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Series / Keen Eddie

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"I'm Eddie. How do you like me so far?"

"Even in darkness, a keen spirit discovers light."
— Eddie's fortune.

Keen Eddie was a short-lived Cop Show from the early noughties starring Mark Valley, Sienna Miller and Julian Rhind Tutt.

Eddie Arlette, a detective from Manhattan, is taken in when he develops feelings for a duplicitous informant. She and a peculiar chemist trick him into planning a drug-bust for the wrong warehouse, and as a result of his mistake, inadvertently supplies London's drug lords with a year's worth of oxycodone. But Eddie's the only one who can ID the chemist, so he's forced to follow them off to merry old England and atone for the mess he made. He arrives to discover that Fiona Bickerton, the beautiful but prickly daughter of the people he's subletting his flat from, is still living there while she's supposed to be at university, and due to their circumstances, the two become unwilling roommates.

Fiona despises Eddie, and that seems to be a sentiment shared by the rest of London, give or take, including the criminal element and the Metropolitan Police Department (Scotland Yard). Eddie's boss, superintendent Nathaniel Johnson, is a stoic hardass with an over-developed ambition for career advancement, who doesn't seem amused by Eddie's American ways. Even Eddie's dog, Pete, bites him regularly. About the only person in town who doesn't want Eddie's head on a plate is his partner, Inspector Monty Pippin, a deceptively spiffy mod with a wild private life. He makes Eddie seem like a prude in comparison and has little interest in controlling himself, but Eddie sees the good in him, and they still manage to get along fine. Together they take down the oxycodone ring and manage to do a lonely man a good turn.

Somewhere between Moonlighting and Starsky & Hutch in tone, this isn't exactly a Fish out of Water show so much as a crime-fighting situation. In the first few episodes, the show tends to be more in the Guy Ritchie line than anything else, with blingy editing, techno music, outlandish fight scenes, glamor and sex-appeal riding the surface, desperately trying to look cool. But beneath all the flash is a story about a man who clings to his belief in humanity and gravitates toward lost souls, risking life and limb to bring them back from the edge. He does everything he can to help people — not just the victims of crime, but criminals as well. Even his friends aren't safe from the Care-Bear Stare that is Eddie Arlette. All of this becomes obvious within a few episodes, but by the time the show hit its stride, it was too late. Only thirteen episodes were made and, due to being yanked around the schedule and buried, only a handful aired on FOX before it was unceremoniously canceled. Many people who saw the show caught it on the Bravo airings. It was last seen on the "Sleuth" channel.

The last few episodes of Keen Eddie make the relationship arcs apparent and give the viewer an idea of what they could have expected in the second season: Eddie's only mechanism for coping with change is to force his surroundings to adapt to him, but London actually seems to be warming to the idea. His dog still bites him, though.

Keen Eddie provides examples of:

