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KarlKadaver Stupid Man Suit Wearer from Just offscreen... Since: Apr, 2011
Stupid Man Suit Wearer
#2276: Aug 30th 2012 at 12:11:11 PM

"YOU HAVE HUGE TEXT! THAT MEANS YOU HAVE HUGE BRAINS!"

After opening a friend's email, this was my immediate response. In my defense, the text was huge.

edited 30th Aug '12 12:11:23 PM by KarlKadaver

Give the world the best you have and you will get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.
chihuahua0 Since: Jul, 2010
#2277: Aug 30th 2012 at 4:14:10 PM

"Nobody have ever drowned in pancake."

It's a slogan.

Fuzy2K Li'l Shardfinder from Toad Highlands Since: Dec, 2009 Relationship Status: Who needs love when you have waffles?
Li'l Shardfinder
#2278: Sep 1st 2012 at 6:33:34 AM

You can't have a baby sucking on a nipple in this restaurant! People are eating here!

It had to do with this.

Also,

Well, crap floats. Especially when it's filled with farts...

edited 1st Sep '12 6:42:52 AM by Fuzy2K

You can not go to Utah again after you have eaten Utah and have not eaten.
Hermiethefrog Since: Jan, 2001
#2279: Sep 2nd 2012 at 10:25:30 PM

"Group British butterflies is heading to the boy's dorms but I'm going to base the placement of group lithping platypus on where yours goes."

UmLovely The Darkness Grows from 2814 Since: Apr, 2011 Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
The Darkness Grows
#2281: Sep 3rd 2012 at 5:21:45 PM

"Okay, okay. OH GOD YES!! I'm calm now."

RISE
Explosivo25 How fleeting... from Beach City Since: Mar, 2012 Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
How fleeting...
#2282: Sep 4th 2012 at 2:20:57 PM

"Mr. K's a nipple-gazer? TELL ME MORE!"

My friend is in a different bio class than me with the same teacher. Apparently the teacher was surprised he was able for his eye level to be that high on a particularly tall student (as in, his eye level was at the student's nipple level).

I don’t even know anymore.
HeroShepherd from Earth Since: Oct, 2012
#2283: Sep 5th 2012 at 6:02:13 PM

did you go back in time turn into a woman and give birth to me?

dRoy Professional Writer & Amateur Scholar from Most likely from my study Since: May, 2010 Relationship Status: I'm just high on the world
Professional Writer & Amateur Scholar
#2284: Sep 5th 2012 at 6:03:55 PM

Probably this.

Continuously reading, studying, and (hopefully) growing.
CrystalGlacia from at least we're not detroit (Living Relic)
#2285: Sep 5th 2012 at 7:16:47 PM

"I think I know what happened to my wang. I threw it into my cubby, loose, without putting it safely into my flute case. So it's probably floating around the band room somewhere."

In my school's marching band, the coordinate sheets distributed to every member that show exactly where we are on the field and when are placed inside a clear plastic sleeve with an elastic string attached. Some people wear them around their waists so that the plastic sleeve hangs down in front like a certain male-exclusive organ, and that is why we call them wangs. It should all make sense now.

"Jack, you have debauched my sloth."
KarlKadaver Stupid Man Suit Wearer from Just offscreen... Since: Apr, 2011
Stupid Man Suit Wearer
#2286: Sep 5th 2012 at 7:17:43 PM

"It is here! The Terror from Beyond the Uterus!"

I was talking about a toddler.

Give the world the best you have and you will get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.
DrFurball Since: Jan, 2001
#2287: Sep 5th 2012 at 8:24:12 PM

"Y'know, Superman? You're a jerk when you're drunk."

The punchline to a joke I was telling someone.

CompletelyNormalGuy Am I a weirdo? from a place where folks put cream cheese on hot dogs (Oldest One in the Book)
Am I a weirdo?
#2288: Sep 5th 2012 at 9:31:36 PM

I do believe I know that joke.

Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.
SlendidSuit Freelance Worrywart from Probably a Pub Since: Oct, 2011
Freelance Worrywart
#2289: Sep 6th 2012 at 3:22:16 AM

"Well I'm headed into town, but I'll be tied up for a bit getting myself scalped."

I was going into town for a haircut.

Gimme yer lunch money, dweeb.
Olivetree ETERNAL from The Grave Since: Mar, 2012 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
ETERNAL
#2290: Sep 6th 2012 at 7:50:15 AM

"Dictators Anonymous"

"I'm just trying to get over a coup..."

"You'd never do something as irrational as dying."
UmLovely The Darkness Grows from 2814 Since: Apr, 2011 Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
The Darkness Grows
#2291: Sep 6th 2012 at 5:21:02 PM

"I can't do it in there, I'll get blood all over the place."

You really don't want to know.

RISE
Superkim111 Since: Apr, 2012
#2292: Sep 6th 2012 at 6:31:20 PM

"First we'll cut off your leg. Then we'll attach a tiny foot to the stump. Next we fill that shoe with sausage. And then we put the sausage-filled shoe on your tiny foot. We can call you Peg-legged Pete."

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
chihuahua0 Since: Jul, 2010
MasterInferno It's Like Arguing on the Internet from Tomb of Malevolence Since: Dec, 2009 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
It's Like Arguing on the Internet
#2294: Sep 6th 2012 at 11:04:40 PM

Also on the internet:

"That's like bringing a dead baby joke to life! (no pun intended)"

Was commenting on a friend's Facebook status; another friend of his had posted that she was considering dressing her baby as a zombie for Halloween

Somehow you know that the time is right.
Phoenixor Departed days ahead. from Scotland. Still. Since: Mar, 2010
Departed days ahead.
#2295: Sep 7th 2012 at 12:18:44 PM

It's like that one party where you get way too drunk and insult everyone, then wake up in the morning going "Oh god what have I done." And the past hundred years have just been us running around apologising to the world while nursing a hangover.

Talking about the American Revolution/colony era and Britain's part in the whole thing.

I guess we could go... wherever we please.
Olivetree ETERNAL from The Grave Since: Mar, 2012 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
ETERNAL
#2296: Sep 7th 2012 at 2:35:20 PM

Conversation with Hopey:

Me: Looking around... I think I need to take some glasses downstairs!

Hopey: Do it with awesome.

Me: How does that work? I see no ninjas around and Napoleon never calls me back. FRENCH SWINE!

Hopey: Ah. Just be you.

Me: But... I am Napoleon -plot twist-

Hopey: ... Mother of god.

"You'd never do something as irrational as dying."
Takwin Polite smartass. from R'lyeh Since: Feb, 2010
Polite smartass.
#2297: Sep 7th 2012 at 7:00:49 PM

Courtesy of my mom: (singing) "There's a duck in my butt- hallelujah!"

I've returned from the depths to continue politely irritating the good people of Tv Tropes.(◕‿◕✿)
Explosivo25 How fleeting... from Beach City Since: Mar, 2012 Relationship Status: THIS CONCEPT OF 'WUV' CONFUSES AND INFURIATES US!
How fleeting...
#2298: Sep 9th 2012 at 6:38:25 AM

"Congratulations, Oscar Proud. You have just annihilated the censors."

I'm watching The Proud Family Movie, and Oscar is giving Penny shit about her outfit. He nearly called her a hooker!

I don’t even know anymore.
HeroShepherd from Earth Since: Oct, 2012
#2299: Sep 9th 2012 at 3:13:38 PM

the whole universe is just God's glorious sewer.

Takwin Polite smartass. from R'lyeh Since: Feb, 2010
Polite smartass.
#2300: Sep 10th 2012 at 11:43:34 AM

^ Hahaham, Futurama.

"I am cold, tired, and reeking of fish love!"

I've returned from the depths to continue politely irritating the good people of Tv Tropes.(◕‿◕✿)

Total posts: 17,879
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