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pvtnum11 OMG NO NOSECONES from Kerbin low orbit Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: We finish each other's sandwiches
OMG NO NOSECONES
#1: Dec 21st 2010 at 2:12:40 PM

I went back to my Firefly fic, The Movers, and realized that my protagonists are always just one step ahead of either the named (but unseen) antagonist, or from... someone, nearly all of the time.

Now, I'd like to exploit this for dramatic tension - with no drama, all I got is a bunch of characters doing daily life.

So, a nutshell list of the antaognistic things which have transpired during the last 450 pages, roughly in chronological order:

  • Rival gang 14 years in the past offed a number of friends of our protagonists.
  • Fast-forward to the story itself, and the same gang leader from then is beginning to harass our protagonists again, after they inadvertantly foil one of his schemes and draw attention to themselves.
  • Minor protagonist character is kidnaped, tortured and pumped for information, after the antagonist leaves a dead ringer behind in order to throw the protagonists off the trail of finding their friend. Which fails, as the tataoo was done wrong and another pprotagonist noticed.
  • It is revealed that the Blue Sun coproration is using the antagonist as a pawn in their own scheme. And that one of the protagonists old friends from years ago ended up dead under mysterious circumstances.
  • Same minor character is rescued and the protagonists decide to leave the planet.
  • Spurious contact is spotted a few times as they travel from planet to planet, station to station, doing smuggling runs. Basically, they're being followed.
  • Someone hacks the bank account of the guy with all the funds, so they're pretty much broke now. Minor protagonist decides he doesn't like working for free and gets off at the next stop.
  • On one of their stops, they're warned that the gang leader from years ago is looking for them, but Blue Sun isn't involved with the previous events.
  • Their reactor is sabotaged (but hasn't been revealed to be sabotoage just yet), so that it fails in the middle of deep space, meanign that they are unable to change course if they wanted to.
  • Despite the above, a deep-space recovery ship is able to come to their aid, restart their reactor safely and send them on their way. For free. And with three of their senior officers of the recovery ship arranging to become paying passengers right now.
  • Two days after that, the recovery ship is seen on long range sensors astern, attacked and destroyed.
  • The senior officers from dead recovery ship are now scared out of their minds and won't divulge any details. (They knew what was going to happen, but are afraid to talk.)

Not yet written, but I'm planning to include:

  • The minor character that got off the ship earlier sends a frantic warning, but the message is jammed at the source before anything solid is mentioned. (I'm not going to kill him off, though.)
  • A spurious sensor contact is spotted astern, heading for the exact same planet our protagonists are heading for, still two weeks distant.

I'm seriously considering making all those events related.

So, what does the trope hive-mind think? Is that sufficient dots with which to weave a picture of the Big Bad, while still keeping the Big Bad out of sight?

edited 21st Dec '10 2:15:06 PM by pvtnum11

Happiness is zero-gee with a sinus cold.
pvtnum11 OMG NO NOSECONES from Kerbin low orbit Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: We finish each other's sandwiches
OMG NO NOSECONES
#2: Dec 23rd 2010 at 11:29:55 AM

Shameless bumpage here - although I might not include the "jammed at the source" event.

Happiness is zero-gee with a sinus cold.
colbertimposter Since: Dec, 1969
#3: Dec 24th 2010 at 4:41:46 AM

"Is that sufficient dots with which to weave a picture of the Big Bad, while still keeping the Big Bad out of sight?"

I think so.

Otherwise,

This is a wonderful outline, and I'm interested in seeing how it ends up.

One tip, because you mentioned an absence of the lead antagonist for most of the plot being a problem, is to make lesser antagonists that are thought to be the lead antagonist until they die/until they're real purpose is revealed. Final Fantasy Tactics and the first Harry Potter are good examples of this as well as just about any detective TV show, if you want to look at other works that have done this effectively.

Good luck, and keep us posted.

pvtnum11 OMG NO NOSECONES from Kerbin low orbit Since: Nov, 2009 Relationship Status: We finish each other's sandwiches
OMG NO NOSECONES
#4: Dec 24th 2010 at 1:34:28 PM

Glad you liked the outline. Most of that happened by accident, but with just a bit of editing, I was able to link the events together - still got some more to do, but should be fairly easy.

Concerning minor villains (not in order, just tossing them out there):

There's a bodyguard that works for the Big Bad for awhile, but due to a longtime previous professional arrangement with the Cool Old Guy on the protagonist side, the bodyguard decides to skip town rather than do what he gets paid to do. The body guard is the one who warns the protagonists of the involvement of Blue Sun corp's involvement.

Also, the Big Bad hired a local gang to do some of his dirty work. As the Cool Old Guy used to run a gang, he's able to pretty much talk it out with them in a mostly civil discussion, while learning about their contract and what they're guarding.

Our smuggler protagonist sees an ambush go down in broad daylight, the Big Bad is trying to take down a rival mafia-type organization (paid to do it by Blue Sun). Caught in the crossfire, the smuggler snaps off a few shots in self-defense while trying to get out of the killzone. He manages to kill the leader of the ambush team, which is what managed to get the attention of the Big Bad in the first place. Right man at the wrong place, so to speak.

Tipoff on an asteroid mining station that a rival organization is looking for them, and guards the access tunnel leading back to their ship. Cue a last-ditch effort to distract the thugs so they can sneak past, power up the ship quickly, and leave ahead of schedule.

Not related to the Big Bad at all: Chance encounter with some Reavers, if only to show that the smuggler isn't nearly as cool and collected as he appears to be - the event makes him come totally unglued. As it's unrelated, I might cut it.

I also have a bunch of character-development - the overarching Big Bad plot just sort of ended up happening, but I was aiming more for a character-driven thing. Serendipity?

Happiness is zero-gee with a sinus cold.
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