  • Adrenaline Time
  • Adventure Duo: Eddie and Monty
  • Agent Peacock: Monty.
  • Assimilation Academy: Ollerton, Monty's alma mater, seems to be a Boarding School of Horrors complete with a Dean Bitterman-style Headmaster and evil alums. Given their connections, they assume they are above the law and let the new student Initiation Ceremony in their most elite house become extremely dangerous, all the while pressuring victims to keep quiet. They even try to scare Monty into hushing everything up by not only threatening him, but his brother and mother as well. Their school motto is "Audi, Vide, Tace".
  • Aw, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: Several times with Eddie and Fiona, and on occasion Eddie and Monty. Once with Eddie and Nathaniel.
  • Being Good Sucks: Eddie sometimes mopes over how much his life sucks compared to Monty's.
  • Belligerent Sexual Tension: "I! Hate! You!"
  • Brief Accent Imitation: Monty and Fiona both do (terrible) imitations of Eddie's American accent when they're really annoyed with him.
  • Catchphrase: "I'm Eddie. How do you like me so far?" There's also Nigel's tiny bladder mantra. ("Loo!") and Monty's affinity for the word "dude".
  • Dramedy
  • Cultured Badass: Nathaniel Johnson, who's as posh as prince. He isn't given many chances to prove his badass side, but when he does, it is truly impressive.
  • Da Chief: An impressively suave example.
  • Deadpan Snarker: Everyone, but especially Nathaniel.
  • Defrosting Ice Queen: The last episode holds out hope for some closure to Eddie and Fiona.
  • Determinator: Cecil Barrett, who Monty describes as a cruise missile personified.
  • The Dulcinea Effect: Eddie is prone to this, it's what screws him in the first episode (mistaking a bad girl for a damsel), and it's what draws him into a the case in the last episode (following a lady in need into a case so dangerous, no other cop will touch it). Eddie admits his reasons for being prone to this in the first episode: he needs to be needed.
  • Even the Guys Want Him: Eddie
  • Friendship Moment: Eddie gets a couple of these in the last episode, as it's seems clear to Nathaniel and Monty that he's about to get himself killed.
  • The Fatalist: Anton Levy — he turns out to be right.
  • Freudian Slip: Three good ones, including Fiona telling Eddie the secret ingredient in the soup she made him was "Love," Eddie accidentally calling Carol "Ms. Hornypenny," and Monty telling Eddie "I love you," instead of "I'll leave you."
  • Gay Bravado: Monty to Eddie a few times, and Eddie to Monty once.
  • Good Cop/Bad Cop: Done to Jimmy Fishkin by the cops and his criminal bosses.
  • Hates Being Alone: Fiona — it's implied she's only engaged to Nigel because of this.
  • Heterosexual Life-Partners: Eddie and Monty, who — According to Mark Valley — spend so much time together, it starts to confuse them. Monty is usually quick to vocalize said confusion.
  • I Need to Go Iron My Dog: Monty tends to pull this as a means of escape when Eddie and Nathaniel are fighting, but is usually thwarted when one of them makes him stay.
  • Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain: Rudy, a failed actor turned crook, who helped deceive Eddie about the drug bust in the first episode. Once he's back in London, he fails repeatedly to keep Eddie off his back. When he's finally caught in the end, we find out why he's working with the drug-runners in the first place. He needed money to take his late wife's body back to her home to be buried.
  • Insistent Terminology: The forty year-old dirty slut, who will do anything... for money!
    • "A blood feud."
  • Interspecies Romance: Eddie's dog, Pete. Well, sort of:
    Fiona: "Your dog is using my cat as a shag toy!"
    • Anything That Moves: Although the moving part isn't a requirement. Pete's seen "dating" Fiona's fur coat.
  • The Lancer: Despite being the star of the show, Eddie is Nathaniel's Lancer. He's the only officer at the MET who has the balls to stand up to Nathaniel and challenge his detached, unsympathetic, "appearances are everything" approach to crime-fighting. It's possible that's why Nathaniel has him around. But if Eddie were the leader of his division, Monty would be Eddie's lancer.
  • Loveable Sex Maniac: We get hints of this from Monty when he starts chatting about his esteem for porn (internet porn, 70s porn, etc.) Given some of his behavior, though, he's edging toward Anything That Moves.
  • Meaningful Echo: "What is wrong? Nothing."
  • Mistaken for Gay: Nathaniel by Eddie, Eddie and Monty by a random hobo.
    • Also Johnny Red by Yellow in "Horse Heir"
