shopping (30 minutes) Blow shit up (5 minutes)

Repeat.

Edit: Also, rockets cost an absolute fortune. Far cheaper to hire a gang member to act as a sapper. Give him some remote detonation bombs and a few hundred and he'll probably end up close enough to the target even if they blow his head off.

edited 5th Nov '11 10:20:14 AM by Michael

Krautman WHAT HAS SCIENCE WROUGHT from Hiding from the man, man Since: Jan, 2010
WHAT HAS SCIENCE WROUGHT
#552: Nov 5th 2011 at 9:44:08 PM

  • I am no longer allowed to take ranks in perform: wind.

Why? I did this as a distraction to an Archdemon while he was casting:

...and that's terrible.
Xiphoniii Cheeky son of a.... from Florida Since: Aug, 2009
Exelixi Lesbarian from Alchemist's workshop Since: Sep, 2011 Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
#554: Nov 6th 2011 at 6:18:51 AM

May have already posted this but, as of last week, my old DM has told the DM that I may be playing with soon that I am never, ever allowed anywhere near a Divine Class on the basis that I can and will turn the most innocent divine class (say, cleric) into the inquisition.

Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
darnpenguin Yakka Foob Mog from one friend to another Since: Jan, 2001
Yakka Foob Mog
#555: Nov 6th 2011 at 6:30:19 AM

It's funny you mention that, because I'm currently working on my character for the next round of D&D Encounters: a dwarf battle cleric named Inquisitor Grumpin.

Add me on Skype: Al Cook (darnpenguin)
Exelixi Lesbarian from Alchemist's workshop Since: Sep, 2011 Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
#556: Nov 6th 2011 at 6:35:56 AM

Nono, not an Inquisitor. The Inquisition. I think my record is three hundred and twelve NPC followers- the DM had to keep a special chart detailing how quickly my radical new ideas were spreading through the churches.

Hey, fight fire with fire; when there's an abundance of Asmodeus cults, it's time to train the faithful to kill them all.

edited 6th Nov '11 6:36:17 AM by Exelixi

Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
CountDorku Behold my legal acumen! from the depths of insanity (4 Score & 7 Years Ago) Relationship Status: Above such petty unnecessities
Behold my legal acumen!
#557: Nov 7th 2011 at 12:44:18 PM

When I reformat my caste, my new caste mark cannot be a smiley/trollface, the symbol for any Magic The Gathering set, a swear word in Old Realm, a D20, a fist with raised middle finger, or the cutie mark of any canonical pony.

Exelixi Lesbarian from Alchemist's workshop Since: Sep, 2011 Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
#558: Nov 7th 2011 at 3:45:11 PM

  • The party Munchkin's character's name is not "Minimus Maximus", especially if the game is set in a facsimile of the Holy Roman Empire.

EDIT: Spoke to potential-DM again today. He asked what precisely was so bad about me according to Dusty.

Naturally, I asked him about a few details of the world, broke out my dice and did a "test run". I thus accumulated a new ban from a new DM before even starting:

Not allowed to obliterate a major religion and send the world into chaos by shagging the Goddess of the Innocent.

EDIT EDIT: Damn, Welch beat me to it on the "Minimus Maximus" thing.

edited 7th Nov '11 6:17:47 PM by Exelixi

Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
Exelixi Lesbarian from Alchemist's workshop Since: Sep, 2011 Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
#559: Nov 7th 2011 at 6:57:16 PM

There is no such monster as a "Cockblockatrice", and I certainly can't summon one, even if the Paladin flirting with the party thief is both violating his character concept and being a total ass.

Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
CrazyLogic from USA Since: Sep, 2009
#560: Nov 8th 2011 at 12:03:07 PM

These are IC restrictions, although the first one is mixed with OOC.

My Inquisitional acolyte is not allowed to go off on her own again. She already has had her spine and rib cage replaced, she doesn't need any more metal parts.

She also can never sleep with her lover on a mission again. Everyone heard them and it was awkward.

If what I say doesn't make sense, please refer to my name. Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE! http://orkinet.lefora.com/
AckSed Pat. St. of Archive Binge from Pure Imagination Since: Jan, 2001
Pat. St. of Archive Binge
#561: Nov 8th 2011 at 2:07:00 PM

Does it count if the GM imposes one on himself?

  • No longer allowed to intricately describe spiders jumping to attack PC of brand-new, arachnophobic player.
  • I can't let said player use her +12 Bluff skill too often,even if it did get the party out of a too-strong encounter.

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
Eyclonus Since: Jan, 2001
#562: Nov 9th 2011 at 5:03:55 AM

  • The phrase "Key to her heart" does not confirm my Bard's suspicions that the frigid elven princess is not a warforged infiltrator.
    • The fact that she is not bedding my charisma 25 Bard is not corroborating evidence.
  • Elve's are immune to Charm, therefore Charm is not "the key to her heart".
  • Neither is Glibness.
  • She's just not into Kobolds.

