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Self Demonstrating / "The Reason You Suck" Speech

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Oh... It's you. Want to learn about yet another trope? Figures. It's about the only thing this miserable website is good for. What do you want to learn about THIS time? "The Reason You Suck" Speech? Simple! It's a SPEECH... That lists the various REASONS... That YOU SUCK! Goodbye!

What? You want examples? You... Hehehe... You want examples of such a speech? I have the PERFECT example! YOU SUCK! I am SICK and TIRED of seeing your pathetic, ugly mug around here! How long do you think you've been on here? Hours? Days? Weeks? Months, even? You could be doing ANYTHING else with your time! Being with your friends and family, bettering yourself with ACTUAL pursuits, working hard at your job, that you've probably never even gotten in the first place, because you couldn't be bothered to move your fat ass out of that chair! But no! Learning about why that one scene in Some Like It Hot seems so similar to that scene in Inception was OBVIOUSLY so much more important! You're really living life to the fullest, buddy!

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So enjoy wasting what's left of your time on this Earth soaking up meaningless writing tropes! If this blistering tangent about why you're such a failure didn't get you to finally leave and make something of yourself, CLEARLY you never had much of a life to begin with! Welcome to your new home! You're going to spend the rest of your days here! I mean, you CAN go whenever you want, but we both know that's not happening! When you finally die reading one of these articles, nobody will even know you died, and hardly anyone will miss you.

You wanna read the page for Frasier for the nineteenth time?

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