Web Video / Attack on Titan Abridged

Attack on Titan Abridged was an Abridged Series^note Or rather, a one-shot parody, since a single episode isn't a series made by Takahata101 and TehExorcist of Team Four Star; it was, of course, based on the anime and manga series Attack on Titan.

The first episode of Titan Abridged premiered on YouTube in late 2013; YouTube removed the video for copyright violations two months later. Team Four Star then said it would host the show on their home website—which it did for a time—but then the group received a takedown notice that forced the episode offline. The combination of legal issues and the changing schedules and workloads of other TFS projects forced the group to abandon the series. Takahata is still pissed off about that. Before this, though, TFS had released a video with various characters singing, in honor of the premiere of Attack on Titan official English dub on Adult Swim's Toonami block.

Do not confuse this with Abridged on Titan, though one of the cast members from that series does appear here.

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During its brief existence, Attack on Titan Abridged contained the following tropes:

• Anguished Declaration of Love: Armin screams that he loves Eren as he's about to be swallowed by a Titan, though it's doubtful that Eren was paying much attention.
• Animal Motif: Eren's throwaway line about Jean's horse-face is taken up to eleven.
  Shadis: Now why can't you be more like that majestic stallion Jean over there?!
  (Jean literally neighs with laughter)
• Bad "Bad Acting": Everything Thomas says is loud, stilted and with really weird inflections, almost to the point of sounding like the G-Man's more annoying younger brother.
  • He's trying to sound like Thomas & Friends.
  • He also sounds suspiciously like the way Esper Roba's family talked in Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series
• Be Careful What You Wish For: After Eren narrates that he wishes some kind of adventure would happen, a Colossal Titan appears over the walls and we get this:
  Eren: *whispers to himself* Why did I wish for this adventure?
• Berserk Button: Titans are Eren's trigger. Especially if someone mocks that his mom was eaten by one.
  • And unwittingly exploited by Connie when the Colossal Titan appeared again.
  Connie: Aw, sheeit! The wall's broken and the Titans are gonna get in! And the people are gonna get eaten by the Titans! And the land will get taken over by the Titaaaans!
  Eren: *as he is maneuvering his way up the wall* TITAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
• Big Brother Attraction: Even more overt than the original. After Eren tells off Jean:
  Mikasa: I want to have sex with you really bad right now.
  Eren: God, don't make it gay, Mikasa!
• Big "NO!": A variant when Eren rappels back up the wall screaming "TITAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!"
• Boisterous Bruiser: Reiner. He even calls himself "a beast", until he gets tossed by Annie a few seconds later.
• Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick: Eren: "We'll join the military! We can get all the food, authority, and vengeance that we ever wanted!"
• Bring My Brown Pants: Hannes' reaction to the titan that kills Eren's mother.
• Catchphrase: Connie has "Oh my God X, you SUCK!/you're so fucking cool HOLY SHIIIIIIET!"
  • *huacck*
• Comically Missing the Point: After listening to Armin rant about how horribly unprepared the soldiers are for battle, Eren simply compliments Armin on his perception.
• Creepy Monotone: Thomas' voice is robotic and emotionless, even when speaking from inside a Titan's throat. He's more annoying than creepy, though.
• Disproportionate Retribution: Sasha (aka Potato girl) is forced to run what is presumably a very long distance around the training grounds for saying that she dislikes being called Potato Girl. Given that she's going through boot camp to fight what essentially amount to lumbering, skinless behemoths (ironically named Titans), its somewhat Justified.
• Dissonant Serenity:
  • Doug Walker announces the hundreds of thousands of people who died when the Titans stormed the walls in a cheery manner, as "Celebration" plays in the background.
  • The tannoy playing soothing music as the Titans rush in.
