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Please Don't Touch Anything is a pixel art point-and-click adventure game developed for Ludum Dare 31 by Four Quarters and published by BulkyPix and Plug In Digital. The idea is that the player is asked to watch a control panel while the person working at it is off on a bathroom break. Aside from a cryptic poster on the wall, you are given one simple instruction: Please don't touch anything. So, naturally, your first instinct will be to play around with things, right?

As of December 7th, 2016, the game has an Updated Re Release on Steam, called Please, Don't Touch Anything 3D. In addition to 3D graphics, the new version includes a room around the panel, small changes both to finding the endings and the endings themselves, and five brand new endings. Every ending is cool.

A version for the Nintendo Switch is set to release on November 22nd, 2018, with new mechanics, puzzle solutions, and endings.

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SPOILER WARNING: A large part of the experience of this game is playing around with different aspects and variables and discovering the various endings for yourself. While spoiler tags will be used wherever necessary, the nature of this game will mean that unmarked spoilers will be rampant on this page. You Have Been Warned.

In Other Words: Please, Don't Read Anything.


Please Don't Touch Anything contains examples of:

  • Alien Kudzu: The Panda Ending
  • Anti-Frustration Features: Several upgrades are made from the itch.io version into the Steam and 3D versions.
    • Steam:
      • The "Bender" puzzle was reworked, the solution to which going from being the binary code for the letter W, a slightly obtuse puzzle based on the "WORK" instruction, to the binary code represented by dots on the informational flyer.
      • The initial code needed for the Roman numeral panel was originally based on the number of individual lines in the bar code on the information sheet. This was changed to a depiction of a ladder which, when rotated, became Roman numerals.
      • The Braille in the itch.io version became math equations in the Steam version, making the associated puzzles less Google intensive.
      • The numbered bullet points on the informational flyer become the code of a later puzzle, but in the Steam version, they are out of order, making it clearer to the player that they are to be used as a code.
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    • 3D:
      • The Illuminati ending no longer closes the game, meaning you don't have to restart it.
      • Hidden around the room are Morse Code Pamphlets, which are useful, considering they changed the letters needed for the Morse code ending.
      • In the VR version, it's much more difficult to take notes for future endings. Luckily, the whiteboard is completely changeable, and is preserved between resets.
    • A more subtle case for all versions: The roman numerals for the code 132231 are a palindrome so that regardless of how it's rotated, it can be easily read as the correct code.
  • Bait-and-Switch: One of the Satanic endings has the clouds and buildings growing happy faces like that of a child friendly cartoon.
  • Be as Unhelpful as Possible: The game itself. Your only instruction is to not touch anything.
  • Big Red Button: The game starts with the console having only this button. Pressing it opens up more things to click.
  • Cruelty Is the Only Option: The entirety of the gameplay is you finding a myriad of ways to destroy the city you are supposed to be monitoring. Technically speaking, it is possible to play the game without doing anything particularly cruel to the city, but doing so would mean that the player would miss more than half of the game's content.
  • Everything Makes a Mushroom: The easiest ending to get in the game (and the only one shown in the trailer) results in the on-screen city getting destroyed in a mushroom cloud.
  • Featureless Protagonist: You. Only the console and its surrounding area are visible.
  • The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You: The Illuminati Ending crashes the game.
  • The Illuminati: One of the endings (and the accompanying achievement) hints at their existence.
  • Moon Logic Puzzle: Some of the puzzles are quite a reach in terms of logical progression. Particular mention goes to the itch.io version of the Robot ending, which requires you to punch in the binary code for the letter W. There is zero indication that this is what you have to do, and even after realizing it, it still makes little to no sense. This was altered in the Steam version to using the dots on the information poster, next to the word "work," to represent binary. A bit simpler, but still a stretch.
