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Sorting Algorithm Of Deadness / Tabletop Games

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Sorting Algorithm of Deadness

Using the scientifically Infallible power of the Sorting Algorithm of Deadness, who do you think is the next in line for being brought back from the great Bus in the sky?

To use the Algorithm, simply add the Column's "Death Value", and divide by the number of applicable rows.

Relative deadness factor Deader Than Dead Maybe Back Later Be Back Soon Death? What's That?
Death Value 4 3 2 1
Cause of death Irony, Bridge Drop, Overkill, Stuffed in the Fridge, Ret-Gone Redemption, Sacrifice, Bus Crash, Mortal Wound Reveal No One Could Survive That!, just plain killed in battle Jumping
Audience Expectation Anyone Can Die, Kill 'Em All Killed Off for Real, Tonight, Someone Dies Disney Death Back from the Dead, Death Is Cheap, Nobody Can Die
Body Found? Dead and Buried
Only Bits And Pieces
At The Morgue Never Found, Frozen, Petrified Left for Dead
Reaction Montage, Bond One-Liner He's Dead, Jim It's Personal Faux Death
Last Words Crap, Killed Mid-Sentence, Carry on men, His Name Is... Catch Phrase, Famous Last Words, Final Speech, Obi-Wan Moment "Fly, you fools!" "Piece of cake" "My Death Is Just the Beginning"
Characterization Red Shirt, Loved One, Mauve Shirt Recurring Character, C-List Fodder Regular Protagonist, Archvillain
When did they die? 10+ years ago, Series Finale 5-10 years ago Same year Same arc
"Died" and come back? Not yet Died once, but got better Twice I've lost count

If the character hasn't died yet (but seems likely to), see Sorting Algorithm of Mortality. All of this is trumped by the First Law of Resurrection.

Currently, The real Caulder from Advance Wars: Days of Ruin and Teri Bauer from 24 are the only characters to have scored 4, the highest possible. And are notable for having 4 in every category. At one point, Shirley from Code Geass and also scored 4, thanks in part to a special CLAMP bonus that became harder to defend as the series went on. Chloe Sullivan from Smallville is currently the only character to have scored a perfect 1, in the episode Fracture, with the rest of the cast not even taking her death seriously, fully expecting her return.

Baseline Example: The death of Superman.

  • Cause: Heroic Sacrifice, so he's not coming back from that too quickly, or the sacrifice will be cheapened. 3.
  • Advertisement:
  • Genre: It's a comic book, so Death Is Cheap. 1.
  • The Body: Deader Than Dead, a Pietà Plagiarism too for supes sake! So no chance of Faking the Dead. 4.
  • Reaction: Really Dead Montage, uh-oh. 4.
  • Characterization: Protagonist. 1.
  • When did he die: Same year, so 2.
  • Come Back?: This was a first, so 4.
  • Average: So add it up... we get a pretty high score, 19! Since it's not a videogame, divide by 7, and we get... 19/7 = 2.7, meaning supes isn't coming back for at least a few months, maybe even years. In actuality the Death Of Superman happened in January 1993 and he came back some time before May 1994.

Now let's make a prediction with the recent death of Batman in Final Crisis.

  • Cause: Heroic Sacrifice, give or take. 3.
  • Genre: Comic book, so Death Is Cheap. 1.
  • The Body: Dead and buried, but it's a little more complicated. Still, it's a 4.
  • Advertisement:
  • Reaction: He's Dead Clark, plus "Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?" probably counts as a Really Dead Montage. 3.5.
  • Last Words: "Try Me." 3.
  • Characterization: It's The Goddamn Batman, people. 1.
  • When did he die: Same year, so 2.
  • Come Back?: This would be the first time, so 4.
  • Average: 21.5/8= 2.7. A semi-high score, and DC seems to be sticking to this one for a while. Still, he'll definitely be back, likely before the end of 2010 at the latest.[[supersecretspoiler: CORRECT!]]

Note: This sub-page is for Tabletop Games examples only. Please ensure that you put new examples in the correct Sorting Algorithm of Deadness sub-page.

