Those Are Strings, Pinocchio
"I've been a resident of Faulkner's Yoknapatampha county, hunted the White Whale aboard the Pequod, fought alongside Napoleon, sailed a raft with Huck and Jim, committed absurdities with Ignatius J. Reilly, rode a sad train with Anna Karenina, and strolled down Swann's way."
Rory's graduation speech
Rory's graduation is coming up. The Independence Inn is closing down. Luke is taking his girlfriend on a cruise in the summer while Lorelai and Rory go backpacking through Europe. Rory has been named valedictorian.
Meanwhile, Lorelai and Rory prepare for their backpacking trip through Europe. Taylor has a problem with deer entering his garden. Rory apologizes to Dean and tells him to pick a wedding gift from her from a catalog. Lorelai reveals that she can't afford both her half of the Dragonfly and Rory's Yale tuition. Rory decides to loan the money from her grandparents instead.
Tropes
- Acoustic License: Emily sits directly behind a man and calls him "extraordinarily tall" but he doesn't seem to hear it.
- The Alleged Car: Subverted. Richard and Emily buy Rory a Prius, but so do all the other Chilton parents for their kids, so it's hard to find in the parking lot.
- Angrish: After three counts of passive-aggressive resistance from her parents on the subject of sitting with her and Sookie at the graduation, Lorelai tells them to just remain where they are, which is met with an incredulous "you can't be serious!" from Emily. Lorelai let's out a frustrated noise.
- Blatant Lies:
- Paris claims she is not jealous of Rory making valedictorian instead of her. In fact, she googled it and found that valedictorians often don't make it in life, and several have died in car crashes.
- Taylor pretends to not be sure whether it's a photo of his own garden he shows to demonstrate the deer problem.
- Bookworm:
- Rory wants to bring twelve books on their backpacking trip through Europe.
- Rory's valedictorian speech has her reference her favorite books, and they are many.
- Brick Joke: The big-eared Romeo fiasco of '98 makes a comeback in the form of Lorelai being about to point out another kid's humongous— uh, the really cute kid, as she adds loudly while looking around.
- But I Digress: Downplayed. In her valedictorian speech, Rory speaks about her relationship with her mother, which the viewers know is what the show is about, but the other students might not consider entirely relevant to their education.
- Daddy Didn't Show: Emily and Richard inquire as to where Christopher is, and Lorelai says he's "out of town" but asked them to take lots of pictures.
- Diagnosed by the Audience: In-Universe. Kirk's tells how McMahon's dog suffered memory loss after a mold infestation and forgot how to sit.
- Drunk on Milk: Sookie feels a little tipsy after a glass of apple juice.
- The Fatalist: Sookie and Lorelai try to keep their expectations low about the quality of the Dragonfly property by assuming it's basically falling apart before letting Luke give his assessment.
- Foreshadowing: Lorelai tells Luke not to get engaged, like she'd expect that from the guy with commitment issues and the woman he's been dating for less than a year.
- Friendly Enemy: Rory and Paris say good-bye to each other, fondly recalling that most of the time they hated each other.
- God: Invoked. After learning she is not getting financial aid for Yale, Rory declares that she has to go wail to God. Lorelai asks Rory to tell her "hi" from her.
- Gratuitous Foreign Language: Paris switches between English and Portuguese when talking to her nanny's family.
- Hired Help as Family: Paris's nanny is very proud of her and attends her high school graduation unlike her rich jerk parents. Paris who is often mean and way too harsh is shown to be happy to have the nanny there and acting nice to her nanny and the nanny's grandchildren.
- Immediate Self-Contradiction: Rory says she got a loan with "no strings attached," following it up with "I just have to pay it back after I graduate and come to Friday night dinner." Lorelai lampshades it with the episode title.
- Informed Ability: Richard compliments Rory on her dealmaking skills, despite her reluctance to take his offer of an interest-free loan and him convincing her to do so.
