Hey, the Matthew Broderick Story!
...and believe me, Death does not pony up for gas.
...and believe me, Death does not pony up for gas.
"That Abby. She's some gal!"
—Sam Casey
"I'm sending you the worst movie I know: it's called Riding with Death and it sucks on toast!"
—Mrs. Forrester
Film watched: Riding with Death, a TV movie compiled from two episodes of the television series Gemini Man.
The Segments
Prologue- Mike has regressed back to the two weeks he spent as a teppanyaki chef. He's been trying to craft an exquisite meal for the 'Bots, but has actually gone crazy and started cutting up everything he sees. He even chops Crow's hand off and serves it to him, the 'Bot actually thinking it's delicious because he's so hungry.
Segment 1
- As he tries to eat Crow's severed hand, Mike and the 'Bots get a call on an old World War II field phone under the desk. Pearl makes the emergency call to report that the Camping Planet has come under seige by an army of renegade warlike robots! She's on the front lines with Bobo fighting off the malfunctioning fiends, while Brain Guy is a creepy nurse/medic since his kind were pacifists. Pearl begs the SOL for air support, to which Mike starts filling a baking soda/vinegar bomb to stop the renegade robots. He unfortunately vapor locks while remembering all the trouble these bombs got him into at school and his temp jobs. By the time he drops the bomb, it's so full of baking soda that it destroys both the robots and the Camping Planet, bringing Mike's planetary destruction count to three. As his punishment, a haggard Pearl sends out today's experiment as she tends to her wounded crewmates in the Widowmaker.
Segment 2
- Servo dresses as Anthony Geary and performs a tribute to "The Funky Seventies" on his keytar. His lyrics containing references about Mt. Vesuvius and Emperor Titus prompt Mike and Crow to realize that Servo's singing about the decade of 70-79 A.D.. After being clarified about the mistake by Mike and Crow, Servo performs a new song about the 50s... back when Emperor Claudius died and the Apostles traveled to Greece.
Segment 3
- Inspired by all the trucking in the film, Servo announces that he's become a trucker, gaining a manly styrofoam latex trucker body and waxing poetic about the open road. Mike voices his disgust about Servo's new paunch and his really flat butt, but the 'Bot is proud of his new look, especially since he continues being a trucker in the theater.
Segment 4
- Crow dons a superhero costume and becomes Turkey Volume Guessing Man, based on the overuse of calling people "turkeys" in today's film, who is able to estimate the volume of any area by measuring how many turkeys would fit inside it. Mike tries his own hand in turkey volume guessing and absent-mindedly steals Crow's thunder, leading to the costumed bot experiencing a nervous breakdown, but he recovers when Mike gives him a turkey sandwich for lunch.
Segment 5
- Mike and the 'Bots halfheartedly roleplay as the cast of Riding with Death, complete with a cardboard Abby, while trying to figure out what the film was actually all about, to no avail. Pearl calls the SOL on the field phone to have the crew bear witness as she's awarded for her war victories. The last medal she gets is so big and heavy that she can't hold up her head, sending the Widowmaker into a nosedive.
The Mystery Science Theater 3000 presentation of Riding with Death features:
- AcCENT upon the Wrong SylLABle: Lampshaded.Dr. Hale: This can't beeEE! You're DEAD!Mike: No, Iii'm nooOT!Crow: It can't beEE! You're inviiisiIBLE!
- Always Someone Better: Mike turns out to be this towards Crow when it comes to the field of guessing how many turkeys it would take to fill a given space.
- Ambiguously Gay: Observer, again. This time, he's dressed as a female nurse, while calling himself a Red Cross medic. (Of course, no field medic has ever been in a nurse's dress.)Pearl: Brain Guy, what the hell is your deal?
Observer: My race is pacifist and does not believe in war. We only kill out of personal spite. - Asian Cleaver Fever: The opening skit shows Mike having a Flashback to his days as a teppanyaki chef. He cuts Crow's hand off whilst swinging knives around.Servo: Mike's dangerous enough just wielding that big, clunky body of his!
