- "You know, I get a lot of people asking me about stuff I hate now. You know, they'll write to me and say, 'Hey, what do you think about deforestation?' . . . Just about anything you can think of. And that's cool, because now it's like my job to hate shit, and I'm good at it, so it's all cool."—2 the Ranting Gryphon, "Abortions"
Matthew Davis, better known as 2, the Ranting Gryphon, is a furry comedian whose specialty is amusing, often profanity-laced commentary on various subjects that annoy, infuriate, and otherwise perturb him. As demonstrated by the page quote, it's pretty much his job to hate various things, and he's good at it.
Tropes observed in 2's rants include:
- Animation Age Ghetto: His rant on Zootopia was about an experience where he saw the titular movie, only for a woman to treat him with suspicion of being a child molester because he was there by himself. 2 spends the rest of the rant arguing against the mentality that animation is only for children."You can eat all of my personal dick, because I like cartoons!"
- Bald of Awesome: And he looks a lot like Spider Jerusalem, to boot.
- Berserk Button: Whatever the subject of his rant happens to be, but a few have stuck out over the years.
- The excuse of "it's so horrible I can't look away" when justifying looking at something gross or disturbing. 2 says "the rest of us got over that psychology ages ago."
- poke massive holes in that argument. People who use beliefs to mock or belittle everyone else. He once performed a rant on a furry who thought he was actually a dragon, and everyone else was too "close-minded" to see his true form, causing 2 to
- The opinion that "cartoons are for kids." He devoted an entire rant to this based on an experience from a movie theater after watching Zootopia, and usually ends his stand-up comedy specials arguing against this mindset.
- Big "NO!": In one version of his "Accidental Toast" rant:"Hey, stop that toast!""We can't! There will be toast!"
- Card-Carrying Villain: Played with; in his "Portal of Evil" rant, he says that he must officially be evil because the Portal of Evil had an article on him.
- Cluster F-Bomb: Most of his rants and routines can be considered this, though there are a few that fall more into the Precision F-Strike territory.
- Everyone Has Standards: 2 once made it very clear that when he rants, one line he will never cross with the concept is doing it purely for personal profit.
- Naytheist: He was once studying to be a preacher. Not anymore; he's swung all the way to gnostic atheism.
- Precision F-Strike: The "Global Warming" rant - as opposed to most of his rants, it has precisely three pieces of profanity: two "craps" and one "dumbasses".
- Rant Comedy: Well, he is 2, the Ranting Gryphon (emphasis on "ranting").
- Rant-Inducing Slight: He admits that there's no point to his Olives rant, but the incident that inspired it was so stupid he just had to talk about it.
- The Scrooge: He's done two separate rants on Christmas, one calling it over-commercialized and another asking "is twenty-four hours a year [of kindness] really all we can manage to squeeze out?"