  • Eren talks about killing Mikasa's kidnappers as if it were a wonderful, happy memory.
• Does This Remind You of Anything?: Sasha lustfully storing some meat in her "special box."
• Downer Ending: Considering the series' fate with being cancelled, it ends with Eren getting nom'd by a Titan.
• Drill Sergeant Nasty: Shadis was this in the original series, but here it's taken up to eleven.
  "What's the matter, Yeager? It's too difficult for you? Well, if you wanna quit, that's fine. We got plenty of openings at the custodial department, so you can clean up your SHIT PERFORMANCE!!!!"
• The Elevator from Ipanema: Soothing music is played over a tannoy to calm the people when Wall Maria is stormed by Titans. The Titans run rampant and slaughter everyone. The music is turned up higher.
• Ensign Newbie: Everyone who was forced to fight the Titans after the Titans come back after five years are noobs fresh out of training.
• Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": Take a guess at what Sasha is named in the credits and the series:
  Shadis: Well, uh, from now on, you'll be known as Potato Girl.
  (Beat while Sasha munches the potato)
  Sasha: I don't like that name.
• The Friend Nobody Likes: No one likes Thomas.
• Get A Hold Of Yourself Man: Eren to Jean who has started flipping his shit after receiving orders to go fight the Titans (while their superiors hole up in a fortified bunker no less) right after they have graduated from the Academy.
• Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter: During one of Jean and Eren's altercations, a quick flashback shows Eren doing what appears to be......inserting something that has been censored into his mouth. Turns out it was some REALLY disgusting bread.
• God Guise: A traumatized Armin mistakes a grey-bearded Titan for God.
  Armin: God help us! *Titan lumbers over* Oh, hey God! *Titan picks him up to eat* OH GOD NO!
• Gratuitous Japanese: Eren cries out "YAMETE!!!" ^note  Which means "Stop!" as his father is giving him his "medicine" in a flashback.
• Hilariously Abusive Childhood: "Now son, stop being a faggot and take your medicine!" "NO DADDY, YAMETE!!!"
• Inelegant Blubbering:
  • Sasha after being forced to run for hours.
  • Jean after Eren calls him out on his shitty attitude.
• Intelligible Unintelligible:
  • Armin speaks so quickly that he either descends into total waffle or just can't be understood at all. None of the other characters seem to have any trouble understanding him, though.
  • Carla only speaks in grunts, though it's enough to communicate with her children.
• Large Ham: Shardis.
  "WELL SWEET MOTHER TERESA ON THE HOOD OF A MERCEDEZ BENZ, YOU SOUND LIKE A MAJESTIC FUCKING EAGLE! DO YOU SING?! HARMONIZE WITH ME MAGGOT!!"
• Mass "Oh, Crap!": All (or at least most of) the soldiers sent to fight the Titans who've returned after five years of relative peace share in this considering they're literally noobs fresh out of training with no actual combat experience.
• Misanthrope Supreme: Armin seems to fit this role, as he's happy so many people have died - including his parents and grandfather!
• Mood Whiplash: After Eren pulls Armin out of a Titan's mouth, only to get eaten himself, happy music plays during the credits. Considering that the credits (including the music) are in the style of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, it's entirely appropriate.
• Mythology Gag: In the original series, the Armored Titan was drawn to look like Brock Lesnar. When the Armored Titan first appears in this, Brock Lesnar's theme music can be heard in the background.
• The Nicknamer: Shadis, of course. As well as Potato Girl (above), he calls Jean a "majestic stallion" and Eren "Mr. Jaeger-bombastic".
• Nightmare Fetishist: The King, according to Shadis.
• No Indoor Voice: Kitz, Shadis, Thomas and Connie.
• By "No", I Mean "Yes": Eren on fighting a Titan with only one arm:
  Eren: I'm not saying I could take him with one arm...but I could totally take him with one arm.
• Parental Abandonment: Grisha, Eren's dad. He apparently has a habit of leaving his family high and dry.
• Perverted Drooling: Sasha over Shadis' luscious slab of meat.
• Pre-Asskicking One-Liner: "How about a nice slice of vengeance?"
• Precision F-Strike: Anytime Eren curses.