- Aw, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: Pearl sends Mike "Riding with Death" as punishment for seemingly harming Bobo with his baking-soda bomb.Pearl: Aw, Nelson, look what you've done. This poor, noble ape is gonna croak and it's all your fault! I'm sending you the worst movie I know. It's called Riding with Death and it sucks on toast!
- I'll Kill You!: Observer changes his mind when he finds out Bobo just has hunger pains and attempts strangling Bobo.
- Baby Don't Got Back: Tom Servo builds a new trucker body for himself, but Mike doesn't approve of the bow-legged, assless redneck look.Tom: Ah, you're just jealous, Nelson! I have a fine butt! You wish you had my butt! I like my butt! [swivels head around] Yeah, I like you, butt.
- Billions of Buttons: The control panel for the fighter jet.Servo: All this and no tape deck?
- Bluff the Imposter: Lampshaded.Mike: (as Hale) Sam, I'm blown to several thousand bits, but I've gotta finish these patent papers!
- Call-Back:
- At one point Mike mocks Abby's screams of "SaaaaAAAAM!" by saying "VaaaaAAAAAAANCE!" like Dr. Langer in The Giant Spider Invasion — a movie they'd seen just four episodes previous.
- Near the end of the third act, just before Denby is arrested, Servo notes "Hey look, a couple of VaaaaAAAAAAANS!"
- On a related note, Servo even gets in a "JeeeeeEEEEEEEEEeeeeed!" (the Running Gag from The Leech Woman). Crow groans, "Oh, here we go!"
- During the host segments, Observer claims to be a pacifist during The Siege on the "Camping Planet" — well, a Technical Pacifist: "We only kill out of personal spite." At the end, when Bobo gets distracted and starts singing Asia's "Only Time Will Tell" after playing the solo for Pearl's award ceremony, Brain Guy wordlessly points a pistol at Bobo until he stops.
- In the Turkey Day version of the episode, Pearl also described Night of the Blood Beast as "it sucks on toast."
- At one point Mike mocks Abby's screams of "SaaaaAAAAM!" by saying "VaaaaAAAAAAANCE!" like Dr. Langer in The Giant Spider Invasion — a movie they'd seen just four episodes previous.
- Cardboard Pal: Mike and company have one in the form of Abby in the final segment.
- Celebrity Resemblance: Invoked. Due to Alan Oppenheimer's slight resemblance to Gavin MacLeod at the time, which, being the '70s and all, prompts quite a few Mary Tyler Moore Show jokes.
- Compilation Movie: Repeatedly mocked. During the end credits, the crew sarcastically voice "Up Next!" network bumpers by accident, then correct themselves, insisting that is is a real released-in-theaters movie.Mike: ♪ By Mennen! ♫
- Also:Mike: Riding With Death will be right back... (Commercial Break Cliffhanger Fade to Black... then immediately Fade From Black) ...and we're back.
- Also:Servo: Next up: Karen Valentine guest stars on Hec Ramsey- I mean, when you get home from the theater tonight after this fine movie, heh.
- Also:Mike: Okay, switch over to Name of the Game. Oh, wait...
- Also:
- Cowboy BeBop at His Computer: Spoofed; due to the "movie's" name, the guys start referring to the Tripolodine as "Death".Crow: (after Abby rigs together a makeshift hammock to keep the Tripolodine from bouncing around too much in the box) Why'd she put Death in a Jolly Jumper?
- Crazy Enough to Work: During the credits, Crow seems to consider the idea that the movie had an "Executive Story Consultant" unbelievable.Crow: An executive story consultant?!
Servo: (as the consultant) Yes. I advise that you cast the most annoying cracker you can find and slam together two incomprehensible stories!- Incidentally, the show's executive story consultant was... Steven Bochco. THE Steven Bochco.Servo: Steven Bochco?! We're not going to have to see Dennis Franz's hairy buttcheeks, are we?
- Incidentally, the show's executive story consultant was... Steven Bochco. THE Steven Bochco.
