"Isn't that the John Belushi biography?"
"Well, that's something you didn't hear much during the Bush administration."
I wonder where she's registered.
Films watched: Hired! (short) Part 1 and Bride of the Monster
Being split into two parts to fit the running time, Hired! holds the honor of being the only non-serial short to be watched in two subsequent episodes. In the first part, we're introduced to a Chevrolet sales manager who is having difficulties in making sales and keeping his men in order, prompting him to get advice from his father.
The episode is available in the Gizmoplex here
, and on Shout! Factory here.
The Segments
Prologue- Joel connects a machine to the slumbering Crow's brain to see what he's dreaming about. The dream involves Crow being filthy rich, getting showered with almond bark, and flirting with Servo in a nurse's outfit.
Segment 1/Invention Exchange
- Frank and Dr. Forrester are having a fight, giving them the perfect opportunity to demonstrate their Tough Love Seat. Joel and the Bots have Microwave Faith Popcorn, which predicts all the trends of the future.
Segment 2
- Based on the short, Joel and the Bots perform "Hired! The Musical".
Segment 3
- Joel, Crow, and Tom discuss the octopus from the film. Somehow, the conversation wanders to cold tater tots and olive loaf. Everyone is grossed out and confused.
Segment 4
- Crow returns as Willy the Waffle, this time to defend the importance of advertising.
Segment 5
- Cambot re-edits the ending of the movie so it makes more sense, with Joel and the 'Bots playing the part of Bela’s scientist. The Mads pretend to be Bela and Tor. Frank is very disturbed.
The MST3K presentation of Hired! (Part 1) features:
- All Musicals Are Adaptations: MST3K present: Hired! The Musical.
- Angry Mob Song: "Can't you see we're trying to tell you NO!"
- Artistic License – Economics: "Uncle Sam's gonna need cars! Why, selling Chevrolets is gonna help the war effort! Don't ya see, Dad? Come on everybody!"
- BSoD Song: "Zeroes... / Zeroes... / None of my salesmen / has ever sold a car..."
- Extra! Extra! Read All About It!: "Extry, extry, read all about it! Pearl Harbor bombed, Roosevelt declares war!"
- Funny Background Event: During Hired! The Musical, at one point Joel sits in the background with his head down while Servo sings with Gypsy occasionally echoing a line. Every time Gypsy sings Joel looks up with an utterly perplexed look on his face.
- Gecko Ending: Joel and the 'Bots make up an ending of their own after Part 1, since they don't see Part 2 of Hired! until the next episode. They come up with something involving World War II breaking out. Also counts as No Ending because they get interrupted by the Commercial Sign before they could finish. They are understandably disappointed.SOL Crew: See... The... USA in your che-(The Commercial Sign alarm begins to flash, ending the number right then and there)Joel: Stop, we got commercial sign...Gypsy: Awww....Tom: Oh, for cryin' out loud!Crow: What's the point..?
- Hello, [Insert Name Here]:Tom: (as Jimmy) Um, "Hello sir or madam..."
- Ho Yay: Joel and the 'bots imply this about Mr. Warren and Jimmy.
- "I Am Becoming" Song: Servo as the dealership manager sings about how his failure is a Foregone Conclusion, and that he's going to turn out just like his father — a failure.
- "I Am" Song: He's Hired, and nobody can deny that.
- Job Song: Joel and the bots singing about being hired counts.
- Loser Son of Loser Dad: The crew's interpretation of the elderly father and his middle-aged son in the short is that both are lifelong failures — like father, like son. Hammered home by the big finish of Servo's "I Am Becoming" Song in the musical:Servo: I'd like to make a sale, but what can I do? I'm gonna be a failure just like yoooou, dad!
Crow: Like me?
Servo: That's right! I'm gonna be a failure just like yoooooooooou! - Running Gag: Joel and the Bots pointing out that Jimmy really should have an actual car to show.note
- Show Within a Show: "Hired!", the guys' new musical based on the day's short.
- Sorry, I Left the BGM OnServo: (as one of Jimmy's potential customers) Could ya turn down the music?! I can't hear a word you're saying!
