Airdate: Monday, January 22, 2007
Sender: Andy Hsiao, Taiwan
"Andy H-S-I-A-O and Sometimes Y" writes in to speculate on Strong Bad's age, saying "you really do look old".
Strong Bad calls in an "Emergency Marketing Meeting", calling together "the best, the brightest, the people I hate the least": The Cheat, Strong Mad, Bubs, and Marzipan (who's there for "legal reasons").
The Cheat suggests "Youth Through Editing", making Strong Bad Emails more exciting through use of "quick cuts, incessant music, and disorienting close-ups". Strong Bad is initially "on board" and "not bored", but he finds The Cheat's remixed version of Strong Bad checking Andy's email a bit overwhelming.
Bubs chimes in, saying "I've been noticing how kids love anything with a lowercase "i" in front of it," as seen with Homestar and Homsar eagerly waiting in line to pick up iTems from Bubs' Concession Stand. Strong Bad shoots that idea down, saying "We already tried that with lowercase 'e's back in the late '90s. We all know where that got us."
Marzipan has a few ideas to spruce up Strong Bad's look "and add hundreds to your resale value", but seems to be under the impression that they're trying to redecorate a yard. Strong Mad's suggestion that Strong Bad "WEAR A DIAPER!" isn't any better, being way younger than Strong Bad was aiming for.
Unimpressed with everyone else's ideas, Strong Bad decides it's time for "extreme measures, with Gene Hackman!" and opts for a "lace-lift". Unfortunately, Strong Bad has his laces pulled a little too tight, and his stretched facial features and mumbling, muted voice cause Strong Sad to mistake his brother for their great-grandmother.
Strong Sad: That's right! You eat everything through a tube! Well, let's get you back to the home.
Strong Bad: Wait! I'm a hip young person!
Strong Sad: Yes, I saw your new hip! It looks great! (starts leading the feebly protesting Strong Bad away) Why don't you tell me again about the time the Depression fought Abraham Lincoln naked in your front yard?
- Affirmative Action Girl: Parodied, when Strong Bad complains that Marzipan is at his emergency marketing meeting for "legal reasons".Marzipan: Word booty!
- Comically Missing the Point: Marzipan's spiel, where she treats Strong Bad's head like it was a plan of someone's yard.Strong Bad: Oh, this'll work great, Marizpan... If I was a backyard!!
- Cutaway Gag: After Strong Bad brings up trying to use "lowercase 'e's back in the late '90s" to look cool, it cuts to a warehouse full of crates of "eStrong Vague Online Investments", which doubles as a Take That! to the dot-com bubble. See also: iProduct.
- Gone Horribly Wrong: Strong Bad's "lace-lift", instead of making him look younger, makes him look older to the point that Strong Sad mistakes him for their great-grandmother.
- iProduct: Bubs remarks "kids love anything with a lowercase 'i' in front of it," and suggests re-branding as iStrong or iBad.Strong Bad: We already tried that with lowercase "e"s back in the late '90s. We all know where that got us.
- Multi-Take Cut: Wildly-changing cuts, zooms, and camera angles are heavily abused in the Cheat's attempt at "Youth Through Editing".
- My Friends... and Zoidberg: Or in this case, "the people I hate the least". And Marzipan.
- Shout-Out: Strong Bad declares it's time for "Extreme Measures, with Gene Hackman!"
- Speaking Like Totally Teen: Strong Bad says he needs an image that says "S'up my young parsons, I too am so on-the-go that I drink my yogurt from a tube."
- Younger and Hipper: Parodied in this e-mail, which is all about Strong Bad trying to brainstorm ways to "reconnect with the youth of today".