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Do you have a friend who won't stop talking? A child who won't stop crying? An embarrassing parent who won't stop talking about how cute you were as a child?

Wouldn't your life be so much better if that person were making music instead of speech? Look like you need the iSophagus!

Simply cram the iSophagus down someone's throat, and all that chatter disappears, and is replaced with sweet, glorious music! The air that should go through your vocal cords also goes through the iSophagus like air through a woodwind instrument or a brass instrument (percussion iSophagi are currently under construction)! Within 2 - 6 hours, the iSophagus comes back out their throat without any necessary puking or spitting.

Warning: the iSophagus can only be expelled through the throat. Do not attempt to make it go through the rest of the digestive system. See a doctor if it does not come out within 6 hours.

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