(From the kitchen.) Birds? I'm afraid I slept through that ordeal... Though it does explain all the red feathers, I suppose.
(Stares intently at the pudding box, using his PROBABLY AUTISM powers to remember the pudding making process step-by-step.)
...I can do this... (Insert Hard-Work Montage here.)
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019(The lighting in the kitchen goes all epic and dramatic. Near is bathed in an otherworldly blue glow. This song starts playing out of nowhere.)
...No thank you...
...I've got it...
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019(Exits the kitchen dramatically, a Dramatic Wind somehow starting up indoors and blowing from behind him.)
Pudding should be ready... In exactly ten minutes. (Tosses empty juicebox behind his back and into the trash can. The Latin chanting lets up as soon as it lands.)
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019

Hm, that's a shame. Poor bastard wanted to show me something, but I was too tired. I think I'm gonna try to make pudding on my own this time. Would any of you like some? It's vanilla flavored and goes nicely with graham crackers.
make it through this year if it kills you yet | 2001-2019