  • Multiple Endings: The game has twenty-five, all depending on what you do (or don't do); as such, context of how to get the ending is important in understanding it. Of these endings, the first eleven are present in all versions of the game, while the remainder are Steam only.
    • Peace: You literally touch nothing. After some time, your coworker comes back, and the same beginning dialogue loops until you restart. In the Steam version, your coworker jokingly asks if an apocalypse would've happened while they were gone. A poster of a divine figure appears on your wall.
    • Shutdown: You push the red button so much that the TV screen goes dead. A paper which looks like a formal reprimand appears on the wall.
    • Mushroom: You push the big red button, causing a switch to pop up. You then flip the switch, and push the button again, leading to the city you are monitoring blowing up. A poster of a giant mushroom that reads "I ♡ Mushrooms" appears on the wall.
    • Satanic: You push the red button twice, causing a panel of Roman numerals labeled I, II, and III to pop up. In the itch.io version, the number of lines that make up the barcode on the informational poster equates to the code - 213121. In the Steam version, the strange ladder drawing on the informational paper becomes Roman numerals when turned to the right - 132231. Two new panels open up, one of them with a lever; you pull the lever to the left. A 0-9 keypad appears. Using the bottom row of Braille for itch.io and the top row of the math equation for Steam, you will get the second code (itch.io's is 1066, Steam's is 8367). Inputting this into the keypad causes a 7x7 panel to appear. You create a pentagram on this panel, causing a frightening face to appear on the screen as it begins to drip blood. A poster with a pentagram and skull appears on the wall.
    • Illuminati: You push the red button several times, unlocking the hammer. With the hammer, you smash the TV screen, revealing a button behind it with a question mark symbol on it. Pressing it causes the entire screen to shake furiously before suddenly cutting to the beginning of the game. In the Steam version, the screen suddenly shifts to an Illuminati eye, with four small symbols in the corners of the screen, before the game suddenly crashes. A poster of the Illuminati symbol that reads "True?" appears on the wall.
    • Back to the Past: Follows the same path as Satanic until the second keypad appears. Using the top row of Braille for itch.io, and the bottom row of the math equation for Steam, you will get the second code (itch.io's is 3748, Steam's is 8232). After punching this in, a clock with a date on it appears at the bottom of the screen. Pushing the left arrow causes the screen to show what appears to be a woolly mammoth as the date on the clock changes to say "-99:99:9999". A poster of a person that appears to be Doc Brown is placed on the wall.
    • Back to the Future: Everything is done exactly the same as in Back to the Past, but when the clock appears, you push the right arrow. This causes the clock to read "24:10:2077" as the screen shows the city from before, but completely destroyed. The moon also seemed to be coming apart, as if it has been blown up. A poster of what appears to be Marty McFly appears on the wall, connected to the previous poster of Doc Brown.
    • Yin-Yang: You push the red button several times and unlock the screwdriver. With the screwdriver, you open the screwed on panel to reveal four colored buttons. Using the misspelling of "GRAB" on the poster, you push the buttons in a certain order (for Steam, it's Green-Red-Blue-Blue; for itch.io, it's Green-Red-Yellow-Blue), causing the world on the screen to be inverted in both position and color. A poster of the yin-yang symbol appears on your wall.
    • Black Hole: Follows the same path as Satanic, but when the 7x7 keypad appears, another keypad with numbers 1-4 also pops up. In the itch.io version, following the numbers on the information flyer, these must simply be pressed in order (1-2-3-4). In the Steam version, the flyer has numbered them out of order. Following this, you punch in 1-2-4-3. This causes a black hole to appear out of nowhere and engulf the city. A poster with what appears to be an opening black hole is placed on the wall.
    • Robot: Follows the same path as Satanic, but when the lever pops up, you pull it to the right. A panel with only two buttons, 0 and 1, appears, with the word "Bender" in the middle. In the itch.io version, the solution comes from the word "work," specifically the binary code for the letter W - 01110111. In the Steam version, the dots on the poster next to the word "Work" hold the solution - 0010001. This causes a massive robot to appear and destroy the city, and a poster of Bender that reads "Kill All Humanz" appears on the wall.
