"Wait, you made a bet with Aunt Arcuied? Over what?"
"That our family could throw a Christmas party that would make even your father and that husband of hers forget the fact that they want to kill each other" Altrouge answered confidently...
..."we will make this party happen. It will be spectacular, and imouto will owe me an entire candy store worth of goodies"
- Main Character: The Entire Clan, but specifically the Fellowship of the Sane
- Crossover: Far too many to list.
- Synopsis: Altrouge Brunestud-Emiya has decided to host this year's Christmas party, and invites everyone. Even that other clan, the Tohnos. Why? Because she wants to show up her sister Arcueid (and win a candy bet). And also to get Shirou and Shiki to stop trying to stab each other to death every time either man is within a hundred meters of the other. Meanwhile, four heroes (really, four people who don't want to drown in the inevitably-oncoming onslaught of insanity) try to break free of the trap.
Hilarity Ensues Serial Escalation, because Rule of Funny. Attempting to take this fic seriously will make Your Head A-Splode.
- Chapter 1 can be found here
- Chapter 2 can be found here
- Chapter 3 can be found here
- Chapter 4 can be found here
- Chapter 5 can be found here
- Chapter 6 can be found here
- Chapter 7 can be found here
- Chapter 8 can be found here
- Chapter 9 can be found here
- Chapter 10 can be found here
- Chapter 11 can be found here
- Chapter 12 can be found here
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: Invoked when Keiko gets her hands on the God/Burning Gundam.
Keiko: "I AM AWESOME! I AM ALMIGHTY! I AM OMNIPOTENT! I AM GOING TO DESTROY CANADA!"
- All Just a Dream: You didn't really think that The Fellowship of the Sane was really going to escape did you?
- Awkward Mother-Daughter Bonding Activity: Sakura teaching Sakuya and Erika S&M play, Bazett and Ivone going Braveheart on the Bacon Crusaders, Touko and Souhiro experimenting on random guests...
- Bedmate Reveal: Happened to Kiri and Artemis after a night in Vegas. Immediately followed by...
- Butt-Monkey: Haru, Gilgamesh, Lancer, Archer, Shirou...
- The Cavalry Arrives Late: The Counter Guardian force arrives to find that they can't do anything but get sucked into the chaos.
- The police do show up, with Motoko Kusanagi at their helm, but the only thing they really manage to do is stop Miya from killing Tamaki.
- Church Militant: The crusaders of The Holy Empire of Bacannia embody this as a way of life.
- Cool vs. Awesome: Eggong Ragnaros versus Yarn Kraken with Keiko curbstomping them both with the Burning Gundam, Chuck Norris versus Santa Claus, George W. Bush versus Vladimir Putin.
- 11th-Hour Ranger: An old friend of both Shiki and Shirou, Chuck Norris shows up when everything's gone to Hell and offers to help fix it all. Apparently, even he can't overcome the insanity and ends up brawling with Santa Claus in Detroit.
- Failure Is the Only Option: Trying to get out. That certainly means that you can't try.
- Foe Yay: When everyone goes crazy, Rin and Luvia have sex.
- For Science!: Touko and Souhiro kidnap random guests to use in experiments.
- Game Show: Zelretch, Illya, Minaka, and Araya Souren pit Clan Emiya versus Clan Tohno in one of the most screwed up ones of all time.
- Go-Karting with Bowser: While everything is going straight to hell, Mikiya plays poker with Araya, Rock and Gendo Ikari, who dimension hopped to evade a party at NERV with the same level of insanity.
- Kill Sat: Zelretch has one in orbit. It functions as a railgun in the shape of a giant yellow smiley face.
- Man-Eating Plant: Kusano's garden is filled with them.
- Meanwhile Scene: Several. Mainly because there are so many people attending.
- Personality Swap: Due to a pranks gone wrong, many of the Clan's personality were reversed.
- Putting the Band Back Together: AU!Illya blackmails Eiko, DA!Haru, and BK!Kiri to form the !A Us. Subverted in that they weren't actually together to begin with, but all had played instruments at one point.
- The Reveal: Of Gil's girlfriend Caren Ortesia.
- Running Gag: A few.
- Gil quoting The Lord of the Rings.
- Shirou getting raped by his wives.
- Lancer getting summoned and killed off and summoned and killed off and summoned...
- The Crusade of the Holy Warriors of Bacannia.
- Reisbyfe being a flaming lesbian to everyone (with the obvious exception of her husband).
- Archer getting thrown into a wall.
- Santa Claus: Definitely not how the stories make him out to be. Oh, and stay away from the reindeer, they're carnivorous.
- Screw the Rules, I Make Them! : Alaya-ko takes advantage of all the chaos to come down and have some fun with Shirou.
- Serial Escalation: This story cranks the Clan's insanity level up indefinitely.
- She Is All Grown Up: Shirou gets this when he sees Alter!Illya for the first time. Subverted in that she's from a different reality...with highly disturbing implications.
- They Killed Kenny Again: Like most of the Nasuverse Lancer gets this shoved upon him for the duration of the game show. It gets to the point where Illya and Zelretch are summoning him just to see how many ways they can make him suffer.
- Thoroughly Mistaken Identity: Miya mistakes Tamaki for her son Takeshi even they look nothing alike. It's made worse by the fact that at that moment she's trying to kill Takeshi for having his first time with his ashikabi Haruhi Fujioka.
- Undesirable Prize: For Minaka at the end of the Game Show that is.
- A Wizard Did It: Played Straight and Lampshaded.
Shiki: "And how are we alive?"
Shiki: "Its sad that we can reasonably use that excuse these days