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Tear Jerker / The Cinema Snob

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Spoilers Off applies to all Tear Jerker pages, so all spoilers are unmarked. You Have Been Warned!


  • "There's no such thing as happy dreams, right? Everyone has nightmares every night like me? Please tell me I'm normal." Yep, you now want to hug a short, bearded, jackass film snob.
  • The Cinema Bum. Despite being used for a brief sketch, Brad's performance of him as a desperate vagrant lamenting his life is really convincing, and you just can't help but feel sorry for the poor bastard whenever you see him. Somebody buy that man a sandwich, please. Unfortunately, as of the Plutonium Baby review, he's most likely dead from the freezing weather outside.
    • He came back in the review of The Legend of Boggy Creek, only to be brutally murdered by Travis Crabtree, who had been sent into a mindless killing spree by his titular song. Doubles as Nightmare Fuel.
      • In the review for Return to Boggy Creek, Brad plays the footage again and notes that Cinema Bum survived the vicious attack, though he was "nearly" killed.
  • A minor example, but one that does stick-out nonetheless. At the end of his Sleepaway Camp III review, after finding out that the girlfriend of a Meet Cute couple already has a boyfriend, the look of betrayal is painfully clear on Brad's face, even if it was merely meant for a joke (especially painful since he had rooted for the couple to survive throughout the entire movie).
  • During the Snob's review of Miami Connection, Snob remembers that they used to have a guy for these kinds of movies. Cut to Kung Tai Ted paralyzed in a wheelchair in the corner.
    Snob: "Well, THAT was sad..."

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