Airdate: Monday, May 2, 2005
Sender: Cat (yeah, that's my real name)
Strong Bad: (singing) Here comes another email that I'll answer for you! Here comes another email that I'll answer for you!
Cat ("And something I don't wanna read") thinks Strong Bad should hold a garage sale, thinking about all "da things" he could get with the extra money.
Strong Bad: What sort of 'da things' are we talking about here, Catman? "Da bomb" or, uh, "da boyz" or even, uh, "da hood"? I don't think I want any of dose.
Strong Bad's main problem with garage sales is that the merchandise gives the impression that people just gave up on putting their trash out and started putting price tags on everything instead.
Strong Bad: I mean, isn't it just a little bit suspicious that there's only a one-letter difference between "garage sale" and "gar-bahge sale?" Except, don't ever say "gar-bahge" like that. That's like, the only joke moms have, and they can keep it for all I care.
Strong Bad also has issues with the sort of people who get attracted to garage sales, including:
- The Haggler, like Bubs, who tries to talk Strong Bad down from a quarter to twenty cents for an old pantyhose doll.
- The Lurker, like Strong Sad, "the shady night-manager at Stuckey's type" who hangs out without buying anything (in Strong Sad's case because he's too weirded out by Senor Cardgage offering to go halfsies on a can of peas).
- Coach Z, whose weirdness (like "buying up all the 'Great for Baby' items" for reasons he'd "prefer that you didn't" ask about) is a class in of itself.
For all these reasons and more, Strong Bad argues that "wasting your Saturday morning just to sell $3.19 worth of trash" isn't the reason for a garage sale. Instead, he prefers to use said sales as a way to lure his neighbors out of their homes so The Cheat can ransack them, and then sell people their own stuff back a few weeks later at jacked-up prices... a ploy that backfires somewhat when Strong Bad tries to sell Marzipan a "new" answering machine.
Marzipan: Ooh, this is perfect! I've always wanted an answering machine.
Answering Machine: (in Marzipan's voice) It's a great day at Marzipan's! Please leave me a message.
Strong Bad: Uh, see, it is perfect! It already knows your name, even. Heh! Ooh, heh, eee, oh, hmm... peow! (runs off)
Marzipan: More like, pree-ow. (The Paper comes down.)
Tropes:
- Bait-and-Switch: The segment on "The Lurker" makes it look like Strong Bad is talking about Senor Cardgage, until at the last second it's revealed he was talking about Strong Sad.
- Buy or Get Lost: Strong Bad says that a Lurker, one of the types of people who frequent garage sales, stays around without buying anything. Apparently, said Lurker in this case is Strong Sad.Strong Sad: (about Senor Cardgage) Ugh! I feel like I need to take a chemical shower after talking to that guy! Do we have an emergency eyewash station?
Strong Bad: At least he bought something, lurker! Go back to Stuckey's. - Continuity Nod:
- Strong Bad's garage sale is loaded with items from previous emails and cartoons, including the Heavy Lourde, a copy of "Words I Probably Said", and some props from "3 Times Halloween Funjob". Most of the items' prices also refer to the number of the email they first showed up in.
- When The Cheat is ransacking Homestar's house, one of the items he tries to steal is Homestar's cow-lamp.
- Do You Want to Haggle?: According to Strong Bad, one of the types of people who frequent garage sales is the haggler. In this case, it's Bubs, who manages to talk Strong Bad down from a quarter to twenty-two-and-a-half cents for a pantyhose doll named Aunt Gert.
- Garage Sale: Strong Bad spends the e-mail mocking garage sales and the sort of weirdos who shop at them.
- Lame Pun Reaction: After making his "garage/garbage" joke, Strong Bad hastily adds "Don't ever say 'garbage' like that. That's like, the only joke moms have, and they can keep it for all I care." This is later revisited in an Easter egg.
- Mister Seahorse: Coach Z buying up all the "great for baby" items and proclaiming that he's okay to say a joke that Strong Bad says is "moms only" suggests that he at least thinks he's pregnant.
- Pretentious Pronunciation: Parodied; Strong Bad makes a joke that there's only a one-letter difference between a "garage sale" and a "garbage sale", which he pronounces as "gar-bahge" to rhyme with "garage". Then he adds "Don't ever say 'garbage' like that."
Homestar: (wearing a price tag that reads "SOLD") We got a Homestar Runner for sale! Slightly used and mostly confused. We can't give these things away! (leans) I'll take it! (leans the other way) I'll take twelve! (stands upright) Drive one home today!
(cut back to the blanket full of "Great for Baby" items)
Marzipan: This garage sale is more like a gar-bahge sale.
Strong Bad: Da-da-da-da-da! Moms! Only!
Coach Z: Oh, then I'M okay to say it!
(Marzipan and Strong Bad stare in shock and confusion at Coach Z.)
Strong Bad: Da-da-da-da-da! Moms! Only!
Coach Z: Oh, then I'M okay to say it!
(Marzipan and Strong Bad stare in shock and confusion at Coach Z.)