    • UFO: Follows the same path as Back to the Past, until both hatches open. In both versions, the solution corresponds to the arrows on the information flyer; on the hatch which says "Don't do it!", click the top left and top right buttons in order (left-right-right-left). This causes a UFO to appear and level the city with a laser ray. A poster with a space invader appears on the wall.
    • Asteroid: Follows the same path as Satanic until the 7x7 panel and 1-4 panel pop up. Using the bullet point labelled 3 on the informational flyer and the "look and say" sequence, the player must input 1-2-1-1 (as in, one 1, one 2, two 1's). A small keyboard that makes three unique notes appears. You must match the 8-bit notes that pop up in the game's theme. Doing this causes asteroids to rain down on the city, and a poster of what appears to be a lizard recreating the Ghostbusters logo appears.
    • Cthulhu: Follows the same path as Satanic until the 0-9 keypad pops up. You click the red button a few more times to produce the screwdriver. With it, you unscrew the small panel of wires connected to the screen, causing a dimmed number screen to appear at the bottom of your console. You then click the "Don't do it!" paper several times until it comes loose, revealing the name Pisano Leonardo, discoverer of the Fibonacci sequence. Using this, the player must input the first nine numbers of the sequence (011235813). Doing so causes what looks to be a massive demon to rise up from below the city, presumably conquering it. A poster of Cthulhu appears on the wall.
    • Panda: Follows the same path as UFO initially. On the informational paper, underneath the directional arrows that one would normally follow for UFO, the word "correct" can be read upside down. The player must do the opposite of the original code for UFO (bottom right-bottom left-bottom left-bottom right). This causes a small counter with the number "276" written on it to appear. The player must click the grey button 276 times and then push the red button. This causes a massive overgrowth of vines and other plants to level the city. A poster with the image of a panda appears.
    • City Boom: You hit the restart button repeatedly until a mini game called "City Boom" pops up on the screen, which requires you to hit the red button repeatedly in order to drop bombs on the city in an effort to level it completely. Clearing the level causes a sticker of a small airplane to be placed on your console.
    • Bloody Baby: You unlock the hammer and smash the red button with it. This causes an alarm to begin blaring. You smash the button repeatedly until a bloody fetus emerges from it, and with it, several bloody organs pop out of many spots on the console. Essentially Whac-A-Mole; you must whack all of the organs and the baby itself repeatedly, until you can kill it. A strange poster with what appears to be bloody entrails and a smiling heart appears on the wall.
    • Death Star: You unlock the screwdriver and remove the instructional panel, revealing three clocks. To proceed with the ending, all three clocks must be lit with a green light - the only way to achieve this is to have your system's clock set to midnight. This causes a small punch card to appear. The player must input the number of red dots on each row into the roman numeral panel. This causes a massive beam of light to completely eradicate the city from existence. A small poster with an image of the Death Star appears.
    • Happy Buildings: Follows the same path as Panda until the small counter appears. You must hit the grey button 666 times and push the red button, causing a panel with strange lit up symbols on it to drop down from the ceiling. You must shut off all symbols except the four which are visible in Illuminati. Doing so causes the city to develop smiley faces and begin bouncing up and down happily. The poster of the skull and pentagram, originally obtained in Satanic, changes to show the skull now bearing horns and glowing red eye sockets, while the poster itself appears to have been burned at the edges.
    • Sand Worm: To complete this ending, City Boom, Bloody Baby, and Death Star must already be completed. Follows the same path as Satanic until the lever appears; after pulling the lever left and inputting the usual code, the player must also use the inverted arrow code at the "Don't do it!" panel. You remove the informational flyer with the screwdriver, and using the letters and numbers behind it, you form a sort of cross on the 7x7 panel by treating the letters as a grid system (B4, D1, D4, D7) and completing the pattern with the missing associated button (F4). Doing this causes a diamond to appear. You then use the poster from Bloody Baby (the bloody entrails) to get the next code number; 4020. Doing this causes a crack to appear in the console. You then open the screwed on panel that contains the colored buttons. To get the last clue, you must have seen the completion screen from City Boom, which showed flickering letters that gave away the color scheme - Yellow-Red-Blue-Blue. Lastly, a panel with a hexagonal socket opens up. You insert the diamond here and push the button. This causes a massive worm to come up from the ground, engulfing the city whole. A poster of a sand worm appears.
