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Boxen whatever he can Since: Jan, 2013
whatever he can
#1060451: Mar 1st 2016 at 6:45:16 PM

Then do both.

dead devotion
ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#1060452: Mar 1st 2016 at 6:47:10 PM

...Can you prove you didn't steal my dress?

RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#1060453: Mar 1st 2016 at 6:49:09 PM

-nods-

Mm.

I've thought that through.

-thinks for a moment and sighs- Though I can't help it but- the feeling of guilt still lingers.

The idea behind the Red Winter- the fact it was planned...

I almost feel responsible for laying the foundations for that idea.

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
Boxen whatever he can Since: Jan, 2013
whatever he can
#1060454: Mar 1st 2016 at 6:52:07 PM

How do you feel guilty for that?

dead devotion
RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#1060455: Mar 1st 2016 at 6:59:38 PM

The prospect behind the Red Winter- is demolishing a society so you can build a new one.

I once believed in a similar approach to effecting change.

That was when I formed the Knights of Aurelius- an organization like the Aurelian Scholars, only- militant.

No longer believing that we could change the world by co-operating and influencing a natural change towards the good, we were impatient- to enforce the golden society through arms.

Contradicting one of the primary precepts of Aggripan thinking.

I'm not saying he couldn't have come up with it on his own, but... I know that the logic that the Knights of Aurelius would have- could in extremes come to something like that.

An influence upon his mind. For the Knights- exist to this day.

And I'm the one who started them off.

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
Trip Since: Mar, 2012
ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#1060457: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:02:41 PM

That's... more or less what you just asked me.

Boxen whatever he can Since: Jan, 2013
whatever he can
#1060458: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:05:10 PM

...You are doing things now to make up for it. And you will continue to do so.

dead devotion
RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#1060459: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:11:02 PM

I know.

It won't stop the guilt.

Reminders of my mistakes, like this...

I've made peace with it- I've had to, I've lived long enough.

But it won't stop me from feeling that twinge of remorse.

I used to refuse being called Letholdhus- because that name of mine, and not Leo- has my mistake etched into its' memory- into Legend.

The Scourge of Athens.

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
Boxen whatever he can Since: Jan, 2013
whatever he can
#1060461: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:17:10 PM

...

dead devotion
HilarityEnsues Since: Sep, 2009
#1060462: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:17:41 PM

So, ya like climbin' trees like that often?

ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#1060463: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:18:11 PM

So... no. That's not what I did.

Trip Since: Mar, 2012
#1060464: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:21:25 PM

"... Whatever."

   "I wanted to see if I did! ... I don't."   

RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#1060465: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:22:30 PM

-sighs- ... I don't know when I'll feel ready- or redeemed.

That's what's on my mind.

The thing throwing me off.

Seeing Ankarlon- in that brief moment of time when I wasn't visiting him as a dead man.

Knowing that I'm not going to find the same rest as others.

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
HilarityEnsues Since: Sep, 2009
#1060466: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:22:38 PM

Aw... oh well. I reckon ya learned something.

ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#1060467: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:23:04 PM

Do I... really look like a murderer?

Trip Since: Mar, 2012
#1060468: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:24:14 PM

"Murderers usually don't."

   "-still clinging tightly- Yeah..."   

ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#1060469: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:25:55 PM

That doesn't make sense.

Boxen whatever he can Since: Jan, 2013
whatever he can
#1060470: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:37:05 PM

...In your position, I wouldn't know if I could blame you.

dead devotion
RegularDefender MAYONNAISE from Blighty Since: Nov, 2012 Relationship Status: Singularity
MAYONNAISE
#1060471: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:41:22 PM

Every time I die, I see him.

And every time I see him, I have to leave.

To go back to life.

So... yeah.

It's a difficult thing to deal with.

1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post
HilarityEnsues Since: Sep, 2009
#1060472: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:41:46 PM

Hey, it's alright... I'm here for ya, Alice.

Trip Since: Mar, 2012
#1060473: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:43:10 PM

   "I know, I know..."   

"... shut up."

ramuf Electric Heart from the Shining Throne Since: Jan, 2013
Electric Heart
#1060474: Mar 1st 2016 at 7:44:01 PM

-Just blinks again, somewhat taken aback-

What?

Trip Since: Mar, 2012

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