- Double Entendre: Mike and the Bots' commentary during the sequence when Buffalo Bill's truck is used to slow down Casey's out-of-control vehicle:Sam: Alrighty, I'm coming up on your mudflaps at 67.
Crow: "Coming up on your mudflaps." People have such cute names for sex.
Mike: Ma' well-oiled chassis is comin' up on yer backside, now.
Servo: My rigid grill structure is bearin' down on yer unprotected cargo door.
Crow: My oft-complimented Peterbilt is rhythmically nudging that sweet honey pot of yours?
Mike and Servo: Crow!
(...)
Mike: Drained and satisfied, I'm tracin' lazy circles on yer' supercab now.
Crow: You said I was bad...
Mike: You inspired me.- Then:
Crow: (singing) So I sing you to sleep, after the truckin'...
Servo: Now they have to get married. - Dumbass Has a Point: The crew is duly impressed when Sam manages to fool Hale into revealing he's not actually in the back of the truck.
- Exact Words: Servo's songs about the '70s and '50s don't say they're explicitly about the 1970s and 1950s respectively.
- Form-Fitting Wardrobe: The crew have fun with the
WTH, Costuming Department?.- On Abby:
Crow: Operation Cameltoe!- On Sam:
Crow: The rare male cameltoe! - Gasshole:
- Pearl and Observer think the enemy has unleashed mustard gas on them, but Bobo says he'd just eaten a jar of Plochman's with his knish for lunch.
- When Abby accidentally causes a small explosion by tossing a Tripolodine-stained tissue over her shoulder:Crow: Man, I really cut one.
- Pearl and Observer think the enemy has unleashed mustard gas on them, but Bobo says he'd just eaten a jar of Plochman's
- Hayseed Name: When he sees that H. G. Wells got an Original Story credit, Servo says that's not the H. G. Wells, but Hud Gomer Wells.
- Homage: Crow shaking Mike and demanding, "What did you do with that planet, you silly stupid old man?! Someone's going to jail and it's not gonna be me!" was the crew's homage to Jimmy Stewart, who died during the shooting of the episode in 1997.
- Ho Yay: In-universe, the crew sees something more than just a blossoming bromance between Sam and Buffalo.Bill: Sam...
Crow: (as Bill) Let's move in together. - I Resemble That Remark!: After Driscoll calls Roberty Denby a turkey, Mike and the Bots riff Denby answering the phone with "gobble gobble" much to his chagrin.
- I Taste Delicious: Mike fancies himself a teppanyaki chef, but is more concerned with chopping than serving. When Mike cuts off Crow's hand and proceeds to chop it, Crow moans he's so hungry his own hand smells good to him, then offers Mike to chop and serve his own head.
- Jumping on a Grenade: Subverted. Bobo ("I'll save you, Lawgiver!") throws Observer onto a live grenade, where it explodes underneath him.Observer: (dazed) It's a good thing I don't have a body!
- Literal-Minded: When asked to sing a song about The '70s, Tom Servo sings a '70s-style disco song about the events of 70-79 AD. He later tries to sing about The '50s... as in a nostalgic "do you remember" song about the events of 50-59 AD.
- Looping Lines: Called out in-universe. The crew all snicker at the extremely forced, underwritten ADR used to awkwardly shoehorn the two TV episodes together. Made especially obvious by the fact that this is done by looping in the lines while the characters are offscreen, and all the more blatant with Abby, who obviously isn't even in the second episode... that is to say, second half of the movie. "I said that and then clammed up instantly!"Driscoll: [offscreen] If you don't show yourself, I'll put you back on the Denby case!
M&TB: [all laugh]
Crow: Nice ADR there. - Made of Explodium: Lampshaded. The Tripolodine is supposed to be this, but Special Effects Failure mean it's less than threatening:Abby: I don't know how long it takes, but just a couple of drops on a tissue nearly blew this whole room apart!
Mike: Well, it knocked over a chair. - Martial Pacifist: The Observer discloses that his race doesn't believe in war and that they only kill out of "personal spite."
