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Epona: Link, please, you don't need to kill the guy.
Link: I strongly disagree.

Douchebag Link Returns to Termina is a continuation of xanauzumaki's The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask abridged series, using flash animation instead of footage from the game, aside from the background.

As the title shows, Link returns to Termina for unknown reasons known only to himself, when he comes across Majora, who managed to survive whatever Link did to him at the end of the previous series. After finding the Happy Mask Salesman's corpse, Link is visited by a member of the guild, who says that since Link killed (and ate) the guy who killed the salesman, he has the right to be the next salesman. Link almost agrees, but when he learns that he must swear fealty to the goddesses, he decides to not be their bitch again and declines the offer. However, the league member tells him that he doesn't have a choice, and after three days, he'll gather the rest of the league to force him to become the next mask salesman (mostly because complication happened in the league, which would take three days to clear up). Link and Majora must join forces to both stop the league and avoid another mask salesman. Hilarity Ensues.


Douchebag Link provides the following tropes:

  • Adaptational Badass: The League of Interdimensional Salesman is made up of merchant characters who did not have the backing of the Goddesses, let alone reality-bending powers.
  • Adaptational Ugliness: In the game, Fierce Deity Link is a tall, muscular adult Bishounen. The Fierce Deity Link of this series is just a Palette Swap of the normal Link, who's drawn as a scrawny kid with a big head and large eyes.
  • Anything That Moves: Let's list the things that Cremia banged at some point:
  • Ax-Crazy: Link fits this trope like you wouldn't believe.
  • Berserk Button: Played for Laughs. After a traveler calls Link a son of a bitch, he appears to lose it, and terrifies the guy, promising him a slow death. After the guy all but wets his pants...
    Link: Nah, I'm just fucking with you.
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  • Bestiality Is Depraved: At some point in her life, Cremia fucked both a cow and her dog. The cow incident left Romani in a catatonic state.
  • Big Bad: Zunari is the lead member of the League of Interdimensional Salesman, and almost everything Link does (aside from crimes done For the Evulz) is done to avoid being forced by him into becoming the new Mask Salesman. Zunari is eventually killed and upstaged by Link himself as the Fierce Diety.
  • Break the Haughty: What happens to Link when his sword is stolen.
  • But for Me, It Was Tuesday: In Episode 9.
    Deku Butler: You made me your slave!
    Fierce Deity Link: I did?
    Deku Butler: How do you not remember this?
    Fierce Deity Link: Truth be told, the earlier days of my conquest are...kind of a blur.
  • Bus Crash: The Happy Mask Salesman is found dead, having been shot in the back of the head by the traveler Link killed.
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  • Cassandra Truth: With a side helping of Captain Obvious. Tingle contacts the lead member of the league of salesmen to inform him that Link is collecting masks. The member counters that Link is going to be the next mask salesman anyway, and that none of that would be suspicious at all. He is then told to never contact him again.
  • Curbstomp Battle:
    • Once Link got the Fierce Deity's Mask, nothing stood in his path. The Salesmen, the big bads up to this point, are all chopped down by Oni Link's sword beams. Then he turns his double-helix blade to Majora, threatening to kill him too. He pretends to hear him out, but Link quickly drops the facade and cleaves Majora in two.
      • Speaking of the Salesmen, it's Tingle who finds out what's going on and makes the first move, felling Goht just by tossing a map at him! Had he been given a second move before being cut down, there's not a doubt that he likely would have killed Link as well.
  • Did You Just Flip Off Cthulhu?: The Deku Butler acts incredibly snarky to Link, who at that point donned the Fierce Deity's Mask and basically became the new Kefka. When Link comments on this, his reply is that Termina being destroyed, his son being dead, and him being Link's lackey has numbed him to the thought of death.
  • Enemy Mine: Link and Majora, at least until the penultimate episode.
  • Face–Heel Turn: Link was obviously no saint, but at least he fought for the side of good...when not for shits and giggles, of course. As of the end of episode 8, he pledges to become a full-on villain and take over the land he saved from Majora: Termina.
  • The Gadfly: Pretty much sums up Link's attitude towards Majora or people in general when he isn't killing people. Since he's the Hero of Time, he can abuse just about anyone in the world.
  • The Hedonist: Having completed his duties as the Hero of Time, Link's life consists of cheap thrills, including senseless destruction and drug use. However, as he admits, nothing ever comes close to the sensation he got from talking down a bully in his early childhood. It's eventually implied that Link will give up this lifestyle, seeing as how even the Fierce Deity Mask can't give him the nirvana he wanted.
  • Heel–Face Turn: Implied with Link at the end of episode 9.
  • I'm a Humanitarian: Link eats a man in the first episode. He even comments that cannibalism isn't that bad.
  • I Need a Freaking Drink: Link after Cremia unveils her...interesting backstory. Mixed with Brain Bleach.
    Majora: What happened? You look... off.
    Link: We're going to the bar.
    Majora: What?
    Link: I said we're going to the bar.
    Majora: Why do we need to-
    Link: BAR! NOW!
  • Ironic Echo: "It's never fucking enough, is it?"
  • Noodle Incident: Pretty much the MO of Cremia. Apparently, she fucked a cow
  • Oh, Crap!: Eyegore's very surprised to find Link's Sword in his eye rather than an arrow.
  • Reality Ensues: When Link loses his sword, he starts interrogating people on where it is. The first person he finds is an adult. Link is still a child. Things go about as well as expected.
  • Sadistic Choice: Link gives one to a poor schmuck he comes across in episode one, giving him the choice of either cutting off his left arm, or his right arm. After hesitating for a moment, the guy gives up his left arm. Link cuts off the right arm anyway.
    Traveler: I'm right-handed You Bastard!!
    Link: Yeah, I figured as much.
  • Start of Darkness: Link's was knocking out the eye of a bully with a rock. From that point onward, he set out trying to recapture the sense of elation he got from that event by committing more and increasingly violent acts.
  • Self-Made Orphan: Cremia killed her mother when she found her and her brother naked in the barn.
  • Set Right What Once Went Wrong: After realizing that he has gotten nothing out of his rampage as the Fierce Deity, Link eventually gives up and goes back in time to undo all the damage he caused.
  • The Dreaded: Tingle has become this, being one of the few people who can scare Link and Majora. Appropriately, he has a similar voice to Mr. Popo.
  • Throwing Your Sword Always Works: How Link kills Eyegor.
  • Too Much Information: Poor Link is subjected to this when helping Cremia out to get another mask.
    Link: ...I didn't ask for any of that.
  • Understatement: What Link tells Majora when he says that Cremia's... past is some fucked up shit.
    Link: Understatement of the fucking century.
  • Villain Protagonist: Our two "heroes" consist of an Ax-Crazy Physical God Manchild who had previously tried to drop a moon on Termina and a Sociopathic Hero who snarks at just about every single person he doesn't kill and got into this mess by eating a guy.
  • Vomit Indiscretion Shot: Deku!Link vomits through his bagpipes onto Ingo's face after getting too drunk at the milk bar. He's given his mask out of pity, so it evens out, somewhat.

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