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Website / Library Of The Damned

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Library of the Damned is a website dedicated to riffing bad fanfiction. It was founded in 2011 by "Lyle", and quickly gained the aid of fellow riffers Ghostcat (AKA Ghostie), Taco Magic, Frozen Poodle Meat, Addicted Reader, and Psychic Librarian. As time passed, Frozen Poodle Meat and Psychic Librarian have had to depart due to real life reasons, and AR has left, come back, and seemingly left once more. "Lyle", Ghostcat, and Taco Magic have all remained full-time members of the staff, and four new permanent additions, Herr Wozzeck, Erttheking, SC, and Admiral Sakai have hopped onboard, although Erttheking has gone on extended hiatus. There is also a robust cast of infrequent guest riffers: Angie, Bat Jamags, agigabyte, Kitty Noodles, and Delta XIII. The Library has riffed such infamous fanfics as Its My Life, Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen and My Immortal, and has recently blown past two thousand posts.


Each full-time Librarian releases a riff on their assigned day of the week, Monday through Saturday, though the schedule remains flexible to account for those pesky real life matters. Sundays are reserved for guest-snarkers, posted on a first-come, first-served basis. In lieu of a guest riff, the Librarians will post fan art or a special spotlight for good fanfiction on Sundays.


Library of the Troped:

  • An Axe to Grind: Glasses wields an axe which is comically large and heavy.
  • Axe-Crazy: Monocle, to the point where the only known solution for keeping him under control is tying him up and locking him in a closet.
  • Bifauxnen:
    • Shades of the Specs and Co. wears purposely gender-obscuring clothing and has her hair cropped short, so as to avoid catcalls.
    • Ert's OC Nora falls under this trope as well.
  • Big "NO!": The infamous Darth Vader soundclip, and several other methods, are frequently used as the punchlines of jokes.
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  • Big "SHUT UP!": There have been a number of riffs where the riffer has been driven to scream this and similar demands of silence, usually directed at a particularly aggravating in-story character.
  • But Thou Must!: Librarians can't escape from their riffs. Their co-riffers won't allow it.
  • Cool Sword:
    • Teh Specs has the most obvious example - a sword that he, himself, forged, and even named after this trope.
    • Monocle has a gigantic sword.
    • Sports Shades, though hailing from the Azuchi-Momoyama Period of Japan, employs a two-handed Chinese sword.
    • SC has used several cool swords as deterrents against the DRD, including Yato and Jetstream Sam's gun-katana.
    • Herr Wozzeck employed a rapier for a short time as a dumb-author-beating-tool, but only because he accidentally broke his treasured Mahler hammer, Alma.
  • Costume Porn: Occurs in more than a few stories, but Shepard's dress-slash-armor from "X-Com: Mass Effect" was probably one of the worst offenders: A dress worn over a suit of armor that's somehow made of ''alloy, micro generators and shield generators''.
    • Ridiculously impossible armor design seems to be a recurring theme in Library stories, from the "custom power/leather armor mesh" of "United under two skies" to the vacuum-sealed, adamantium hoodie from "Captain Rapist’s Half-Assed Adventure" (A.K.A. "Trapped").
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  • Flat "What": A riffer is likely to do this on the heels of a character saying or doing something unbelievably dumb.
  • Hammerspace: Teh Specs has a storage pocket inside his own mind where he stores all the swords he collects. This has the drawback of decreasing his intellect with each new sword, though.
    • Shades can summon guns out of thin air, so long as she knows what they are and that they exist somewhere.
    • Swenia keeps several weapons in her blouse.
  • I Call It "Vera":
    • "Lyle" has a cattle prod named Carlos.
    • Taco Magic has a gong named Horatio.
    • Herr Wozzeck wields Alma, the Mahler hammer.
    • SC has a trifecta of firearms: a pistol named La Bella Pistola, a riffle named Messer Rifle, and a shotgun named Sir Shoot-Gun.
    • Ghostcat has a crowbar, named... well, Mr. Crowbar.
  • Schedule Slip: It's not as if riffers don't have lives, so this trope comes up fairly frequently. However, SC is especially guilty of this, sometimes going entire months on end without a single post.
  • Spell My Name with an "S": SC's full user handle is Specstacular SC. It has proven shockingly difficult for people to spell, hence why he simply goes by SC in his riffs.
    • Teh Specs' name is not a memetic joke, that is his full title of address.
  • Ninja: There's a virtual army of them sneaking about the Library.
    • The Bata clan serves under Ghostcat, wielding butter as a tool of both unexpectedly brutal efficiency, and vicious trolling of poor SC.
    • "Lyle" has the services of a young Narutoverse kunoichi named Koori.
    • Soup Ninja Kira usually hangs about with the Bata clan, though she seems to be a bit of a nuisance.
    • Contacts obtained his supernatural powers of shadow manipulation from a ninja-like group, but he's been sworn to silence on pain of death about the matter.

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