    • Stanley Parable: To initiate this ending, at least five endings must be completed. Follows the exact same path as Shutdown. After restarting, the screen shifts to say, "Awaiting input." The player must push the red button, and all the new red buttons that appear, until the screen says, "Thank you for cooperation. You got the job, Stanley." A small ID card with the name "Stanley" on it appears on the wall.
    • Papers, Please: To initiate this ending, the Stanley Parable ending must be completed. By clicking the passport at the floor of the booth, a denial and approval stamp appear above the passport, as a person wearing an Anonymous mask stands in front of a height measuring wall. Denying him causes a dark sky to cover the city as flags pop up from the buildings. A small badge from Arstotska is clipped to the screen.
    • Earthquake: Follows the same path as Mushroom until the switch pops up. Next to the red button is an arrow pointing right; clicking the spot next to this arrow causes a small arrow button to appear, pointing in another direction. Follow the sequence of these arrows until a 3x5 grid pops up. The player must click the buttons on the grid until the entire grid is lit up. Following this, a massive earthquake splits the city in half. A small badge of the Earth split in two will be attached to the screen.
    • Space: Follows the same path as Robot until the "Bender" panel pops up. Below this, a small hand lamp appears. Picking it up and moving it across the console reveals a massive amount of hidden text. In particular, a code to the left of the screwed on panel appears, revealing the code number (2001). You reset the ending and then follow the same steps as Satanic until the 0-9 keypad pops up. Type the code in to reveal a dialer with letters that can spell out a word. Spell out PLUTO and push the button, receiving a key. With the screwdriver, open the colored button panel and hit the red button repeatedly to open up a keyhole. Put the key in, and a rocket will shoot into space. A small rocket badge will be taped to the screen.
    • Water: Follows the same path as Space until the small hand lamp appears. You use the lamp to hover over the "Don't do it!" text, which reveals that the word "dot" is highlighted. Using this, you must input the Morse code for "dot" into the console, using the "Bender" panel (with 0's representing dots and 1's representing dashes). This causes the city to be completely flooded.
    • Coffee: For this ending, you must have completed all the other endings. Hit restart and your coworker will again ask you to watch the screen, but with added dialogue. Your coworker tells you that the console is really a coffee machine and tells you to help yourself. You click the red button and a cup of coffee appears, followed by the end credits on the screen.
  • Nightmare Face: The Satanic Ending. The Illuminati Ending features a Nightmare Eye.
  • Nothing Is Scarier: The Illuminati Ending ends by making the window fullscreen (if it isn't already), with an eye suddenly opening at you, which automatically closes the game.
  • Number of the Beast: 666 is curiously drawn onto the side of the machine.
  • Overly Long Gag:
    • Unlocking the Panda Ending requires you to click a button 276 times.
    • Another ending requires you hit the same button 666 times.
  • Retraux: Both in terms of graphics and sound effects.
  • Rewarding Inactivity: Alternatively, you can sit back for about a minute perfectly obeying the game's title instruction. And an achievement for waiting 3 minutes longer.
  • Schmuck Bait: Natural in a game where the entire point is directly disobeying the instructions given in the title. One of the endings, however, requires the player to defy this trope.
  • Time-Limit Boss: The Essence of Machines (the bloody baby that emerges from the red button after hammering it) has to be hammered thrice before a trail of blood reaches the restart lever and forces it down.
  • Trial-and-Error Gameplay: No instructions are given regarding how to play the game. Only random guesses and a bit of Insane Troll Logic can help you complete all the endings.
  • Unexpected Gameplay Change:
    • "City Boom! Press button to drop bomb!", a minigame that has a chance of appearing whenever the game is reset.
    • The "Essence of Machines" ending is a whack-a-mole boss fight.
  • Unrealistic Black Hole: The city gets consumed by one of these in the fittingly-named "Black Hole ending".

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