UseYourDelusion The Prince of Crows from Nostramo (4 Score & 7 Years Ago) Relationship Status: Halfway to Pon Farr
The Prince of Crows
#563: Nov 9th 2011 at 5:27:34 AM

My character is not allowed to shout "Let's do the Time Warp AGAIN!" every time the party travels through time.

While my cross-dressing evil half-drow Bard may technically be a Sweet Transvestite, he is frow Waterdeep, Faerun, and not Transsexual, Transylvania.

Actually, any reference to RHPS is not allowed.

onFyre Science! from Blighty Since: Apr, 2009
Science!
#564: Nov 9th 2011 at 9:17:34 AM

[up] That reminds me of the time...

The party doesn't need to know my theories on time travel if I'm just going to quote from Haruhi Suzumiya and Red Dwarf.

edited 9th Nov '11 9:18:39 AM by onFyre

Eyclonus Since: Jan, 2001
#565: Nov 10th 2011 at 1:30:53 AM

  • Tier One Operator is not a valid choice for polymorph or summon spells.
  • "Hammer Of Dust" is an appropriate title for a magic weapon or giant golem warmachine, not a man in his late 40s with a massive beard and an assault rifle.

WeirdUsername Since: Nov, 2010
#566: Nov 10th 2011 at 6:24:12 PM

Mutants & Masterminds:

  • I may not play a Magical Girl, especially if the other player looks like something out of the Dark Age of Comic Books.

  • I may not play a lone Power Ranger.

  • I may not play an entire team of Power Rangers.

edited 10th Nov '11 6:28:06 PM by WeirdUsername

Pentigan Fwomph from The Underverse Since: Apr, 2010
Fwomph
#567: Nov 10th 2011 at 7:02:41 PM

I may not use the following reasons for the following classes to have succubi as traveling companions:

Paladin: "I converted her with my... Power."

Druid: "She really, really likes my animal form."

Any half-demon: "It was an arranged marriage."

Mage: "Backstory spellbook."

It's clearly a case of backroom political albumizing.
darnpenguin Yakka Foob Mog from one friend to another Since: Jan, 2001
Yakka Foob Mog
#569: Nov 18th 2011 at 9:31:04 AM

  1. Never again, under any circumstances, is my anime RPG character to be "Gary Busey as himself."
  2. Nor are my gnomes ever to be based on Michael Gross.

Add me on Skype: Al Cook (darnpenguin)
Exelixi Lesbarian from Alchemist's workshop Since: Sep, 2011 Relationship Status: Armed with the Power of Love
Lesbarian
#570: Nov 18th 2011 at 9:38:27 AM

Being a wiseass doesn't increase my Sorcerer's magical effectiveness, despite what some sources would indicate.

Mura: -flips the bird to veterinary science with one hand and Euclidean geometry with the other-
KnightofLsama Since: Sep, 2010
#571: Nov 19th 2011 at 2:26:10 AM

[up]Now you make me want someone to make a caster counterpart to the Dashing Swordsman.

Michael So that's what this does Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Drift compatible
So that's what this does
#572: Nov 19th 2011 at 3:30:10 AM

[up]That actually sounds like you're describing a lot of Changeling The Dreaming characters.

(The more inventive you are with the actions you perform to use your powers, the easier they are to use)

Archereon Ave Imperator from Everywhere. Since: Oct, 2010
Ave Imperator
#573: Nov 19th 2011 at 11:11:52 AM

In Dark Heresy games, I am no longer allowed to Impersonate the entire Grey Knights Chapter using crappy knockoff power armor and about 999 cardboard cutouts.

(This happened in the first place A. because my GM imports frequently imports stuff from D&D into all of his other games, including the rules about bluffing (natural 20 cool) and B. because it wasn't all that serious of a game to begin with.)

This is a signature. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
UseYourDelusion The Prince of Crows from Nostramo (4 Score & 7 Years Ago) Relationship Status: Halfway to Pon Farr
The Prince of Crows
#574: Nov 20th 2011 at 5:34:28 PM

All drow males are NOT latent homosexuals. This issue is closed.

75% of drow GDP does not come from BDSM gear.

When meeting a group of pilgrims on their quest for truth, I am to tell them "May Corellon light your way", not "The truth is out there".

No matter how many dots my Toreador has in Subterfuge and Presence, she cannot seduce Beckett.

Basing any character on John Munch is strictly prohibited.

darnpenguin Yakka Foob Mog from one friend to another Since: Jan, 2001
Yakka Foob Mog
#575: Nov 21st 2011 at 7:54:43 AM

[up] Beckett only swings one way: Himself.

Note to self: figure out if the protean discipline allows for self-cloning at high enough levels.

Add me on Skype: Al Cook (darnpenguin)

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