  • "Hey, FUCK that guy."
• Revenge Before Reason: Eren is even more overtly obsessed with revenge here.
  Eren: TITAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNN!!!!!! *lands in front of the Colossal Titan* Hey. It's been five years. How about a nice slice of vengeance?!
• Sarcasm-Blind: Thomas is most certainly this and unfortunately brought this upon himself.
  Thomas: EREN! DID YOU KILL THE COLOSSAL TITAN?!
  Eren: Oh totally! Can't you see its giant dead body?!
  (Beat while the camera pans across the ground where the Titan should have landed, except there's no Titan)
  Thomas: ARE YOU BEING SARCAS-
  Eren: OF COURSE I'M BEING SARCASTIC!!
• Shout-Out: Shadis does this a lot.
  • "Well, SWEET Pacific Rim-job!"
    • And the Pacific Rim main theme plays when Eren tries to take on the Colossal Titan.
  • The Spongebob Squarepants stock line, "My Leg!", can be heard as bystanders are crushed by boulders.
  • The Shadow of the Colossus soundtrack plays when Hannes is about to take on the Smiling Titan, as well as when Carla is being grabbed by it.
  • "OH YOU THINK THIS IS HAREM OF THE DEAD, YOU SHRIMP-DICKED FUCKNUGGET?!"
  • "Y'know what might work better? GOING THE FUCK TO SLEEP!!!"
  • Brock Lesnar's theme music. That is all. The Armored Titan was made to look somewhat like Lesnar too, so it fits.
  • The soothing music played when the titans invade Wall Maria is Daybreak. Bonus points for somebody saying "oh that's nice" as soon as the music starts playing.
  • When Eren is forced to watch his mother die, the camera closes on his horrified face as "The Sound of Silence" plays.
  • The music and title card that close out the episode is a direct reference to It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
  • During the training orientation, Shadis called Armin an "Aryan coconut" when asking him for his name. By coconut, that is a reference to the character Coconut Head from Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide. It even makes sense if you see the similarity between Armin and Coconut Head.◊
  • As Eren and his squad head out to fight the Titans near the end of the episode, it's to the triumphant tune of "Stand Out" from A Goofy Movie. Cue Mood Whiplash.
• Soundtrack Dissonance: Thousands of people dying from the Titans and starvation? Celebrate good times, COME ON!
• Strangely Arousing: In response to the Perverted Drooling example above, Connie "had the most awkward boner".
• Tempting Fate: Eren has a really bad habit of this. Lampshaded when the Titans breach the wall.
  Eren: Don't worry! Maybe the Titans won't get in.
  (Titan is seen within the Wall)
  Mikasa: They're in.
  Armin: Damn it, Eren, you keep jinxing shit!
  • Later on, Eren says they're going to take the fight to the Titans. Three seconds later, the Colossal Titan appears right behind him.
• That Came Out Wrong
  Shadis: What about you, freckles? Where do you see yourself in three years?
  Recruit: I plan to give my body and service to the king, sir!.
  Shadis: Oh. OH YOU THINK THIS IS HAREM OF THE DEAD YOU SHRIMP-DICKED FUCK NUGGET?! Boy if you can't pull a protractor out of your wiener-slot, AND TURN, then you shouldn't even bother trying to be with the king!
• And There Was Much Rejoicing: Armin is happy that his family is dead.
• Tranquil Fury: When dealing with Sasha's stupidity of eating during attention, Shadis acts so mellow, you can feel the rage boiling inside him.
  Shadis: So... what's going on in this neck of the woods? You got something to eat there?
  Sasha: Yeah, I'm just eatin' a potato.
  Shadis: Oh! Potatoes, eh? You, uh, you like some potates?
• The Unintelligible: Armin, at times.

• Unlucky Childhood Friend: Mikasa. Eren thinks her advances on him are "gay."
• Upper-Class Twit: Jean is utterly snooty to everyone and claims he is "clearly from a better class", but constantly gets shot down or chewed out by everyone he meets.
• Wide-Eyed Idealist: Thomas, and it grates on the others.
  Thomas: "COME ON GUYS, LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE."
  Eren: "What bright side?!"
  Thomas: "I DON'T KNOW BUT WHEN WE FIND IT, WE SHOULD LOOK UPON IT."
  Eren: "I fucking hate you, Thomas."
  Connie: "Thomas, you SUCK!"

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