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Tropers / She Who Chews Gum

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You! Yes, you, with the shifty eyes! What are you doing here? What do you want? How did you get in my house at this time of night?.. You want to know a bit about me? Well why didn't you say so you little scamp! Now get out of my pantry, I think you've got your dick in the spice rack.

I'm sixteen, have a rather unhealthy addiction to Reddit (I want to leave, but... the cat pictures! So many cat pictures!) and am quite Scottish. And a bit Irish, but that's not particularly important, I just wanted to point that out in case Ireland starts a systematic extermination of the rest of the human race, and quite frankly it's always nice to have your bases covered. Now don't fret you little ruffian, the Scottish may have a reputation for being drunk and angry, but I can categorically assure you that such an old, haggard stereotype has no place in modern socie-DID YOU JUST KNOCK OVER THAT VASE?




  • U R funny and also have great taste in music. Also, I put the vandalism at the top of the list instead of the bottom because it was easier. Hope that's OK with you. -Alma

  • Well at least now I'm first. -Land Of Gold
  • I'm quite sute that you should be able to log into (well technically create a new cookie for) your old account as long as you remember your password or get it reset, but welcome back. *offers coffee* - Bisected8

  • FUCK YEAH, FUCK MICROSOFT. ALSO....... balls. —blamspam

  • Microsoft... They can be absolute bastards at times! —A Crack In Time
    • Indeed!
  • Ye young maiden, queen of hams, whoso did die to us yon tropers, for a most egregious failure of the system Micro-soft did rob her of that which she called her "handle" or life. Most of us would have given up and never returned to yon TV Tropes as a troper after such a system-induced-death, but Rifflet did. She did the impossible, punched Death in the face and stormed yon afterlife with a Foe-Tossing Charge against everyone. What's in a name? Would that, which we call a "Rifflet", would be so awesome sans title, if it were called "She Who Chews Gum"? The answer is: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! You rock, Ma'am. ~ Aliroz The Confused.
    • That, my good reptile, was brilliant. Thank you very much.
  • Hey, rifftraxster got a new page. Now is my chance to write the greatest, most over-the-top vandalism ever seen! It shall be loud, it shall be proud, it shall be worthy of She Who Speaks Loud Words! For millenia, tropers shall speak of this vandalism and glorify She Whose RAEG Rage Strikes the Heavens, and he who wrote upon her page. I shall cause the legacy of She Who Strikes Like Lto remain eternal! Now, She Who Chews Gum, I shall *sees Aliroz's vandalism* darnit, someone beat me to it. —Yarrunmace
    • Oh well, I like it anyway!
  • You see this? -points at your dead computer- THIS IS WHY YOU USE MAC OS X OR LINUX. Got it? Good. Also, that X is pronounced "ten". Say it right, I'll give ya a cookie. -Tre
    • All, right... I can do that... LINUTEN!.. OH, GODDAMMIT.
    • I have a horrible secret... I have made burgers out of that cow! IT WAS LOVELY!
  • *runs in and spraypaints the entire page mercilessly* —a vandal
    • Aw crap, I'm gonna have to pay for that! I can't even sell my organs, they suck!
    • I'll help you! -brings in big bag of money- — Crack
      • You fool! I can't pay in Bolts!
      • WHAT?!
    • Hmm, this happened the last time as well... Very well, I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE YOU SPOONY BARD!
  • What's Chief O'Hara up to?Sean Murray I
    • Ooh, I love that show! It takes camp up to eleven!
  • The faeries have stolen your gum. - StolenByFaeries
  • Why hello there, thou of the Nice Hat-wearing avatars...and "have at me", hmm? I accept your challenge, and let's dance. (brandishes fencing sabre)
  • I thought I should write on your new page. I like the name username. I'll miss calling you Riff. I never did get that you were making a joke about Rifftrax by calling yourself Rifflet. - Gentlemanorcus
    • Aw, thanks Orcus! You can still call me Riff if you want, I don't mind. I've been called worse in my time.
  • You, ma'am, are the crazy claymore-flinging Scot, and we are all honored to have you. ~ betterthanstrawberry
  • Dang it, I have to vandalize this page again?!?! When will this war end? ~ SpookyMask
  • To the snarkiest Scot I know, YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE! When your citrus apocalypse comes, you'd better not come after me or so help me God I'll...scream for help louder. Yes. You heard me. ~Al Ciao
  • Curses, you're hilariously adorable! Your signature is adorably hilarious! Hauu~ Omochikaeriiii... H-HAUU~! OMOCHIKAERIIII~ .*Grabs the Gumchewer* LET RENA TAKE YOU BACK HOME TO EAGLELAND. IT'LL HE FUN. HAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUU~
  • Cough* Anyway. Hai,Gumchewer Girl! Rena says hi! You're special, kid! Take this! -RenaTheArchmage
  • You don't know me, I don't know you, and I'm saying hi anyway. Hi. :D Raineh Daze
  • Huh. Never been here. Might as well get out my song sheet... let's see... AHA!
This song is for Gummie,
That one girl who's pretty funny,
(Or is that pretty and funny?)
I dunno, honey,
Give me more of them laughs,
Off-the-wall, likes shopping malls,
A chirpy, happy kinda chick,
Better not annoy her, she could be a...
bit of a handful, I guess,
I would continue about her awesomeness, but you know the rest\\ - @\Inhopelessguy. Dude, you just got Songed.

  • I, Rena "the Archmage" Maria, do hereby declare this territory to be under my control, as my headquarters. From now on, I shall be assuming command of all supplies, personnel, and operations of this place, as the Supreme Archmagus of She Who Chew's Gum's Troper Page. All who resist me shall be swiftly and mercilessly executed by myself immediately. It is, therefore, in your best interest to simply surrender, and to allow yourself to be absorbed into my ranks.

Worry not, I am a fair ruler. I will be generous, and allow you to keep 3% of everything you own, instead of the 1% I had initially planned.

Have a nice life,
-Your new dictator

  • HAPPY BELATED FIFTEENTH BIRTHDAY! Enjoy it while you can. Before you know it, you'll be old and feeble and have no choice but to resort to a demonic pact for immortality... Actually, given that you can probably scare demons into submission, that won't be a bad thing for you. Carry on. ~Al Ciao

  • Dear gods, did I really post that Higurashi stuffs? Talk about Old Shame...

Anyway. I have a question. Is Scotland really a land of constant awesomeness, or am I misinformed?


  • Hmm, I haven't lived anywhere else, so I don't have anything to compare it too. But I ddo have a neat fact. Did you know that Scotland is the most obese place in Europe?.. Just imagine how fat everyone would be without the heroin!

  • Clearly, they mistake obesity for amazing badassery. When your life consists of taking the everything of your enemies, eating live sheep in one bite, and building giant castles for the sake of badassery and bagpipes, you're bound to get a little pudgy.

Wait. Heroin? Is that your secret to success? Get me some, dammit! -RenaTheArchmage, who really shouldn't be posting right now.