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Can you handle the life of a super-sized family?

Super-Sized Family is an online game where you play as the parent of seven children: Torri, Christian, Duncan, Sullivan, Virginia, Jessica, and Jonathan. It makes the game seem challenging by giving it dramatic music and earning you an army title like "general" or "private" based on how well you played.

You play it using the mouse button and have eight rooms to navigate between: downstairs, there's the bathroom where you clean, the hallway where you pay bills, the kitchen where you load the dishwasher, and the laundry room where you, well, do laundry. Upstairs, there are the kids' bedrooms: Torri has her own room, while Christian and Duncan share a room, Virginia shares with Sullivan, and Jessica shares with Jonathan.

It also features a Christmas version called "Holiday House", whereupon you need to make cookies in the kitchen, write Christmas cards in the hallway, answer the door for carollers, and it also features the living room, where you wrap gifts.

You are made to guess what the kids need by what they're doing. Here are the things they can need:

  • Threats: Can be given to Torri if she's on her phone or Christian if he's sticking his tongue out at Duncan.
  • Math help: Can only be given to Torri. If she needs it, she will be holding her textbook and looking confused.
  • Diapers: Can be given to Jessica, Jonathan, Virginia, or Sullivan. If Jessica or Jonathan needs one, they will be crying and sitting in a puddle. If Virginia or Sullivan needs one, they will point downwards.
  • Pacifiers: Can only be given to Jessica or Jonathan. If they need one, they will be crying and their pacifier will be lying aside them.
  • Books: Can only be given to Duncan. If he wants his book, he will proclaim, "There's nothing to do!".
  • Band-aids: Can only be given to Virginia and Sullivan, who will have a visible cut on their finger and be holding their finger up and crying.
  • Medicine: Can be given to all kids, who will appear unhappy and green in the face if they need it.
  • Cheering up: Can be given to all kids, and it's given to them if they're crying for no reason. Interestingly, this is represented with a heart and the word "comfort" in the standard game, but a handkerchief in the Christmas game.

There is also a "panic" button, which you can press for a maximum of three times, that makes Torri reset all the problems.


Super-Sized Family provides examples of

  • Ambiguously Absent Parent: For unknown reasons, the parent not represented by the player does not feature.
  • Character Tics: When Virginia's standing, she holds her arms up and to her sides, almost as though she's shrugging, except when she's sick.
  • Christmas Episode: "Holiday House" is a version of this game set on Christmas.
  • Delivery Stork: On the game's homepage, a stork is seen above the house carrying a baby with a pink blanket.
  • The Diaper Change: One of the things you do with the four youngest kids is change their diapers.
  • Dreaming of a White Christmas: The Christmas version, "Holiday House", has the house and yard covered in snow in the homepage.
  • Expressive Health Bar: If a kid is sick they will look green-faced and Virginia will have her arms down (she normally holds them up.)
  • Good with Numbers: Implied for the player character, who Torri always comes to with advice for mathematics.
  • Green Around the Gills: When the kids are sick, their faces turn green.
  • Heart of Happiness: The button to cheer a sad kid up is represented by a heart labelled "Comfort".
  • Inelegant Blubbering: Whenever the younger kids cry, they will be audibly wailing, as opposed to the older kids, who are animated as crying but you can't hear it.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Implied for the player character, who doles out "threats" if the kids misbehave, but otherwise seems like a good parent.
  • Magic Antidote: Both the band-aids and the medicine seem to cure the children instantly.
  • Massively Numbered Siblings: You're playing as the parent of seven kids.
  • Mundane Made Awesome: This is just a game about day-to-day life as a parent of seven, but it's hammed up with the music and army titles.
  • No Name Given: All the kids have names, but the stork and baby seen on the homepage, you, and the Christmas carollers are not named.
  • Not So Above It All:
    • Torri mainly acts like a responsible oldest sibling, helping out when the going gets tough and asking for help when she needs it. However, she's described as a "screaming child" in the game's official description and sometimes talks on her phone despite apparently not being allowed.
    • Duncan is also described as a "screaming child" in the description despite never misbehaving during game play.
  • Pink Girl, Blue Boy:
    • Jessica has a pink pacifier and Jonathan has a blue one.
    • Virginia wears a pink dress and shoes, while Sullivan wears a blue shirt, although downplayed as Virginia has a blue flower on her dress.
  • Princess Phase: Implied for Virginia, who wears a crown on her head.
  • Sick Episode: The kids can get sick and need to be medicated.
  • Vague Age: All we know about the characters' ages is that the player character is old enough to be the parent of a teenager, Torri is a teenager, Christian and Duncan are both older than four but younger than thirteen, Virginia and Sullivan are both older than one but younger than five, and Jessica and Jonathan are babies, likely twins, and both have one tooth and can sit up on their own, making them probably around six months old.

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