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Recap / Strong Bad Email E 84 Kids Book

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Airdate: Monday, September 8, 2003

Sender: Steve Buttz

Strong Bad: Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...a-da sbemail.

Steve "Never mind, I'm not even gonna touch that one" wants to know if Strong Bad has ever written a children's book, along with what it was about, and if Strong Bad tried to teach the kids any new words.

Strong Bad: Yeah, I wrote a children's book. Who hasn't? I mean, kids can barely read as it is so how hard can it be to write for them?
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Strong Bad shows off Everyone Is Different, which is clearly an old book on diversity by Lem Sportsinterviews that Strong Bad doodled over and defaced, turning what were once innocent pictures of different children at play into all sorts of random and deadly situations. Highlights include:

  • "Some people are about to be run over. Frankie has about five seconds."
  • "Some people are very tall and merciless. Quincy is destroying San Antonio."
  • "Some people wears glasses. Beth looks like a dude.
  • "Some people are squirrel-handed. Gregor is a weird name."
  • "Some people have braces. Some people have headgear. Fran could play linebacker for the Raiders."
  • "Some people have rigged the enemy base with explosives. Albert has."
  • "Some people have a Southern accent, and those are hot. Trisha is a severe hottie."
  • "Some people are being fangoriously devoured by a gelatinous monster. Hillary's legs are being digested."
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  • "Everyone is different. No two people are not on fire. Awww..."

Strong Bad: So there's my book. Pretty good, eh Steve? And the words that we taught the kids were, uh, "fangoriously", "gelatinous", and um... "linebacker". You know, education at its finest. Well, some people need to go get an ice cream sandwich. Strong Bad needs to go get an ice cream sandwich. (gets up and leaves)
(The Paper comes down)

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Tropes:


Strong Bad: (DVD version only) (reading an extra hidden page picturing Eh! Steve) Some people are named "Eh! Steve". Eh! Steve is not exactly a person.
The Wheelchair: (reading the now-defaced page, depicting itself preparing to ensnare Eh! Steve in a rope trap) Some people are talkin' wheelchairs. Eh! Steve will get what he deseeeerrrrrrves!
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