First Aired - 12/15/1996
After stealing Superintendent Chalmers' car emblem off his new Honda Accord, Nelson is sentenced to janitorial work. While Lisa is serving detention for snickering at Nelson spraying Groundskeeper Willie with a hose, she becomes fascinated with and develops a crush on the bully. Meanwhile, Homer takes an autodialer that was recently used in a telemarketing scam and creates a telemarketing scam of his own.
- 555: This occurs when Homer demonstrates the autodialer for Marge.
- Absentee Actor: Maggie does not appear in this episode.
- Actually Pretty Funny:Skinner: I'll tell you something that's not so funny. Right now, Superintendant Chalmers is at home crying like a little girl. (Among the subsequent laughter of the students, he chuckles.) I guess it is a little funny.
- Later, Lisa is amused by how Nelson keeps pranking Willie.
- All Girls Want Bad Boys: Explored in this episode, with Lisa coming to the conclusion that what she had with Nelson was an infatuation, and that it would never work out, no matter how much she tries to change him.
- All Love Is Unrequited: Poor Milhouse
- A Lesson Learned Too Well: Homer pays his debt to society from his telemarketing scam... with another telemarketing scam."Hello, this is Homer Simpson, a.k.a. Happy Dude. The court has ordered me to call every person in town to apologize for my telemarketing scam. I'm sorry. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me, send one dollar to Sorry Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. You have the power."
- Ambulance Cut: Milhouse passes Lisa's note to Nelson, and when he reads it and looks back, Milhouse waffles his eyebrows. Cut to paramedics wheeling an unconscious Milhouse into an ambulance.
- A Rare Sentence: When Bart finds out that Lisa has invited Nelson over to their house as a friend.Bart: I'll probably never say this to you again, but... you can do better!
- A Riddle Wrapped in a Mystery Inside an Enigma: Lisa describes Nelson as "like a riddle wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a vest".
- The Artifact: When Marge is driving Lisa home, she occasionally squints out the window, the remnant of a deleted scene where she turns out to have night blindness, bad enough she can't tell whether she's on the road or not.
- Bad Cop/Incompetent Cop: Chief Wiggum and his handling of the telemarketing fraud perpetuated by Jimmy the Scumbag ... and later Homer Simpson.
- Bait-and-Switch: It appears Chief Wiggum has tracked down Nelson and shot him ("Chief, no!"), but it turns out he was actually taking out Homer's autodialer, and Wiggum has no idea where Nelson is.
- When Milhouse is carted off to the hospital, one of the paramedics tells Lisa, "[Milhouse] can't hear you now..." making viewers think Milhouse died, before adding, "We had to pack his ears with gauze."
- Bee Afraid: Punished with working for Willie, Nelson sticks a rake into bee's nest.Nelson: Hey, Willie, catch the football. [flings it at him]
Willie: All right, I'll—AHHHHH!
- Big "NO!": Skinner's reaction to Nelson's Noodle Incident listed below.
- Big "SHUT UP!": Homer to Ned and Maude.
- Detention Episode: Lisa gets detention when Mr. Largo thought that she was disrupting class by laughing at the word "tromboner". What Lisa was really laughing at was Nelson spraying Groundskeeper Willie with a hose and misunderstanding what he was saying.
- Driven to Suicide: Arresting Jimmy the scumbag, Wiggum describes all the other things he'll endure in prison and say this is the only way out.
- First Kiss: Nelson's "Shut Up" Kiss turns out to be this for Lisa.
- Gilligan Cut: After Nelson receives a love note from Lisa and initially thinks Millhouse wrote it. Cut immediately to an unconscious Millhouse being carried out of the school on a stretcher, having been badly beaten up by Nelson.
- Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Of a sorts. When Principal Skinner punches the wall after thinking Superintendent Chalmers' hood ornament was gone for good, he starts with a colorful metaphor and ends with its kid-friendly counterpart.Principal Skinner: Damn! Dang! Darn!
- Hypocritical Humor: Homer's autodialer keeps calling the Flanders house, which infuriates Maude since Ned won't just unplug the phone.Maude: That is it, Ned! If you don't unplug that phone right now, you're sleeping on the lawn!
Homer: WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?! PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO SLEEP!
- I Can Change My Beloved: Discussed; played straight with Marge and Homer (Marge insists that she has changed Homer, despite the evidence that he's still an often-inconsiderate slob) and averted with Lisa and Nelson (Lisa comes to realize that she could never change Nelson).
- Karma Houdini: Despite beating Milhouse to the point he needs to be sent to an emergency clinic, Nelson is shown walking off scot free straight after with no implied punishment.
- Nelson's punishment for stealing Chalmers H is more of a punishment for Willie.
- Lead In: Homer's subplot begins with him attempting to shoplift by trying to disguise candy as sprinkles on a self-serve donut.
- Mocking Sing-Song: After Lisa is caught looking at Nelson during music class.Class: [sing-song] Lisa likes Nelson!
Milhouse: She does not!
Class: [sing-song] Milhouse likes Lisa!
Janey: He does not!
Class: [sing-song] Janey likes Milhouse!
Uter: She does not!
Class: [sing-song] Uter likes Milhouse.
Mr. Largo: Nobody likes Milhouse! Lisa, you've got detention!
- Noodle Incident: Who knows what Nelson left in the bird bath after the attack on Skinner at his home?
- Knowing Nelson, he probably used it as a toilet.
- Not Me This Time: Skinner's search for the H from Chalmers' Honda naturally begins with Bart.
- Pet the Dog: Nelson actually does help Lisa with the line's punishment.
- The Precious, Precious Car: Chalmers is quite proud of his 1979 Honda. Pity Nelson vandalizes it by stealing the H.Chalmers: What's the point of having a Honda if you can't show it off?
- Really 17 Years Old: Kearney yelling at Superintendent Chalmers and Principal Skinner to get away from his car (in yet another example of Kearney being older than he looks)
- Shout-Out: The title refers to Back to the Future, when George McFly introduces himself to Lorraine Baines as "[her] density", fixing it to "destiny".
- "Shut Up" Kiss: Nelson gives Lisa one, and ends up liking it.
- Spit Take: Lisa confesses to Milhouse that she has a crush, leading Milhouse to drink milk suavely before she finishes, "...on Nelson." Milhouse proceeds to spit milk back into the carton, ruining it with force.Nelson: Way to drink, poindexter!
- Tempting Fate: Defied when Skinner gets hit in the face with a dozen eggs after looking in Bart's locker."Rather than tempt fate, I'll just move along."
- Unusually Uninteresting Sight: Homer doesn't seem at all amazed or shocked when the auto dialer starts rolling out the door, just angry that it's trying to leave.
- You Wouldn't Hit a Guy with Glasses?: Oh yes, Nelson would ... after he gets a note from Millhouse (who is acting as a go-between to deliver Lisa's note to the bully) proclaiming love for him. Nelson gets the wrong idea and we see the outcome in a Gilligan Cut.