Has your Red Shirt Army been cut to shreds by uncaring heroes? Are the Mooks, Goons and Minions at your disposal incapable of providing more than half a second worth of challenge to the hero? Well worry no more! Because we at EvilTemp© have just the thing!
New and improved Elite Mooks! Now with twice the hero-removing power as regular Mooks! They're the same size as regular Mooks but with the fighting power of Giant Mooks and the coolness of an Evil Makeover!
We can accommodate all budgets and tastes, so all Elite Mooks can be customized and upgraded from base mooks to suit your needs. From simple cosmetic changes like a Palette Swap to adding Spikes of Villainy, and tangible changes like a raised Power Level and New Powers as the Plot Demands to match those pesky Level Grinding heroes. If you already have normal mooks, you can promote them to Elite Mook squads via upgrading them with Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot oil, letting them serve as Goddamned Bats or Demonic Spiders.
Elite Mooks are not to be confused with the generally solitary Giant Mook or Heavily Armored Mook each sold separately. If you want to order something more Mechanical in nature, see our Mechanical Monster wares. And if you want something with half the price but twice the stench, choose our Elite Zombie model. We also have bulk discounts available if you wish to outfit your entire organization.
If your mooks are still inadequate, feel free to invest in some Psycho Serum and upgrade them further to Superpowered Mooks, or go for some Kung Fu Proofing. Alternately, go for prime quality, and hire yourself your own, hand-picked Praetorian Guard!
Call now! Don't delay! With your purchase of 50 or more Elite Mooks EvilTemp© will provide a complimentary coffee mug (Best Evil Overlord)!