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    Warhammer 40 000 

Let's analyse the God-Emperor of Mankind from the Imperium's standpoint, shall we? (If anyone feels differently, feel free to correct).

  • Cause of death? Death by irony - killed by Horus, his most trusted son/clone. 4
  • Genre? Anyone can die. 4
  • Body found? Stuck on the Golden Throne. 4
  • Reaction? Well, considering how the Eccelsiarch preaches about him, this would substitue nicely as a Really Dead Montage. 4
  • Last Words? None recorded. 4
  • Characterisation? From the Imperium's point of view, a loved one. 4
  • When did he die? Several millenias ago. 4
  • Back from the dead? Well, let's be kind on techinicality and count being comatose and stuck on a chair as being 'back' from the dead. 3
  • Algorithim result: 3.875. That Star Child legend had better be true, or humanity is screwed...

Now Let's do Leman Russ, missing Primarch of the Space Wolves. (This is done to evaluate the likeliness of him being dead).

  • Cause of Death: Just missing, so...yea. N/A
  • Genre: Anyone can die. 4
  • Body: If he is dead, it still has not been found. 3
  • Reaction: No body, no reaction to speak of. N/A
  • Last Words: gave a great speech before his departure. 1
  • Characterisation: Father of Space Wolves. 4
  • When: Several Millenias ago (again). 4
  • Back from the dead: N/A
  • Algorithim score: 3.2 recurring. Slightly better than The Emperor, but still...

And, just for fun, let's try Ciaphas Cain, HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!

  • Cause of Death: Died of old age after 200+ years of service. For Cain, that's irony. 4
  • Genre: Anyone can die. 4
  • Body: Buried with full military honors. 4
  • Reaction: Hard to say. On the one hand, there's that military funeral. However, the Imperium seems to be treating it as a Faux Death. So... 2.5?
  • Last Words: N/A
  • Characterization: Protagonist of seven books and counting. 1
  • When: At least several years before the "Cain Archive" was released. 3
  • Back from the dead: After his first few disappearances, the Imperium just gave up and decided to leave him on the active duty roster. Forever. 1
Algorithm score: 3.083 recurring. Not good odds, but I'd bet on him before the Emperor.

And yet another Primarch, Vulkan this time, analyzed because his fate after Drop Site Massacre is a mess. Feel free to correct this as Horus Heresy updates show up.

  • Cause of Death: Last known, pierced with the ultimate No One Could Survive That! weapon, fulgurite, in battle, meeting both quotas of 2.
  • Genre: Anyone can die. 4
  • Body: Found, but then lost. Currently missing. 2
  • Reaction: His troops and brothers were shocked, but the latter didn't believe it and the former adopted "Vulkan lives" as their survival mantra. 1.5?
  • Last Words: N/A
  • Characterization: Recurring in Horus Heresy, but only Shrouded in Myth in main 'verse. 3.5
  • When: Like Leman, several millennias ago. 4
  • Back from the dead: His shtick as a Perpetual. He did it several times just in Vulkan Lives. 1
Algorithm score: 2.571. Of everyone thus far, he's the most likely to return in foreseeable future.

Another Primarch, because analyzing stuff is fun. This time - Roboute Guilliman, Primarch of the Ultramarines, who's not dead as much as stuck in stopped-time field seconds before death.

  • Cause of Death: Nearly got himself beheaded by his own brother, a perfectionist like him. Combining irony and death in battle, that gives... 3?
  • Genre: Take a guess. 4
  • Body: Found, on display on Ultramar. 4
  • Reaction: Empire flat out worships him, with millions of pilgrims visiting his temple every month, so probably Meaningful Funeral. 4
  • Last Words: Left behind a Big Book of War, which should count as Final Speech. 3
  • Characterization: Regular in Horus Heresy, often mentioned in current-day Imperium. 2.5
  • When: Yet again, several millenias ago. 4
  • Back from the dead: Once survived being in space for a few hours. 3
Algorithm score: 3,313. Only Emperor has a worse score, so Guilliman's return ain't very likely.


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