- Mike Nelson, Destroyer of Worlds: The Trope Namer rides again. "What's that, three for you now?" Pearl actually calls him "Destroyer of Worlds" in reference to Oppenheimer/the Bhagavad-Gita.
- Mondegreen Gag: During the climax of the second "half", Jim Stafford says something that the MST crew hears as "New England journalists", which prompts a lively debate over the merits of journalists from all over our fine country.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: The baking soda bomb probably wouldn't have been as disastrous had Mike not packed too much baking soda into it (not helped by him suddenly remembering a similar bomb that cost him a job in the past due to someone ratting on him, causing him to grab a giant box of the stuff).
- Not so Dire: Bobo is groaning apparently in pain in the Widowmaker after Mike blows up the planet they were on, with Pearl thinking he's going to die. But it turns out he's just hungry for a knish. Observer starts strangling him.
- Overly Long Gag: Driscoll spends several minutes cleaning his glasses, which are filled entirely with over the top squeaking sounds and the occasional "Still dirty!" Achieves Brick Joke status when after speaking to him over a CB radio, Mike has Ben ponder that Driscoll sounds like his glasses are dirty over the radio.
- Periphery Demographic: Invoked during the movie's end credits:Mike: Y'know, for some reason, this movie was a hit with elderly black women and Hispanic lesbians.
- Potty Failure:Crow: (as Buffalo Bill) "I pooped my drawers, I'm so excited!"
- Product Placement:
- Arm & Hammer is all over the segment with the baking soda bomb.
- Plochman's is a well-known mustard company.
- Punctuated Pounding: "MELL! OW! OUT!"
- Remember the New Guy?: In the second half, the doctor who shows up to tell Driscoll he's wrong about Denby.Crow: And you are...?
(later)
Crow: I hate being badgered by pharmacists! - Running Gag:
- Turkey jokes for Jive Turkey Sam Casey.
- "Leave Robert Denby alone!" This one was actually carried over into other episodes whose featured movies starred William Sylvester (Gorgo and Devil Doll, in case you were wondering).
- The doubting doctor trying to get the Properly Paranoid Driscoll to lay off of Robert Denby, and sounding like he's about to burst into tears when Driscoll doesn't.
- The elusive Robert Denby.
- "You're so elusive!"
- "I seek Robert Denby. I need to know why I was considered as elusive as him."
- Dr. Hale's hilariously inept attempts to convince Sam that he's still in the cargo compartment but doesn't want to be disturbed.Servo: Don't come back here, I'm doing, eh heh, naked burpees◊!
Mike: (when the truck explodes) Sam, I'm blown to several thousand bits, but I've gotta finish these patent papers! - Driscoll's filthy, filthy glasses, which the character spends several minutes continuously scrubbing while talking to Sam over the radio. "Man, I can practically hear the filth on his glasses!"
- The '70s references come fast and furious, especially Sam's being "mellow"."Her codename: Muskrat Suzie!"
"What would Toni Tennille do?" - Alan Oppenheimer's resemblance to Gavin MacLeod leads to a few Mary Tyler Moore references when Hale is onscreen.Mike (as Sue Ann Nivens, when Hale shoots at Sam): Oh, Murray... dear, sweet, homicidal Murray.
- Referring to Cupcake by other pastry names. "Profiterole has a black heart."Crow: Bear Claw, no!
Mike: Cupcake, get Twinkie the Kid and Fruit Pie the Magician!
Crow: The day is yours Cupcake, we shall meet again!... You will rule the world, Emperor Cupcake! - The idea that Sam is only accidentally turning invisible while checking his watch.Crow (as Sam): It's quarter to three now— (Sam turns invisible) D'oh!
- Several times Abby whimpers "Sam" and Tom says, "You made the pants too long." (It's a reference to an early Barbra Streisand novelty song.)
- Buffalo Bill being a racist hick. One riff has him as a member of a posse comitatus.Crow: See, crackers and hicks can get along.
- Abby's Stock Footage appearance in the second half makes the crew constantly wonder where the hell she's supposed to be.Crow: Mike? Did the ozone layer finally give out...?!
