Foil the above poster's eeeevil plan.

I blow up the sun to keep you from setting it on fire.

I shall demonetize EVERY youtube video!

Everyone jumps ship to another video sharing service and Twitch, destroying Youtube entirely. You become a disgrace to everyone in the Tech industry and never get another job. Also, you're forced to pay everyone what you owe them from your own money.

I shall perform the Gangnum Style Dance!

Luckily, through social media and hijacking of CCTV footage, I triangulate your position, hiring a team of merciless killers with an attitude straight from the nineties to steal a thermonuclear warhead, and plant the device in the middle of the city you plan to dance in.

Moments before you start the music, it detonates, and I make sure to visit the memorial service.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.

-

I’m going to make sure everyone is happy!

Mandatorily happy.

edited 17th May '18 4:39:00 AM by RandomWriter413

I star in a TV show that's nothing but me badmouthing every Sacred Cow under the sun. Soon, everyone is so angry that whatever you were using to make them happy is overloaded and explodes.

---

I'm gonna go back in time and help Hitler win...at tennis!

Well, I'm also going to travel back in time with the most skilled tennis player I can find and beat you and Hitler into the dust!

---

I'm going to replace everyone's heads with bowling balls! Bowling balls!

hey

I become the spiritual successor to Cuphead. Naturally, that means fighting until I'm strong enough to use my bowling ball head powers against you.

I'm going to avenge Tropes!

Check out this fancast I made! Any votes would be greatly appreciated!

I lure you into a trap and use that mib device so you forget tropes ever existed.

I'm going to steal Velocity 9 and go on a superpowered rampage!

Cornelius, but do not waste in useless pity the few moments left in which to escape from the hands of the enemy.

I replace it with Anthrax!

I shall make a sandwich, AND NOT EAT IT!

I'll smuggle a potato chip into it... AND MAKE YOU EAT IT!

And then I'll kill all the lolis with a Lollichop.

...

Unfortunately for you, I'm playing as the Spy. HAhahahahaha (snort) hahahaha!

I'm going to build an Amusement Park of Doom. What makes it so scary, you ask? I overprice the tickets!

Check out this fancast I made! Any votes would be greatly appreciated!

I Mind Rape the entire planet and turn all of humanity into one gigantic collective consciousness. Then humanity has no need for money anymore making it impossible for anything to be overpriced or to have any price at all because all resources are jointly controlled by the swarm.

I go back in time to make sure that Firefly only gets one season!

Fox already did it for you, and better.

All of the world's web browsers have been hacked so they can only access TV Tropes at any given time. Stay awhile and listen. Stay...FOREVER.

I hope you get tiny bits of eggshell in all your omelettes for the rest of your life!

I become CEO of TV Tropes, buy every other website, and integrate them into this one.

I declare the Star Wars Holiday Special to be canon!

The Fan-base tears you to shreds both online, and in the real world when i release your info to them.

I shall turn all the potato chips in the world into beet chips!

edited 27th May '18 2:04:21 PM by Jaxfirebus

I shall eat all the chips so there are none to turn!

I shall spoil Avengers: Infinity War!

I used to plug my deviantart here but turns out the link was too long.

I put on the Infinity Gauntlet and... bonk you on the head. I haven't seen the movie, I don't know what it actually does.

I'm going to spoil the ending to Tropers: the Series!

Check out this fancast I made! Any votes would be greatly appreciated!

Too late, I've already infected you with both laryngitis and some other disease famous for causing exhaustion so profound you can't even type!

I shall harness the power of Noodle Implements to Take Over the World!

If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.

Did you hear about Miss_Desperado's plan? Yeah, can't believe how badly that went.

I shall become the Internet itself!

You have to bear witness to everything there. And due to archives, it will never go away.

I shall seize 2 extra scoops of Ice Cream!

edited 31st May '18 1:30:47 PM by TheBest345

For those that I love, I will fight!

Before you make it to the ice cream stand, I contact Sam Starfall while he's being chased by an angry mob and ask him to run next to the ice cream stand that you're headed to. The chase derails as the mob stops for ice cream. There are so many people, they leave no ice cream for you.

I shall put this Damsel in Distress into an enchanted sleep, after I feed her a meal with onions so that no one will want to kiss her awake! Muahahahaha!

If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.

Heck, I like onions. I'll do it if no one else will. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I'm going to force everyone to stay on TV Tropes forever! Why don't you stay a while?

Check out this fancast I made! Any votes would be greatly appreciated!

You fool! My procrastination abilities allow me to lag behind the site on everything, even collapsing my own forum threads at a cost so deep and destructive that few can stand against it.

I will simply upload my brain to Tv Tropes and watch it fall apart around you!

——

I’m going to give everyone free ice cream!

You forgot to make your plan evil, so I let it be and it foils itself.

I build a Kill Sat that will automatically start destroying major cities one by one if I don't regularly send the password to stop it, and demand to be made ruler of the world.

edited 1st Jun '18 2:54:24 AM by FGHIK

I missed the part where that's my problem.

I hack it and make it blow your base (that convently holds the power sorce for the kill sat) to atoms.

Now im going to use the hacking skills i gained offscreen to rob banks from the comfort of my own home!

edited 1st Jun '18 8:09:59 AM by vjoi

Cornelius, but do not waste in useless pity the few moments left in which to escape from the hands of the enemy.

I find my buddy, sneak into your house and manually trip the circuit breaker. Then my buddy fights you while I check your computer for batteries to remove.

I shall send a ninja to steal popcorn from moviegoers! Just one, as more would put them on the wrong side of Conservation of Ninjutsu.

If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.