- Special Edition: When Shout! Factory rereleased Manos: The Hands of Fate, not only was the original second half of Hired! on here, they actually fused both parts together and released it as a bonus feature, just because they could.
The MST3K presentation of Bride of the Monster features:
- Accidental Pervert: After Vornoff hypnotizes Janet and his hand hovers over her chest due to being interrupted, Joel and Crow start yelling "Cut" and "Whoa, whoa, whoa!", mistaking Vornoff for a pervert.
- And Call Him "George": When Lobo grabs one of the two hunters at the start of the movie.Crow (as Lobo): I will hug him and feed him and call him Mine.
- Body Double: When the obvious Bela stand-in is killed, Joel wonders, "But where's Bela?"
- Earlier, "This is Bela's best scene and he's not even in it!"
- Bottomless Magazines: Lampshaded by Crow.Crow: How many shots does he have?
- Brain Bleach: Crow has sexual dreams fantasizing about Tom in a nurse's outfit. Both Crow and Tom (who happens to be dressed as a nurse) scream when Crow wakes up and sees Tom.
- Briar Patching: A world without advertising is pretty good, such as Servo noting without advertising, sneakers would cost a fraction of what they currently do.
- Call-Back:
- A couple to the short "Hired!", the first part of which was shown with this film in the MST3K presentation.Tom: No, I don't want to buy a Chevrolet!
- The New Zoo Revue Running Gag with Harvey B. Dunn from his previous appearance in Teenagers from Outer Space makes a cameo appearance.
- "Yeah, I guess that is the word for it... weird."
- Crow brings back his Willy the Waffle costume from Viking Women and the Sea Serpent for the "No Advertising" sketch, which Servo points out as having been used in that exact episode. In Crow's defense, it was the only costume he could quickly find.
- Crow, as Willy, quotes Mr. B Natural: "Knew your father, I did".
- A couple to the short "Hired!", the first part of which was shown with this film in the MST3K presentation.
- Call-Forward: The third host segment involves Crow dressed as Willy the Waffle again, showing Servo what life would be like without advertising. This is a parody of A Case of Spring Fever, which wouldn't be featured on the show until the tenth season.
- Candy Striper: In the prologue Joel connects a machine to Crow's brain to see what he dreams about. He's assisted by "Nurse Servo," who wears a red-and-white striped apron and nurse's cap. Crow's dream involves piles of money and Tom Servo in the same Candy Striper outfit.
- Fan Disservice: "Big Face Theater!"
- Overly Narrow Superlative: Ed Wood is described as one of Hollywood's finest crossdressing directors.
- Red Shirt:Crow: (as Strowski) Hello! I'm the worthless ancillary character waiting to be killed off!
- Running Gag:
- It wouldn't be an Ed Wood experiment without at least one (or half a dozen) jokes about crossdressing.
- Hulk Speak lines imitating Tor Johnson as Lobo.note
- In another scene, Janet is served food by Dr. Vornoff. Joel and the bots make quite a few jokes about Lobo being the waiter.
- Jokes about the police chief's pet bird.
- In one scene, a secretary's pencil on her ear keeps disappearing and reappearing, due to bad continuity. Crow calls attention to it every time.
- Joel says "Dammit!" after the name "Janet" is spoken a few times in the movie.
- Shirtless Scene: Servo is appreciative of Tony McCoy's eagle tattoo (gotten during his military service) when the latter's shirt is torn off.
- Shout-Out:
- The two hunters at the start of the movie are referred to as Bert and Ernie (you could also call it a Shout-Out to the other Bert and Ernie too).
- Dr. Vornoff putting on his lab coat is likened to the opening of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood.Servo: (singing) It's a sinister day in the laboratory, it's a sinister day in the lab...
- "They paved Marsh Lake and put up a parking lot".
- The Strength of Ten Men: The monster walks: "Oh, no, now he has the strength of twenty heroin-addicts!"
- Take That!:Crow: Lobo take classes at DeVry.
- Wholesome Crossdresser: Tom, of course.Servo: Joel, this nurse's outfit makes me very self-conscious and embarrassed — and yet, I don't seem to mind. Weird.