- The fact that it's only a second or two of footage being run backwards and forwards gives her a weird, dazed appearance as well:Mike: (as Abby) IiI've beEn drRugGed...!
- The fact that it's only a second or two of footage being run backwards and forwards gives her a weird, dazed appearance as well:
- Shown Their Work: Tom Servo's songs on "The '70s" and "The '50s" recount the actual events of AD 50-79, including namechecking Saint Paul and the Emperor Titus, as well the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius.
- Small Name, Big Ego: "I'm Ben Murphy."
- Squick: Invoked. Mike and the Bots express their displeasure when Sam and Buffalo Bill first meet.Sam: You know I'm right on your back door, buddy.
Crow: Ewwww.
Bill: Well, you can keep the Black Barts off my mudflaps.
All: (disgusted noises) - Someone Else's Problem: Mike's initial response to Mrs. Forrester and Bobo fighting in a WWII-esque battle scene is an unenthusiastic "...and?"
- Suspiciously Specific Denial:Sam: How you ridin' back there, Doctor?Mike: (as Hale) I'm not in a helicopter!
- Talkative Loon: Mike and the Bots' impressions of Buffalo Bill, turning his super-enthusiastic Good Ol' Boy talk into gibberish.
- Technical Pacifist: The Observers as a race, according to Observer, who don't believe in war. They only kill out of personal spite. Or just for the hell of it, considering they previously tried to force Bobo and Pearl to duel to the death for no particular reason. Well, it didn't involve Observers fighting.
- They Called Me Mad!: Pearl called the Satellite of Love to send a distraction against a robot army, so Mike prepares a baking soda bomb. But when he remembers how he was persecuted in his youth over similar pranks, he starts muttering bitterly about it, and ends up way overfilling the bomb, leading to the planet itself being destroyed.
- Third-Person Person: They turn Ben Murphy into this.
- This Is a Work of Fiction: Servo seems to consider it a blessing when the disclaimer pops up in the credits.Mike: All characters depicted are...really stupid and disgusting.
Servo: Any similarities to actual persons would be really sad.- When the "film" claims to be based on a work by H. G. Wells:Servo: No, no, they mean Hud Gomer Wells.
- When the "film" claims to be based on a work by H. G. Wells:
- This Is Gonna Suck: The moment Buffalo Bill is introduced singing comically badly, without Jim Stafford even in frame yet, Mike and Crow give little muted reactions of disappointment.Crow: Oh, my —
Mike: Ohhh. No. - Toilet Humor: Turns out it's not mustard gas - just Bobo after eating a whole jar of mustard.
- What Kind of Lame Power Is Heart, Anyway?: Inspired by a multitude of references to turkeys in the film (okay, one or two), Crow takes up the mantle of Turkey Volume Guessing Man! ...who is able to instinctively calculate how many turkeys could fit in a given space, i.e. express something's volume in units of turkey. Sadly this power isn't useful at all, but finds it's a great way to wallow in being a '90s Anti-Hero with a Traumatic Superpower Awakening, which attracts babes. He's very disappointed to learn that Mike can do it too... until he latches onto the idea of Super Team of turkey guessers.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Crow gets pissed after Mike Nelson blows up his third planet.Crow: So, that makes, what, three for you now? (Beat) ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR STUPID, ROTTED SKULL, YOU DUMB MAN?!
- In the movie, Casey and Abby joke about robbing a bank to recoup the embezzled $10 million. Driscoll is not amused, which Mikes plays into.
Mike: (as Driscoll) Okay, who wants their butt kicked first? - With Lyrics: Mike and the bots sing some of the credits names to the instrumental tune heard in the end credits.
- Writers Cannot Do Math: The plot of the first half of the movie is how Sam has to get a truck from Torrance to Long Beach, a trip that normally takes roughly 20 minutes in real life.Mike: So they have thirteen hours to drive from Torrance to Long Beach?
- Not to mention they talk about going through Cedarville... which is twenty-one hours away from both!
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