Rejoice, it is I, a priest from the most holy and immaculate, yes, Catholic Church.
As I am sure you have been made aware, in this, the year of our Lord, two-thousand fifteen, it has became necessary to exact a new tithe tax from the people of the world, this proposition, brought forth by our most holy Pope, was passed by the United Nations with a unanimous vote. The tithe is exactly monthly, and it is one hundred dollars American per person, with the price being cut down to only fifty dollars American for practicing Catholics.
-nods- I do. And yes- I did often go out myself to deal with raiders on the coasts.
I was a man of action- and I accomplished a lot in my long life.
I wish I could've done more, but- no use crying about the past.
-nods- Nnn... Y-yes...
1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this postIts' easy to let the power go to your head. But as a King, I ultimately have the most responsibilities, and the people need to be treated well. They are the hands and body of the state- and I am the head.
-nods- Nn... I- will... find her... or- Cynewulf...
1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post

Believe me- it is nothing too bad. I traveled a lot with my retinue- mess was sort of par for the course.
-he does look rather like he stepped out of the Dark Ages-
-nods- Nn... m-my... l-lover.
1.5 imperial gallons of tea were consumed during the writing of this post