- Irony:
- Lorelai points out the irony in the money she got from Richard, that she used to pay back her loan from her parents that she used for school money when Rory went to high school, taking them out of the running for financial aid for Yale.
- Richard compliments Rory on her deal-making skills after she turned down free money and tried to insist on paying interest on the Yale money she borrows from him.
- It's All About Me: Lorelai is convinced that Richard and Emily are only paying Rory's Yale, tuition to manipulate her.
- Mistaken for Prank Call: Averted. Rory keeps getting random hang-up calls; Lorelai mentions she's been getting a lot of them, but doesn't think much of it. After one of them, she finds somewhere private and reveals she knows it's Jess, calling and not knowing what to say.
- Non Sequitur: When Paris receives her diploma and shakes the principal's hand, he tells her "congratulations," and she replies "no hard feelings."Headmaster Charleston: Okay...
- Once Done, Never Forgotten: Luke realizes that he will never live down having cried during Rory's speech.
- Passive-Aggressive Kombat: Emily still acts like Lorelai committed an offense by paying back the money she borrowed.
- The Pollyanna: Lorelai does her best to stay ever the optimist in the face of the Independence closing down and being unable to front her share of the money for the Dragonfly.
- Rule of Three:
- Rory has three suggestions for convincing Yale they don't have money.
- Rory is willing to go down to three books if Lorelai is willing to reduce her three tubes of toothpaste to one.
- Running Gag: Sookie pressing through an increasingly fuller row of seats at the graduation, promising every time that it won't happen again.
- Shout-Out:
- Sookie calls Michel Deney Terrio.
- Jackson puts on Creedence Clearwater Revival.
- Gypsy refers to the roaming deer as Bambis.
- Lorelai suggests Rory be Tom Brokaw's toupé-comber-outer.
- Richard thinks Rory's negotiating talents are "Eye of the Tiger."
- Lorelai mocks one of Rory's sweaters as making her look like Simone de Beauvoir.
- Paris thinks Enrique looks like Antonio Banderas.
- Lorelai points out that Rory's stringless loan from Emily and Richard does in fact have conditions, calling her Pinocchio.
- Brad namedrops Stephen Sondheim in his speech.
- Brad sings "Cherish" by Association during his graduation speech.
- In her speech, Rory mentions William Faulkner, Moby-Dick, Huckleberry Finn, Napoléon Bonaparte presumably from War and Peace, A Confederacy of Dunces, Anna Karenina and Swann's Way.
- Rory's role models included Jane Austen, Eudora Welty, and Patti Smith.
- Rory's Prius is the one that Leonardo DiCaprio drives.
- Lorelai can't scratch anything in Chilton, because it was all either walked on by Harriet Beecher Stowe, donated by Robert Frost, or lit for the first time by Thomas Edison.
- Take That!:
- Rory helpfully suggests sending the Yale people a picture of Lorelai's couch to convince them they have no money.
- Richard complains that he struggles to tie his bow right. Rory comments that bow tying not an exact science. Richard replies that nor is it an art, it's pretty much nothing.
- This Is Reality: Rory claims in her speech that her family and friends are less eccentric than the fictional characters she reads about.
- Title Drop: Lorelai switches the words around a bit, but when Rory tells her about her agreement with her grandparents, Lorelai points out: "Um, Pinocchio, those are strings."
- Trying Not to Cry: Sookie and Lorelai promise each other not to cry during Rory's speech. Luke thinks they're freaks for trying not to blubber. Turns out they all, Luke included, are moved by Rory's speech and they hold back tears.
- Win-Win Ending: Invoked by Rory, who thinks getting Emily and Richard to pay for Yale to be a win-win-win for them, herself, and Lorelai.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Rory lets Jess know about how poorly he handled his entire situation, then breaks up with him.
- X Must Not Win: Invoked. Lorelai wishes that just once, she and Rory could get exactly what they want, and for Emily and Richard to get nothing.