  • Moe Couplet: Eddie and Monty. Usually, Eddie is judgmental and non-social, and Monty is selfish and craven, but Eddie's influence often causes Monty to behave in a more heroic manner, while Eddie's loftiness is undermined by his affection for Monty. They're effortlessly sincere with each other and very dynamic as a team, and seem to be the opposite when apart.
  • Not Himself: "Citizen Cecil" mostly takes place during a full moon, and as a result, several characters aren't themselves. The usually bickering Eddie and Fiona are nice to each other, Pete and Duchess (a dog and cat) get along, normally smooth Nathaniel loses control of his command center/office, and Audrey, Monty's friend-with-benefits/partner in crime, suddenly wants to get serious.
  • Odd Friendship: Eddie and Monty.
  • Ooh, Me Accent's Slipping: Monty pretends to be Eddie when he goes to a support group for sex addicts. Later, when his ruse begins to slip, he accent does, too.
  • Pet the Dog: Criminals regularly have these moments on Keen Eddie. As does Nathaniel, despite already being a good guy.
  • The Pornomancer: Monty, by way of the shotgun effect.
  • "Psycho" Strings: In "Citizen Cecil," when Eddie and Fiona are being really nice to each other.
  • Red Oni, Blue Oni: Eddie is a brash, rough-and-tumble New Yorker who has no trouble expressing himself and isn't afraid to challenge powerful, dangerous people in his pursuit of justice. He's genuinely confused by Monty, who he finds difficult to figure out. Monty's far more aloof, timid, docile and wisely duplicitous, and sticks to social expectations like glue. He also happens to be fond of natty blue suits.
    • Interestingly, this is really only true of Eddie and Monty in the workplace. In their private lives, Monty is more forward, wild, and instinctual, while Eddie is more thoughtful, disciplined, and given to navel-gazing.
  • Rich Bitch: Fiona, at least with people who get on her nerves.
  • Running Gag: There are several, one being Eddie's fantasies about Carol coming on to him, which he assumes are really happening. Usually results in him mentally checking out until Monty snaps him out of it.
    • A more subtle running gag happens several times when Nathaniel insults Eddie. Eddie gets Nathaniel back, but his insults usually go too far and are always completely serious. Nathaniel tends to take this in his stride, but Monty — who's more-or-less terrified of Nathaniel — has a silent meltdown.
    • There's a few from "Horse Heir": The euphemisms used by anyone attempting to describe the "event" surrounding the extraction of a racehorse's seed, and the reaction people have to the manual's instructions on how to do it being "unnatural" followed by someone pointing out that the manual says otherwise.
    • The constant drop-of-a-hat fistfights of One-Ball Bill and Johnny Red
  • Sad Clown: Monty. He even admits as much in the last episode, during a rare and brief moment of sincerity.
  • Schedule Fanatic: Nathaniel.
  • Sexual Karma: In "Sticky Fingers," Monty pretended to be Eddie to seduce The Lady of the Lift. When she finds out he's lying, she rejects him, only to end up in an elevator with Eddie. Fiona predicted something along these lines would happen because of karma.
  • Ship Tease: Ever so much. Most of the main characters and a ton of recurring characters have had romantic moments with Eddie, but it's made pretty clear who he's destined to end up with.
  • Slave to PR: Nathaniel, who seems to care more about career advancement than crime fighting.
  • Sleep Cute: Eddie and Monty
  • Stupid Sexy Flanders: Almost everyone is impressed with Eddie, but Monty kinda takes it to the next level:
    Monty: (on being around when Eddie pisses off Nathaniel) "It kind of scares me, but I like it at the same time.... It's what I'm looking for in a relationship.... Oh, my god. I think I'm attracted to you."
    Eddie: "Shut. Up."
    Monty: "No, this is strange. 'Cause I normally prefer brunets."
  • Tropaholics Anonymous: Eddie sends Monty to "Emotional Connections," a sex-a-holics group.
  • Tsundere: Fiona
  • Violent Glaswegian: publican Johnny Red, co-owner of the Sticky Wicket Pub in "Horse Heir" and "Sticky Fingers," who is blood-feuding with his brother-in-law One Ball Bill
    • It's possible that Cecil Barrett from "Citizen Cecil" falls into this, given how he sounds Scottish
  • Weak-Willed: Monty. He gives in to vices, lies almost compulsively, let's himself be bullied into "playing ball" and is quick to believe in things like astrology and fate.
  • Well, Excuse Me, Princess!: Eddie and Fiona
  • You Watch Too Much X: Eddie's co-workers watch so much American cop shows/movies, they think Eddie's going to beat up a suspect. Although he did kick a suspect in the groin for no reason in the very first episode.